Can I trade him in for a new model?(long vent)

**bribella** · 08-10-2004, 07:03 AM

Grr! Sometimes I really dislike my DH to the point that I just wish he would go away(is that bad?) . This morning he gets all ticked off at me because he had gotten a speeding ticket while we still lived in MN and all he had to do was pay the ticket due Aug.11th. Well tomorrow is the 11th and he asked me if I mailed it for him, ummm no, it's your ticket, your a big boy.

So he gets all bent out of shape over it and starts getting on my case about why didn't I do it. I told him that he has had since June to take care of it. He could have paid it before we left MN as we lived up the street from the courthouse. He told me that he has no time to do that as he has to work and I dont.

It'll probably take about 4 days for it to get there now. The post office is open on saturdays and there are lots of mailboxes ect. around he could have taken care of it, but didn't. And it is not like he works 24/7, he is able to find the time to go fishing and do whatever else he wants to do.

I am stuck at home with the 3 kids and no vehicle right now because we sold his truck before we moved and he has been using my van to go to work. He thinks that I should pack up the kids and walk 2 miles or so to go get the money order and then walk to the post office wherever the heck that is.

He complains what do you do all day besides sit on your computer? I work all day and you do nothing. YEAH RIGHT!!!!! He should try taking care of a 5yr old, 2 and 1 yr old all day and night and then tell me that I do nothing.
He complained that the house isn't spotless when he comes home so therefore I must not be doing anything all day.

HELLO!! We have 3 small children and I vacumn 2x aday (at least), mop the floor at least 1x, I wash and fold laundry all day, I cook , and wash the dishes by hand at least 3x a day. I am not going to run around after them every minute they are awake picking up everything they may lay on the floor it is pointless I tell him. Like shoveling snow while it is snowing as soon as you pick it up there is more there in the same place. I start cleaning at 8 am and I dont usually stop until 3pm, should I spend my every waking minute cleaning?

He doesn't do a darn thing around home~ I take out the garbage to the street on pick up day, I work in the yard, he won't even mow the grass. His reason is that he has to work to support us and on his days off he wants to relax. Fine, I understand that you work and I appreciate that you work so hard so I can stay home with the kids but you can still help out. Other men do things around the house on their days off why can't you? When do I get some time off?

I love him to death but I cant stand the fact that he thinks that because he goes to work that he shouldn't have to do anything else. I do absolutely everything for this man with the exception of him going to work and wiping his behind

What does he do for me besides go to work? NOTHING!!!!

**Advertisement** · 08-10-2004 07:03 AM

**msshannon** · 08-10-2004, 07:20 AM

I hear ya girl!!! I am this same point in my relationship with my hubby and it's the SAME situation except he mows the lawn and when I nag, he takes out the trash, but I have to stay on top of it to get him to do that...if I have to do it, I leave it in his car

I have an 8 year old and a 3 year old that bicker and fight all day and I thought I had my hands full!...but you, you definately have your hands full!!! I do NOT envy you at all..lol

I tell my hubby the same thing...I tell him he works for me and our boys but that's all...I tell him it's not that I don't love him for that, but it takes more than that to keep relationships healthy...our relationship and his relationship with the kids. He's very good(probably more so than I) at playing with the boys...that's the first thing he does when he gets home, they'll play until it's bedtime. I get whatever energy is left over..lol

Sounds like you need to get away or have him take the kids for the day, if that is possible...this helps me regroup and have some time to myself...he does this quite a bit so I have time for cleaning, gardening, cooking, or even bathing in peace...something I'm sure you probably don't get to do very often..lol

Don't feel alltogether bad about wishing he'd leave...I often wish I could leave..lol...or wish I had money for a nanny

**Angelseyes28** · 08-10-2004, 07:20 AM

I'm sorry he is giving you such a hard time. All I can say is it sounds like he is spoiled.

**rlynn411** · 08-10-2004, 07:31 AM

If he thinks you do nothing all day.... do exactly that for a day. Then when he come home and sees dishes sitting in the sink, laundry piling up, no dinner etc. and he ask what did you do all day you can say NOTHING..... let him see what NOTHING looks like and see what he has to say.

My DH gets like that every now and again. Granted our kids are older than yours but they bring their friends in the house in packs and it doesn't take all that long for the house to look like an explosion happened! And until school starts again I'm officially over trying to keep ahead of their messes.

**bribella** · 08-10-2004, 07:43 AM

Originally Posted by msshannon

I hear ya girl!!! I am this same point in my relationship with my hubby and it's the SAME situation except he mows the lawn and when I nag, he takes out the trash, but I have to stay on top of it to get him to do that...if I have to do it, I leave it in his car

I have an 8 year old and a 3 year old that bicker and fight all day and I thought I had my hands full!...but you, you definately have your hands full!!! I do NOT envy you at all..lol

I tell my hubby the same thing...I tell him he works for me and our boys but that's all...I tell him it's not that I don't love him for that, but it takes more than that to keep relationships healthy...our relationship and his relationship with the kids. He's very good(probably more so than I) at playing with the boys...that's the first thing he does when he gets home, they'll play until it's bedtime. I get whatever energy is left over..lol

Sounds like you need to get away or have him take the kids for the day, if that is possible...this helps me regroup and have some time to myself...he does this quite a bit so I have time for cleaning, gardening, cooking, or even bathing in peace...something I'm sure you probably don't get to do very often..lol

Don't feel alltogether bad about wishing he'd leave...I often wish I could leave..lol...or wish I had money for a nanny

Me leave without at least one child with me? Yeah right! If I do go somewhere I have to at least take my 1yr old, because he says that she will cry and scream the whole time I am gone and he doesnt want to deal with it. I tell him that he watched all 3 of the kids while I would go to work at night and he seemed to do all right. His response: you were making money now your'e just spending money. WHATEVER!!!! I don't have any friends that I can go visit as I only have 2 friends and 1 just moved to Oregon and the other lives a ways from me and I would need to take the ferry over to the otherside and then drive quite a ways and with only 1 vehicle right now that would be difficult to do. But it is nice to dream.

**JWWB2000** · 08-10-2004, 07:50 AM

Sounds like he needs a good wakeup call. If you can do this and stand it try and do absolutely nothing for a day or two and see what it is like when you actually do not do anything but "play" on the computer. See his reaction then. He would then realize what you actually do and not be such a oger about him working and you not.

**bribella** · 08-10-2004, 07:59 AM

My plans exactly , when he comes home and sees that nothing has been done with the exception of dinner I'll tell him this: How do you expect me to have time to clean when I have all this internet surfing to do? LoL!

**JWWB2000** · 08-10-2004, 08:00 AM

Don't even fix dinner......say you were too busy with the internet

**DBackFan** · 08-10-2004, 08:05 AM

Gosh I feel bad for those of you with husbands like that. I have almost the opposite problem. My husband I both work full time but his is 12 hr days and 6 days a week and mine is just the normal 40. He does WAAAY more than me around the house. Sometimes I think he does it to make me feel guiltier by ever goin online..lol He's a great hubby.

**wubbywa** · 08-10-2004, 08:08 AM

Well instead of punishing yourself by not doing anything and having to do 2-3 days of catch up you could try this, dont wash his clothes,dishes,clean his bathroom,anything that is something of his. Then in a day or so it builds up and maybe he will have to rethink about his comment.

**JWWB2000** · 08-10-2004, 08:32 AM

Originally Posted by wubbywa

Well instead of punishing yourself by not doing anything and having to do 2-3 days of catch up you could try this, dont wash his clothes,dishes,clean his bathroom,anything that is something of his. Then in a day or so it builds up and maybe he will have to rethink about his comment.

That is a better idea!!!!

Thread: Can I trade him in for a new model?(long vent)

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