Page 4 of 6 First 123456 Last
  1. #34
    sunniekiss's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    NEPA
    Posts
    1,940
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 555 Times in 354 Posts
    Not to disrespect anyone in this post but unless you experience this on a daily basis you have no clue about the stress you go through. Assisted living is expensive & not always an option. Currently my Mom lives in her own home but it is the constant stress she puts me through that can get exhausting. She got mad at me on Monday afternoon...whatever I am used to it...but my sister isn't. She tried calling Mom for 2 hours but Mom was having a temper tantrum so she wouldn't pick-up the phone. My sister called me in a panic. Told her to try calling at 9 because Mom will pick-up then because she knows if she doesn't answer by then & I have to drive up to check on her I will give her a time-out the next day meaning I won't stop by after work. My sister lives 20 blocks from Mom so there wasn't any reason she couldn't just get in her car & drive down to check-up on her. Nope...wait 2 hours and call me.
    Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.

  2. # ADS
    Circuit advertisement Caring for a sick Mom
    Join Date
    Always
    Location
    Advertising world
    Posts
    Many
     

  3. #35

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    1,593
    Thanks
    118
    Thanked 545 Times in 251 Posts
    All I can do is shake my head.......

  4. #36
    sunniekiss's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    NEPA
    Posts
    1,940
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 555 Times in 354 Posts
    She had chest pains Wednesday night but never told me until Thursday morning. She took Tylenol & tried going back to sleep.
    Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.

  5. #37
    pepperpot's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    exactly where I should be...
    Posts
    8,566
    Thanks
    4,402
    Thanked 3,793 Times in 2,027 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by sunniekiss View Post
    She had chest pains Wednesday night but never told me until Thursday morning. She took Tylenol & tried going back to sleep.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

  6. #38
    sunniekiss's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    NEPA
    Posts
    1,940
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 555 Times in 354 Posts
    Thanks pepper...I need that!
    Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.

  7. #39
    tngirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Out of Memphis!!
    Posts
    5,860
    Thanks
    500
    Thanked 1,926 Times in 860 Posts
    I have been through this situation. Over the years it was me that was always there for my mother. In the end I ended up being the "bad guy". This did not matter to me. The important part was that I was not going to have my mother with me for much longer. Did my mother anger me? Did my mother hurt my feelings? Did my mother stress me to no end? Yep, she sure did. I look at it this way, if I did not care and respect my mother then when my time comes my children would not care and respect me.
    It is the Right of the People to Alter or Abolish Government

  8. #40
    sunniekiss's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    NEPA
    Posts
    1,940
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 555 Times in 354 Posts
    *LOL* tngirl. My boys already told me they put a deposit on a room in a nursing home for the day after I retire. I love my Mom & so happy I still have her to make me crazy but let me tell you there are times...sigh...I call it Princess Syndrome. She has never worked a day in her life (ok being a SAHM IS a real job) I mean outside the home job, never wrote out a check in her life. I am sorry but I do have really, REALLY bad days at work even though I LOVE MY JOB & yes I can get cranky & short at times. What I don't need is a 2 hour tear fueled temper tantrum complete with calling & hanging up on me. I do have caller ID.
    Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.

  9. #41

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Santa Clarita, CA
    Posts
    7,330
    Thanks
    2,568
    Thanked 1,151 Times in 608 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by tngirl View Post
    I have been through this situation. Over the years it was me that was always there for my mother. In the end I ended up being the "bad guy". This did not matter to me. The important part was that I was not going to have my mother with me for much longer. Did my mother anger me? Did my mother hurt my feelings? Did my mother stress me to no end? Yep, she sure did. I look at it this way, if I did not care and respect my mother then when my time comes my children would not care and respect me.
    I do think there is so much truth in what you say. Our children learn by our examples. Even when they are grown, they see how we behave. My son-in-law is a wonderful man...but has the compassion of a single cell protazoa. He just doesn't even get it. But, he tries to do the right thing not because he inherently knows what's right, but because someone has showed him or told him.

    His mother is kind of flaky and very irresponsible. She drives my SIL absolutely crazy because he is a very precise person. So, he was being very intolerant of her behavior and ignored her most of the time. My daughter told him that he was teaching their children how they should treat her (their mother) when they are adults and she is older...and perhaps needing care. She asked him if that's what he wanted? That turned his behavior around quick. His mother still drives him crazy but he is trying to be more patient and tolerant of her.

    My husband and I have had to care for elderly parents. My husband, in particular, is carrying the bulk of that burden since he retired. (And, his brother wants nothing to do with his father.) My son has already made comments about what his responsibilities will be with hubby and I are older. He (and his sister) just know that they may need to be there for us.

    And...we've told them that if we begin acting like our parents, then they need to tell us to 'knock it off'...LOL!

    But, caring for elderly parents is just not easy...ever.
    Never argue with an idiot. It will bring you down to his level and he’ll win because of experience.

  10. #42

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    1,593
    Thanks
    118
    Thanked 545 Times in 251 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by tngirl View Post
    I have been through this situation. Over the years it was me that was always there for my mother. In the end I ended up being the "bad guy". This did not matter to me. The important part was that I was not going to have my mother with me for much longer. Did my mother anger me? Did my mother hurt my feelings? Did my mother stress me to no end? Yep, she sure did. I look at it this way, if I did not care and respect my mother then when my time comes my children would not care and respect me.
    Exactly!

  11. #43
    tngirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Out of Memphis!!
    Posts
    5,860
    Thanks
    500
    Thanked 1,926 Times in 860 Posts
    I loved my mother, plain and simple. Was she the perfect mother? No, but she was my mother and I still miss her terribly.
    It is the Right of the People to Alter or Abolish Government

  12. #44
    baragabrat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    1,416
    Thanks
    452
    Thanked 599 Times in 413 Posts
    I honestly don't know what's worse, having to deal with difficult aging mothers as many of you do or never having had a mother to raise me at all. Years ago, my reply to the thread would have something along the line of, "well, at least you have a mother." It's never that cut and dried. I wish the best for each of you having to deal with an aging mom and pray that you will ultimately be blessed in your life for your sacrifice today.
    What Goes Around, Comes Around

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Log in

Log in