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    3lilpigs's Avatar
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    Does this make sense to you??

    The daughter of my parents' neighbor, got married 3 yrs ago. I think it was just by justice of the peace or something like that. They had no reception then, but are having one now.

    It's a ''Celebration of Marriage'' reception. Invites sent out, hall rented, etc.....

    Does that make sense to you?

    Should my parents be expected to take a gift??

    Just seems odd to me to wait so long for something like that.

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    wobblypops's Avatar
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    Maybe they didn't have the funds to do something earlier. I wouldn't take a present but I would give them a gift card or some cash in a card. Will it be on their anniversary?
    FOR EVERY LAW THAT IS PASSED, WE LOSE A LITTLE BIT MORE OF OUR FREEDOM.

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    3lilpigs's Avatar
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    I'm not sure if it is or not. I don't think so.

    It just seems weird to me because lately my parents are getting invited to things of ''their friends kids'', and it seems like presents are always involved.

    Just a few weeks ago, my mom was invited to a baby shower of a friends daughter, that we haven't seen in over 25 yrs! And it was the daughters 3rd baby!!!!

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    pepperpot's Avatar
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    If you accept an invitation to a function, I would expect to be giving a gift of some sort.

    Now, if you think you are only being invited because they want a gift, you may already have other plans for that day.

    Yes, 3 years after a marriage and for a 3rd baby.....odd....unless extenuating circumstances.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

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    I know there is etiquette for certain things but I only want give a gift when I actually want to give. I hate being required to give but there are some situations where one must do what is expected.
    What Goes Around, Comes Around

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    If they attend then I think they are obligated to take a gift. That being said I'm with Pepperpot, I would be busy that day. If your parents aren't close to the friend's kids then I think it is tacky for the kids for inviting them. My daughter is getting married in April and I'm not inviting my parent's (who are no longer living) friends. It is her wedding and her guests. To tell you the truth it seems really strange they are having a reception three years after getting married.

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    wobblypops's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by baragabrat View Post
    I know there is etiquette for certain things but I only want give a gift when I actually want to give. I hate being required to give but there are some situations where one must do what is expected.
    That's why you will never see me saying I am going to someone's wedding, birthday party etc etc etc. I don't like that kind of thing. When I invite people over to my place I never allow them to bring a thing except their own beverages. I always make so much food that we are all ready to explode!
    FOR EVERY LAW THAT IS PASSED, WE LOSE A LITTLE BIT MORE OF OUR FREEDOM.

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    SLance68's Avatar
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    Wedding reception 3 years later and baby shower for 3rd child. That would be the definition of tacky and I would be busy that night.

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    pepperpot's Avatar
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    Never go empty handed....that's what I was brought with...whether it be a birthday party, etc. or just an invite to come over for some coffee...never go empty handed. It's not that it's required, but it is good etiquette and a show of appreciation on your* part. (*your=the attendee) It's more of a reflection of who YOU are than what THEY "require" of you.

    *Not aimed at anyone in particular, just sayin'

    I also just want to add. There are times when I have thrown parties for occasions and wanted people to show up because I wanted them there (to celebrate, not for gifts). I assumed they would bring a gift although I don't expect anything lavish...no matter how lavish an occasion I planned. Does that make sense?
    Last edited by pepperpot; 02-16-2013 at 10:39 AM.
    Mrs Pepperpot is a lady who always copes with the tricky situations that she finds herself in....

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    Jolie Rouge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 3lilpigs View Post
    The daughter of my parents' neighbor, got married 3 yrs ago. I think it was just by justice of the peace or something like that. They had no reception then, but are having one now.

    It's a ''Celebration of Marriage'' reception. Invites sent out, hall rented, etc.....

    Does that make sense to you?

    Should my parents be expected to take a gift??

    Just seems odd to me to wait so long for something like that.
    Was one of them in the Military ? Maybe recovering from along term illness or caring for someone who was ?? That is the only reason I can come up with for that...

    My nephew was in the Navy - got married overseas - of course no one could make the ceremony. When he was out of the Service and came home with his Bride, they had been married two years and had a child... we threw them a reception. It is a big family and many had not seen J in years nor meet Liza and they had a small wedding. No gifts... but this is the South, so everyone brought something anway.

    Wedding reception 3 years later and baby shower for 3rd child. That would be the definition of tacky and I would be busy that night.
    Tacky ? one of the cousins threw a lavish 50th Anniversary party for her parents, catered food, rented hall, registared gifts ... only problem was her parents were BOTH dead. Her mother died in the 80's, her father died about five years prior to the "party" A Golden Wedding Anniversary is to celebrate that a couple has remained wedded ( even if not blissfully ) for 50 years. If it had been done as a "remeberance" kinda of thing ... or the gift to be donated to charity ... but if was just creepy. One of my sisters "accidently" planned her sons' birthday party on the same day .... giving all of us a reason to be elsewhere.
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

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    wobblypops's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pepperpot View Post
    Never go empty handed....that's what I was brought with...whether it be a birthday party, etc. or just an invite to come over for some coffee...never go empty handed. It's not that it's required, but it is good etiquette and a show of appreciation on your* part. (*your=the attendee) It's more of a reflection of who YOU are than what THEY "require" of you.

    *Not aimed at anyone in particular, just sayin'

    I also just want to add. There are times when I have thrown parties for occasions and wanted people to show up because I wanted them there (to celebrate, not for gifts). I assumed they would bring a gift although I don't expect anything lavish...no matter how lavish an occasion I planned. Does that make sense?
    Before I became a loner I would throw all kinds of get-to-gethers & only a few people would bring something no matter what I would say. Sometimes it was a bottle of wine that I would keep for myself, for a later time or other small tokens. I have a couple that down Thanksgiving with us & they do not know how to cook but always insist on bringing something so they bring up a pie made by an Amish market & I make the homemade whipped cream. I also ask to borrow a real tablecloth for that day so they feel like they are helping out. It makes them feel good about eating with me for the past 12 or 13 years & I am not out to making them feel like moochers.
    FOR EVERY LAW THAT IS PASSED, WE LOSE A LITTLE BIT MORE OF OUR FREEDOM.

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