Thread: What comes to mind when you think of Utah?

Mormons, right? And all us mormons have a zillion kids, and are sugary sweet and (supposedly) perfect. Whatever.
Utah has changed. There has always been other religions here, and in the past few years, the number of non-mormons has increased.
What I'm getting at is my sister. She keeps making these little comments. We grew up active mormons in southern California. She thinks all Utah mormons are stuck up and cliquish and hate outsiders. So now because I've lived in Utah for 4 years, I'm becoming one of "them". You can find stuck up, cliquish, outsider-hating people anywhere.
The other day she was telling me how her husband wants to move here. But then she said she would never live here because there are too many mormons. Her theory has always been that because everyone here is mormon, there is no one to set an example to and we've let our standards go a little.
Today, we were talking about having babies, and I mentioned how we stay in the hospital 2 days (as opposed to one in other areas). She said that's because we all have 10 kids and we need to rest.
What's her problem? She goes to church every week and is the choir director for her ward. I wouldn't say she's active, she's just doing it for show. Aside from weddings, she has not been back to the temple. Her poor husband doesn't go to try to keep some peace with her.
Her little snide comments hurt, but I don't say anything because I don't want to open that can of worms. I already know what she will say anyway. Trying to talk to her from this far away will do no good, she can always log off or hang up. I just had to get this out because it bothered me, and when I talk to DH about her, it's always the same thing (we both feel the same way about her). So thanks for letting me get this out.

Well I first thought of Donnie and Marie and then Mormons. lol When I was about 12 years old there was a woman that lived down the street from us and she was Mormon. Me and another girl from the neighborhood used to go over to her house sometimes and she would tell us these stories about how she saw ghosts and that to make them leave she would say get out of here in the name of Jesus Christ. I believe there are spirits so I'm not saying that she was making it up but sometimes it seemed a little far fetched. She ended up divorcing her husband because he wanted to have an open marriage and she did not want to live that way. I hope you can work things out with your sister and that she will be more understanding.

I grew up Mormon in Utah. I can understand your sister's concerns, but she's overexaggerating and generalizing. It can depend on where in Utah you are. I grew up in Utah Valley (Provo) which was over 90% LDS at the time. When any religion is that prevalent it becomes a culture and you get people of all types. It's hard to realize members you know have serious problems with sin or get arrested. It was hard for me as a teen.
I moved to Salt Lake City for college and it was actually a lot better for me. Salt Lake City is less than half LDS. You still know plenty of members but it matters more because you can't assume everyone is a member.
My grandparents moved to Fillmore, Utah and could never fit in because of the cliques. They had much better luck in Vernal.
I now live in Cheyenne, Wyoming and Mormons are less than 10% of the population here. It has its own problems. Most Nonmormons in Utah are fairly well informed about how the LDS church functions. Here, you still meet people who think we kidnap virgins to take to the temple and one jumped out into the Great Salt Lake and swam to get away (LOL it's over 10 miles from the temple to the shore of the lake!) But it's not as bad here for misinformation as it was in Missouri. Some people honestly believe we have horns and wondered where mine had gone.
Anyway, Good luck!

When I think of Utah I think of some of the dearest friends we've ever had. My husband was stationed in WA state and we met this couple from the ship. Over time we got to know each other and became friends. They are LDS. They would stop by our house. They were never snooty nor did they try to convert us. To this day we can call them and if they can help with our problem they do. We try to do the same. We've been friends for about 25 years now. We got to see him when he was going to a school for his work about a month ago in the midwest. It was like we had never been apart.

I really think she is saying stuff like that because she has guilt. She thinks that if she moves to a place with a bunch of Mormons, she can't goof off and not have them wagging their fingers behind her back. I don't think anyone would do that, but when you know better and still do certain things, it can seem like everyone is judging you. She knows what she should be doing, and has all kinds of excuses why she can't.

Whatever her problem is, well, it's her problem. Besides, she is continuing to look for houses in Utah.

Originally Posted by 1tiredmom

i too think of mormans & the osmonds-i also think of jerry springer & the time he had that man on w/ all the wives and kids (a few of his wives were sisters)-i just have always been curious ;do yall really have that many kids & the male has all these wives(sp?) and they all get along? lord knows i'm not being smart or anything just wondering-- i'm catholic and we have enough problems of our own

That was Tom Green and he has had more wives then I have fingers and toes. He has quite a few divorces in there. He is in jail now because one of his wives bore him a child just a few months after she became legally old enough to have that kind of relationship (although when she conceived that child...I think she was 14). They are not Mormons. When the government outlawed poligamy in the 1890's (I think that's when it was), so did the church. Those that disagreed were excommunicated, and started their own fundamentalist branch. My beef with the poligamists is that the wives usually don't work, and how can any man provide for 30+ children plus a handful of wives all on his own? They were after Tom Green for welfare fraud too - his wives claimed they were divorced to receive it (by law he's only married to one, but is married to the others spiritually). I think it's awful, those kids shouldn't have to go without, but for a family to obtain assistance by illegal means because of thier illegal lifestyle is just wrong.