The stand off......

**pepperpot** · 09-05-2009, 08:22 PM

Do you know the door is still off the hinges....

She is so stubborn.....she knows what she has to do....she just won't do it....yet.

**Advertisement** · 09-05-2009 08:22 PM

**pepperpot** · 09-05-2009, 08:24 PM

Originally Posted by stresseater

If the oldest DD is any indication the answer is NO!

Originally Posted by ilovecats

It grows back,just a little grayer and more brittle.

Thanks for the warm, kind and encouraging words ladies.....

**ilovecats** · 09-05-2009, 08:31 PM

Originally Posted by pepperpot

Do you know the door is still off the hinges....

She is so stubborn.....she knows what she has to do....she just won't do it....yet.

It is just the age,I don't even think she can help it.

My older dd did a lot of the things my 14 yr old is doing now,she sees now how silly it was.I think once they get out of high school they realize what they thought was "oh so important"really isn't.You just have to refrain from killing her before she sees the light and you will both be fine.

**queenangie** · 09-05-2009, 11:07 PM

I feel your pain! Been there, done that!

Know you know why Miss Clairol is your best friend - teenagers give a mom gray hair!
Even the good ones.

Have survived the teenaged years w/ 2 sons and have the gray hair to prove it.....
except my friend comes and washes it away! LOL!

You are doing the right thing - bedroom door off the hinges. We went through that too,
and it is effective.

And limiting the TV stations is also a good tool for parents to use.

We also knew to choose our battles with the teens.
Hair was never an issue as long as it was clean and out of the eyes.
The green & blue hair dye for them didn't bother me.
The mohawk one summer for 2 months really set my teeth on edge,
but I knew better than to comment on it.
An anniversary for the grandparents came up and DS#2 knew it was time to
change hair styles......he was ready anyway.
Now at 20, 23 they both have normal hair styles.

Just remember, as difficult as it is, reigning in a 13 yo is much easier than trying to wait until the child turns 16.

You will live through this, my friend.

**luvcub** · 09-06-2009, 05:45 AM

Wow,my kids drove me mad when they were in their teens. The boys were the worst,always spattn back and forth,one day I had enough,said if you want to talk trash to each other,threaten each other,put the words where your mouth is,so they duked it out,after about 15 minutes of me wringing my hands,and monitering,I screamed me head off,and they stopped,bloo0dy lip,bruises,30 minutes later they were best friends again,30 minutes later I had 2 valium,These nasty fights occured about 3 times from the age of 12 to 17,now in their 20s,the love between these boys is very strong.
One time my son Dustin was visiting his friends down the street,he was about 8,about 2 hours later,the kid he went to visit,his granpa came to our house and told me a bunch of tiny collectable hot wheels came up missing,all of them were like the 1st 25 ever made,now Dustin had some learning disabilities,to a small amount,so knowing how my son would not take me serious,I had to get a strategy,so I get him home,confront him with the man standing there,he pulls out the tiny little cars from all his pockets,now Im fuming,he knows now he is busted,so knowing I had to nip this in the butt right now,you ready for this? I went into the house,and called the cops,spoke to a very nice policeman,had them come with the lights on and siren going,he came onto my porch with all my sons friends watching from the front yard,put handcuffs on him,read him his rights,with a few words missing,he then led him to the back of the cop car,he was crying his eyes out,I had my hand over his my mouth,sorry to say,but a tiny grin was there,for I knew this was going to be a hard lesson to learn,the policeman,loaded him up
and left,at that point,5 of the kids in the yard were scared to death,2 ran home crying.
The policeman had him for about 15 minutes,going around and around the block,talking to him,as he was a father to 2 boys also,after the talk he was released to me,I never had another problem with him again in that way,yes it was a sad thing to do on my part,but when I was young I had different answers to problems that arose,I had to be creative.Today,he barely remembers it. Just know,that all the bad things you feel at the time will blow away in the breeze,and come back for heart felt memories over the yrs,a few tears to share with your kids when they grow up and lots of laughter to share with grandkids to come,getting their will be a rough ride,but in the end,worth it all,good luck..

**pepperpot** · 11-09-2009, 07:06 AM

I feel like I'm trying to nail jello to the wall.....

What a horrible weekend. DH worked so I did all the running around plus whatever I usually do. I've really had it. For months we've been in a battle over which high school to go to. I feel like I'm being under-minded at every turn...... A few weeks ago my DH made the comment in front of my DD that if we 'force' her to go to a school she doesn't want, she'd purposely not do well to spite us.

Yes, he said this in front of DD....what an ass.

So yesterday, I took her shopping to look for some dresses. She tried a few on and there was one that was stunning. She didn't like it. I said, "look how terrific it looks on you". She said, "You can buy it but I just won't wear it." It just broke my heart, right there. The shopping abruptly ended and everything went back on the rack.

I told her she could go to whatever school she wanted, I'm done.

It just got progressively worse as the night went on. Of course, DH wasn't much help, he entertains this crap....I'm just so done fighting....for what? They can all go to hell in a hand-basket.

And....I took back all my curling irons and hair straighteners this morning too. And also gave notice to leave my makeup alone as well. More fool me to let her keep disrespecting me and keep giving in and giving out.....she's too darn stubborn for her own good and I'm just tired of fighting this frickin' battle.

**candygirl** · 11-09-2009, 08:28 AM

I can feel your pain, I've been there

The worst thing you can do is give in to her , " Stand Your Ground ", when she see that you won't put up with her crap ,she'll back off.

Nip it now or it will only get worst.

Good Luck

**pepperpot** · 11-09-2009, 08:52 AM

Thanks....I just could really use my mom right now.....

**LunaChick** · 11-09-2009, 09:32 AM

**krisharry** · 11-09-2009, 10:31 AM

Awww, hang in there pp. I was a complete witch to my mom from 13-17. She ruined my life, I hate you, everything I could do to go against her. I was a good kid but just stubborn and didn't want to hear it from her. Then all of a sudden something happened and poof witch no more. IDK what it was but good luck and stay strong. These years will not last forever.

**sunniekiss** · 11-09-2009, 11:04 AM

Originally Posted by pepperpot

...I really don't like teenagers...especially my own.....can someone take them @ 13 and give them back @20?

You really think 20's are any better??? *LOL* The 20's mean clubbing & drinking & the dreaded college expenses. FASA forms alone will turn your hair grey.

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