I Am Dreading Christmas

[Barbi_Route66]

Normally, I love this time of year but this year has been an emotional roller coaster for me. For the first time in my life, I'm dreading Christmas.

My mom passed away on September 4 of this year. I miss her so much. Mom had heart valve replacement surgery. The surgery itself went fine but she had other complications. She was 71. When the doctors told us that things weren't looking good, we told them to just make her as comfortable as possible; we didn't want her to be in pain. We requested for a (Catholic) priest to give her the last rites. After the priest came, all of the family got to say our good byes. Even though mom was asleep, I told her that I loved her so much & that if it was time for her to go, that it was okay for her to see daddy (my dad passed away 11 years ago). We (my brother, sister, hubby, sister in law, cousin, aunt & uncle...my mom's siblings & I) were with her when she passed away.

I just feel so lost since mom is gone. I have been crying nearly every day for the past week. You see, mom loved this time of year. I think that's why I've been feeling this way, just dreading the holidays. I realize that everyone has a day to leave this world & I wouldn't want my mom to suffer with poor health anymore. The first Christmas without a person you love is always the toughest.

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[bribella]

I am sorry you are going through this especially at this time of the year. HUGS

[Amyjean]

A big hug to you. Your mom knew that you loved her and she will always be with you in spirit, especially during this time of year that she loved so much. She was surrounded by the love of her family and left with peace in her heart. She knew that you were there even if she was sleeping. The holidays are a hard time for lots of people and especially for those who have lost a loved one. Three months is not a lot of time to grieve. Sometimes people expect others to be happy during Christmas but rather than put on a smile for others, try to think about the happy memories you had with your mom. Even through the tears, you might come up with a real smile.

My dad passed away in March at the age of 79 and I missed him terribly too. This Christmas won't be the same without him either. It's never a good time to say goodbye to loved one, is it?

Much peace to you,

Amy

[queenangie]

It's normal to grieve after the death of a parent or other loved one.
These things take time.

Life still continues for the rest of the world though.

Look through your photo albums, or video tapes of your
previous happy holiday times including your loved ones.
Maybe that will help.

Sending warm hugs & prayers your direction.

[june72]

Barbi,
I'm very sorry to hear about your mom. I can say I know exactly what you are going thru. You see my mommy also just passed away. Nov. 20, 2004. Three of my sisters and I along with my step dad and four of my aunts was with her. I was holding her hand. My mom just turned 66 on Nov. 15. I am like you I miss her so much. This is such a rough time of year after goin thru this. Christmas dinner is at my house and I am dreading it so bad. We wanted to go on and have it because mommy would want us to. You take care and God Bless You and confort you! If you need to talk you can email me anytime. My email address is [email protected]

[DAVESBABYDOLL]

Sadly, your mom has passed,but rejoice in her spirit,rejoice in the Christmas spirit she so loved.Keep her traditions alive for yourself and your family...she will never be away from you,she lives within you,within your mind and your heart.

(((hugs)))

[tsquared]

Sadly, your mom has passed,but rejoice in her spirit,rejoice in the Christmas spirit she so loved.Keep her traditions alive for yourself and your family...she will never be away from you,she lives within you,within your mind and your heart.

(((hugs)))

Very well said

[wubbywa]

I agree also, celebrate the holiday for her and yourself. Think of how sad she would be to see you hurt so bad. I know it is easy for me to say because I am not in your shoes. God Bless You.

[shc360]

I know the lost you must feel especially during the holidays and my heart goes out to you. Your mother is with you every day now in everything you do and i know that doesnt seem enough when you loved her so much. I lost my mother 3 years ago last month and to this day i stilll miss her with all my heart and wish i had that one last day with her. I also lost my father 10 years ago and miss him just as much and to make life much lonlier i lost my brother who was 39, 7 yeas ago and lost my sister who was 40 last year. Life changes so much when you lose a loved one but just keep thier spirits and memories in your heart and it will help you through the hard time. Dont be afraid to talk to your mom even though she isnt on here, she will hear every word that you say and she will be by your side every step of the way.

[twinkiesmom]

{{{Barbi)))

[Jaidness]

((((((((((((((((((((((Barbi)))))))))))))))))))