Thread: BIG MIX UP... I hope

Glad to hear things are straightened out for him. That has to be a big relief for both of you. Congrats on graduating!!

He said last night when his dad got home his dad stormed in his room told him how angry he was and said "your working with me Monday." He worked with his dad last summer and did manual labor (his dad is an electrician) everyday in the hot San Diego sun for 8-10 hours, sometimes having to wake up at 4 AM. He kept telling me how bad he hated it but his parents made him. I guess his dad said if he doesn't get more hours at Target Jaime has to work with him again this summer too. Is it just me, or does anyone else see something wrong with this? Last year his mom took everyone of his paychecks. She also took his first $200 Target paycheck and said it was for all his "senior year expenses." The only reason that I, and he, can logically see as to why his parents would care how many hours he works and how much he makes is because they want his paychecks again. I feel so bad for him because he wants to save up for things and his parents take his money and say it's for bills and such and then they go to the casino until 4 in the morning leaving his with his brothers. He's 5 months from his 18th birthday and he has almost no independence. I guess his aunt is moving in with them, because she's having marital problems, and getting his room (which he's only had for 4 months or so) and he has to move back into his brothers room which is real small, not to mention his brothers destroy everything. Safe place to keep college books and stuff and a very nice place to study. *sigh* I'm going so off topic, but I needed to get that out!

He needs to open a bank account, and have his paycheck direct deposited in there.

I'm glad that it was a mix-up. Those of us who panned him for not doing his work were obviously wrong. I'm glad he is graduating.

As for his working...well...technically, his parents are still supporting him and paying his bills and are entitled to his money. However, their actions do seem rather harsh to me.

When my kids lived at home and worked, I required that they paid 'rent' to me. However, they still had money left over afterward. The rent hardly covered their expenses, but was instead set up so that they would get into the habit of paying bills timely. I didn't think it was right for them to just have lots of discretionary money and not contribute to the household.

This doesn't seem to be the situation though. In thinking back on your various previous posts, it appears as if Jaime's parents are quite controlling. He is going to have to decide if he wants out when he is 18.

This is just a question to everyone else on the board. Do you have to wait until you are 18 to move out? I hear about people all the time who left their parent's homes while technically underage. Some of those people are members of this board.

What are the ramifications of moving out without your parent's permission if you are not 18 years old?

Congrats on the both of you getting to graduate! If I were him I would do what the other have said, open a checking account with direct deposit. That way his money goes straight to the bank. I could see if maybe they were putting up money for him for college or getting his own place but not to go to a casino. Anyway, congrats again and I hope you have a great time tonorrow!

glad he's gonna get to graduate. As far as the paycheck thing, that's tough. I think the parents are a little too grabby for his money, although I think if they wanted $20 a week for expenses, they are entitled to it. But it sounds like he does his time at home too . . . . babysitting. I could see if he was over 18 and they wanted big rent but technically he's still required to be under their roof. But it isn't right that they take all his earnings.

Since He is so close to His 18th birthday. He could leave right now and there is not nothing they could do about it. That is how it is where I live. I did that, I worked hard for my money sometimes till 12 or 1:00 in the morning, My parents would also take my paycheck. I bought a car and my dad took it and drove it while I paid for it.
I meet my hubby and He had connections with the local police department, they told me I could leave at 17 and them not be able to bring me back, I just had to leave a note if they werent home when I left stating I wasnt kidnapped that I left on my own free will. Well Hubby helped me and I did it. I left a note and that is what covered my butt. My dad reported me as missing and old them hubby then boyfriend kidnapped me. Anyways, they came and talked to me to make sure I wasnt kidnapped and then everything was fine. The police told my parents that I was to old to be brought home.
We also just in Dec. went thru this with my sister. She left by my help and then Mom and Dad was gonna have her brought back but the police said they couldnt cause she was 17 and would turn 18 in Jan.
So if He is serious about moving out then check with the local police they will tell You what You can do.
I wish You both the best in Your lives. Congrats to the both of You on Graduating.

I'm fairly certain once you graduate high school that you can 'leave home'. It may not be what he has in mind... but tell him to apply to a local college that provides housing and try to get enough financial aid so he can live on campus. Or ask your parents if he can sleep on your couch.

Glad you both got to graduate!