Thread: Holidays and families

Ahh, the holidays, the best of times, the worst of times.

I love the holidays AFTER January 2nd.

Last Christmas Eve my Mom threw a classic "hissy fit" because my sister wasn't having dinner until 6:00PM & that is too late for Mom. Mind you I had to take her to church for 5 & we didn't get out until 6 so what was the big deal.

This year my sister is having Thanksgiving but I am clueless as to who is having Chirstmas Eve/Christmas Day. My sister is having her hip replaced the beginning of December. Mom is 85 & it is too much for her to do and I know I am not physically able to do it this year.

Well this year I am in a world of sh*t because I am not attending my Grandfather's Thanksgiving dinner. MInd you there are over 100 people that go....so in all reality I won't be missed. But dh does not get home from work until 7:30 am and the feast is at noon.....its about a half hour away, so that does not leave a lot a sleep time for him if we go. PLUS my Nana is having Chemo so she cannot be around that many people, so I told him I was staying home so that provided my kids are well (no sniffles) then we will eat with her that day.

No matter what someone will not be happy, so I have long since quit trying to please everyone else and just try to live my life the best I can!

Yep my dh and I are on his mom's schit list because we usually go over there for dinner. Well this year they are having it with aunts and uncles etc. at a center in the next town. And we have to do that once a year anyway its called a reunion. So we are not going. That to us is not a family gathering. We barely know these people and so we decided not to go. Its not sitting well with her. Besides I have not gone to my sides for probably 10 years for thanksgiving!

I really want to give both my family and dh's the 2 finger salute and hibernate until Jan 2nd.. I am so sick of having to go here and there and everywhere when everyone knows I effing hate this time of year.. I hate it with a passion and this year it's x10 But noooOOooo

I just want to be left alone.

Originally Posted by ElleGee

I really want to give both my family and dh's the 2 finger salute and hibernate until Jan 2nd.. I am so sick of having to go here and there and everywhere when everyone knows I effing hate this time of year.. I hate it with a passion and this year it's x10 But noooOOooo

I just want to be left alone.

I thought I was the only one who felt that way. I swear if I hear one jingle bell or one HOHOHO before the 24th I am about to go ballastic.

I normally make batches of cookies this year but wasn't planning on this year. For one thing the ingredients are so expensive, I am sick, & my KitchenMaid mixer broke so no cookies this year.
My boss mentioned to one of our subs on friday that the Monday after Thanksgiving that there will be homemade cookies in the office & I said I hope your g/f is making them b/c I AM NOT!

BAHHH HUMBUG!

Okay...I'm in the minority here because I love the holidays and our family has worked out a wonderful solution.

My husband and I experienced such turmoil with splitting time with our own parents when our children were little. So we were determined not to make our own children suffer the same thing when they grew up.

First of all, it is important for older parents to understand that when their children are grown with families of their own, that they need to develop their own traditions! And that may NOT mean always going to grandma's house for the holidays!!! As much as possible, I think it is wonderful for little children to wake up in their own home to discover that Santa has been there. If that means that a Bob and I have to wake up early so that we can be there to see it, then so be it!

Fortunately, we all live relatively close and I don't have to share my daughter and her family too much. My SIL only has his mother and she just joins all our family gatherings...whether it is at my home or my daughter's home.

With my son...his wife is part of a large, loving family. They are very close. So...it was decided when they first got married that they would spend Easter with us and Thanksgiving with her family. No hassles...we all know what to expect. And while it would be great if they were with us for all holidays, I realize that it wouldn't be fair. Plus..as much as my DIL loves my husband and me, she loves her own family more!

As for Christmas...I came up with a wonderful solution. We were going back and forth with the 'you spend Christmas Eve here and Christmas Day there, etc." Well...our close family has gotten much smaller because Bob and I only have his dad to worry about and he would just as soon ignore the holidays. So...I asked my DIL how her family would feel if Bob and I, plus my daughter and her family, just joined her family for Christmas dinner!!! It has worked out wonderfully and has become our new tradition!

As an aside, Shelly has a wonderful family that we have known for years. We all attended the same church and we get along really well with her parents, grandparents, cousins, etc. This situation is unique to our group...but it worked out well.

But, the main thing was to come up with a solution of compromise as well as an understanding that ALL of us have expectations, time constraints, and desires of where we want to be.