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  1. #12
    baragabrat's Avatar
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    I have not had this type of experience but I have had others in which I gave someone power over me and suffered severe mental anguish over it, leading to a nearly successful suicide attempt. After nearly 10 years, most of them spent in therapy, I have the power over my own life. I will not abide this individual to affect me in such a way again.

    YOU are in charge of your own happiness. The phrase "you make me mad" or the like is hogwash. Folks cannot do to us what we don't allow them to do. Turn around, uninvolve yourself with these folks and walk the hell away! And you will do this for YOU! YOU are important and I believe you can be strong in this! It won't be easy. Whenever someone wants to talk about "the situation" (and they obviously will because they seem to thrive on it) tell them you don't care to discuss it and change the subject. If they don't want to do so, walk away, leave the place where you are both occupying the same space. Leave that person with her mouth hanging open. Whatever the topic is, it cannot kill you and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger! I know this for a personal fact, dadgummit!
    What Goes Around, Comes Around

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  3. #13
    pepperpot's Avatar
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    My nephew is getting married, I recently went to the bridal shower. I said hello/greeted my sisters-in-law and then proceeded to sit at another table and ended up with my brother's ex's family! That was a hoot!

    I'd rather sit with them and actually enjoyed their company than with my current SILs (drama & stupidity). I could just imagine what is being said and I don't care. I didn't allow them the opportunity to make me feel uncomfortable.

    Even though my brother's ex was a nightmare (and she wasn't there), her sisters were very pleasant and there was no drama from the past. We were all mature enough to have let it go.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

  4. #14

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    Well isn't it real convenient the email was deleted so they can keep peace in the family. And according to them it was a bad one too. Yeah its real convenient that when you ask to see what you're accused of this time they can't send it. There was no email it was just more lies like all the others that have been going around in our family. I'm beginning to wonder if some of them thrive on lieing and spreading lies. And oh yeah I should be happy about it. I'll be happy when they get tired of lieing.

    I REALLY HATE LIARS!!!!!!

    You know its taken me eleven years but I finally realize theres no use anymore. I'm finally backing out of this family stuff thats going on. Its got too destructive and I'm really tired of lies and trying to defend myself only to be called a liar. I've finally reached the point where I'm done. This last lie was the last straw. And them not even letting me see it but comdemning me anyway was it for me. I hope they enjoy the lies among themselves now because I don't want any part of it anymore. If they had considered me family they would have at least called and asked me if I did it before condemning me but they didn't and that definitely sent the message to me that I'm not family anymore.
    Last edited by gmyers; 04-04-2012 at 05:31 PM.

  5. #15
    pepperpot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gmyers View Post
    Well isn't it real convenient the email was deleted so they can keep peace in the family. And according to them it was a bad one too. Yeah its real convenient that when you ask to see what you're accused of this time they can't send it. There was no email it was just more lies like all the others that have been going around in our family. I'm beginning to wonder if some of them thrive on lieing and spreading lies. And oh yeah I should be happy about it. I'll be happy when they get tired of lieing.

    I REALLY HATE LIARS!!!!!!
    Beginning to wonder? It has been plain, clear and loud as a bell since the first incident. No doubt in my mind.

    P.S. Don't hold your breathe expecting them to get tired of their shennanigans, they won't.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

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  7. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by gmyers View Post
    Well isn't it real convenient the email was deleted so they can keep peace in the family. And according to them it was a bad one too. Yeah its real convenient that when you ask to see what you're accused of this time they can't send it. There was no email it was just more lies like all the others that have been going around in our family. I'm beginning to wonder if some of them thrive on lying and spreading lies. And oh yeah I should be happy about it. I'll be happy when they get tired of lying.

    I REALLY HATE LIARS!!!!!!
    You have got to be kidding me - you are just now figuring out they like to lie and spread rumors? Honey it is time to face the truth. They have been doing this to you for years - I mean we all know they do because they twist you in such a knot. Please change your phone number and e-mail address and don't share it with them. If they want to communicate with you they can do it face to face or via US Mail. You have to quit giving them the power over you. Sorry I know it sounds like I am being mean but they are the ones being mean and you have to stop letting them have that power over your life. Now repeat the following everytime they call you "you are not going to run over me - I am a strong woman and I don't need your crap in my life".

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    gmyers, have you even read any of the responses people have given to your post? All you do is post over and over again how no one will send you the e-mail. You know there is no e-mail and we all know there is no e-mail. What's the point? You are so being controlled by these people...and you seem to want to thrive on it. Yep, they are liars. Why are you surprised? They are petty. This isn't new. They love to play games with your head. They have been doing it for years. You wonder if they thrive on spreading lies? Of course they do. But, you seem to thrive on the drama. You know the truth. People who really know you AND love you know the truth. These toxic people know the truth as well, but they don't care. They only care about sucking into the drama and you seem to go so willingly.

    Stop giving them control of your life. Don't get sucked in. You are allowing them to push your buttons. Stop...and you will feel so much better.
    Never argue with an idiot. It will bring you down to his level and he’ll win because of experience.

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  11. #18

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    Then I guess no one iin my family knows me because they all believe whats being said. I know theres no email because I didn't send one.

  12. #19
    pepperpot's Avatar
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    I wouldn't say "no one". Someone (or perhaps a few) does know you and knows you very well and is very jealous of you. They are so jealous of you that they will spread lies about you and twist other people's views of you to make themselves look better or so they can be the victim of "mean" you.

    As you say, you know there is no email, you know that the whole situation has been made up and is a lie. And they know how GOOD you are and they also know that you know as well.

    I would rather be alone or with just a few who know the real me well, than a whole bunch of people who believe lies about me.

    If you refuse to discuss the situation, you will win and take their power away.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

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  14. #20
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    Why do you care what anyone thinks or believes???? Just because you are related to them doesn't mean you need to give a rat's behind what anybody else thinks!

    There are just are those people who will believe what they want to believe even if they are hit on the side of the head with the truth/facts or a x4!!!

    Stop already...YOU & only you can continue to go around this like a merry-go-round or YOU choose to get off the crazy ride & live a normal, sane life far-far away from these people.

    I went through some crap this wek with my family. I just chose to not care. My sister called me yesterday at work no less to complain about Mom & I not going to her son's home for dinner. They made all this extra food ...really...for 2 extra people??? Give me a break! I can't even eat ham! What I had said was that I was making dinner for Mom at Mom's home earlier in the day. That did not mean I wasn't going to go there later on. They weren't planning dinner until the evening & they are a 15 minute drive away.

    Guess what...now I'm not going. I got a dinner invitation from friends.
    Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.

  15. #21

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    Good for you Sunnie. I would probably do the same.

    Gmyers, those people (even though they are family), would be off the list of people I speak to. Once they start their garbage, I would tell them that I am not listening to them & hang up. At least then they would really have something to complain/talk about.
    And yes, I would gladly admit to hanging up on them to anyone who asked. I would tell them why & if the next person started on the same garbage They would get the same treatment as the first person.
    I really don't allow fools/troublemakers to ruin my day/hour, whatever.
    My family knows this about me, DH is the same way. Our families know that we won't put up with their foolishness & they act accordingly.

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