1. #1
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    A year of firsts.

    A year of firsts, first Birthday, first Thanksgiving, first Christmas, first New Years, it will go on and on, waiting for that phone call mom saying Happy New Year's kiddo. It's been a bad year for losing people, I don't recall a year where we have lost so many in one year so I'm going to make a few calls today, letting people know I'm thinking of them. There are days the loss sinks in that you will never hear that personal rendition of Happy Birthday and me saying you don't have to sing. What was I thinking???? I wasn't. She laughed. So many gone. Knowing some are going this year, another cousin with cancer I didn't expect her to make it to Christmas, she is in hospice. Probably the 1st funeral of the year. Maybe the last Aunt and Uncle of my husband, both in their mid 90's, probably his only brother, known his side since the early 80s, wow time moves quickly, I was 19, was I once 19? I met his parents when they were younger then I am right now. If there is someone you haven't talked to in a while take today to give them a call, let nothing go unsaid, let no grievance go unhealed, be the bigger person, say you are sorry first if they hang up you tried but don't say "I wish". If wishes were fishes.
    Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people's things alone, and be kind to one another.

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    I made it through the year of firsts, I was talking to a friend who lost her husband a month before my mom passed telling her I am so glad this first year is over and she told me yes now it's 2 years since...… I thought great, Thanks. People cope differently to loss, it doesn't matter how old they were, I remember hearing she lived a good long life, I remember saying that I also know I won't say that again, it doesn't matter how long they were sick, I remember hearing my friend acknowledge her husband was no longer in pain, I'm not sure that helped her very much. I think I'm going to stick with I'm very sorry for your loss and say something nice, like I really enjoyed working with them, or a great sense of humor or how kind they were. What do you say?
    Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people's things alone, and be kind to one another.

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    I last posted to this on 8/5/19, by 8/24/19 my FIL was in the hospital, I had the morning/day shift, my husband had the late afternoon through evening shift, he left the hospital for rehab on 9/19/19, we were very happy and ran the same shifts at the facility, 10/4 while in rehab we found out he was in stage 4 kidney failure and he passed on the 6th. So we are back to our year of firsts, his B-Day was in March, then Easter, DH's Mom died on Easter 2014, soon it will be Fathers day. I miss them both terribly, with this virus I'm glad they aren't here to see it, mom was in assisted living and they have had several cases and are in lockdown in their rooms and can't have visitors. FIL was at home but I'm sure would have gotten it because he would be to stubborn to shelter in place. Staying at home gives you to much time to think, I think. We waited until the first of the year to start cleaning out the house to get through the holidays, going great until the virus, now everything is at a stand still, no place open to donate, no way to sell stuff so we can't put the house on the market. 50 years of stuff to go through almost done.
    Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people's things alone, and be kind to one another.

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    My best friend's mom died Oct 2018, my mom died Feb 2016. BFF & I were talking, about a month ago, about how difficult this would have been for our moms.
    Life really stinks. Mother's Day is very hard, then my mom died less than 2 weeks before her birthday.
    I feel your pain, you have my sympathy. The holidays are never the same.

    ((hugs))

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    I know what you mean. We go into my FIL's house and it's no longer the hub of activity it once was, pretty much everything is moved into the living room and kitchen. Got to get someone to pick up the furnature and move some of the larger things we can't but we see the light at the end of the tunnel. Covid messed everything up, we should have been done by now. I don't think my mom, who lived in assisted living would have done well with the virus and my FIL would have done what he wanted anyway no matter what the precautions were so I'm glad they aren't here for this or the unrest in parts of the country. This to will pass is what I keep telling myself.
    Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people's things alone, and be kind to one another.

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