Thread: Why everyone should start carrying $2 bills!

THE $2.00 BILL I TRIED TO SPEND:



IF YOU'RE AS OLD AS I AM, THIS IS A RIOT!

I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public. The younger generation doesn't even know they exist!

STORY: On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. I have a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: 'Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.'

Server: 'That'll be $1.04. Eat in?'

Me: 'No, it's to go.' At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server: 'Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back.'

He goes to talk to his manager still within my earshot. The manager is about 22 years old. The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server: 'Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?'

Manager: 'No. A what?'

Server: 'A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me...'

Manager: 'Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill.'

Server: 'Yeah, thought so.'

He comes back to me and says, 'We don't take these. Do you have anything else?'

Me: 'Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?

Server: 'I don't know.'

Me: 'See here where it says legal tender?'

Server: 'Yeah.'

Me: 'So, why won't you take it?'

Server: 'Well, hang on a sec.'

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, 'He says I have to take it.'

Manager: 'Doesn't he have anything else?'

Server: 'Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change.

Manager: 'I'm not opening the safe with him in here.'

Server: 'What should I do?'

Manager: 'Tell him to come back later when he has real money.'

Server: 'I can't tell him that! You tell him.'

Manager: 'Just tell him.'

Server: 'No way! This is weird. I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says, 'I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night.'

Me: 'It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill.'

Manager: 'We don't take those, either.'

Me: 'Why not?'

Manager: 'I think you know why.'

Me: 'No really, tell me why.'

Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'

Me: 'Excuse me?'

Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'

Me: 'What on earth for?'

Manager: 'Please, sir..'

Me: 'Uh, go ahead, call them.'

Manager: 'Would you please just leave?'

Me: 'No.'

Manager: 'Fine -- have it your way then.'

Me: 'Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?'

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.

A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in : 'Yeah, Mike, what's up?'

Manager (whispering): 'This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.'

Guard: 'No kidding! What?'

Manager: 'Get this. A two dollar bill.'

Guard (incredulous): 'Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?'

Manager: 'I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.'

Guard: 'Oh, so the fifty's fake!'

Manager: 'No, the two dollar bill is.'

Guard: 'Why would he fake a two dollar bill?'

Manager : 'I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?'

Guard: 'Yeah.'

Security Guard walks over to me and......
Guard: 'Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use.'

Me: 'Uh, no.'

Guard: 'Lemme see 'em.'

Me: 'Why?'

Guard: 'Do you want me to get the cops in here?'

At this point I'm ready to say, 'Sure, please!' but I want to eat, so I say, 'I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says, 'Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?'

Manager: 'It's fake.'

Guard: 'It doesn't look fake to me.'

Manager: 'But it's a two dollar bill.'

Guard: 'Yeah? '

Manager: 'Well, there's no such thing, is there?'

The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue and is - in fact - an idiot.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too. Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff.

Just think... those two are of the age to be voting!!!

NOW do you understand why and how Obama got a 2nd term?