Thread: Last day of school for my senior, but she also is nasty

Originally Posted by krisharry

You have been posting about your kids for years, pigsy rooms, attitude, etc. You allow the behavior so why complain about it?

Boy. It must be official. I have been off this site for months and the moment I return you and your posse have to "HUNT" me down to cut me down to "size". Don't you have anything better to do?

Really the defiance of an 18 yo is normal but think it is her resposibility to be an adult like she states she is but she doesn't act like. Thus she is not ready for the "real" world. She knows my rules. But chose to blame MOTHER for her irresponsibility this morning. Thus, we searched her room since the brace was missing and she was being nasty to all around. She knows this is not tolerated and will not be allowed. She also knows I am thisclose to serving her eviction papers to make it official that she is out of here if her behavior doesn't improve. JUST LIKE in the "real" world. I will from now on act as if I am her landlord and if rules are broken...she is evicted. I did my job by raising her to 18 years old and graduated from high school.

Originally Posted by krisharry

ssdd.

My life in a nut shell.....

Wow, seems as if some of you treat your kids like they're juvenile delinquents. Sorry they're so bad that you have to take such mean and extreme measures.

The first thing that came to my mind is that your grad is very stressed and worried about graduating and leaving what she's always known....whether it's to go to college or go to work, she knows she's leaving mom & dad and the security of her home. So she takes it out on the ones she loves, just like we all do in certain situations. I'm not excusing her, just understanding.

Folks, we only have our kids for such a short time that I think we all should be a little more loving and tolerant. Many of you brag about how severe you are with your kids and say you "would never allow" certain behaviors from your kids. Well, it just goes with the age and we all as parents have to deal with the same things. Regardless of how many times Kidzpca has posted same things (I haven't read all the other posts so I don't know what has been posted), it's still a problem and if we can't come here to share our frustration with others who have been through the same things, then what good is this forum?

You all say to come here and share and where is everyone & "we're here for you", etc. and yet you sit back judge as you do and make sarcastic comments. What bull. Maybe that's why some have backed off from this site.

By the way, I am tolerant of my kids' behaviors..............in hindsight. It is hard, hard, hard at the time. You wonder what you should do, what will work, how can you be a better, more loving parent while being a disciplinarian at the same time. It's tough. I've raised 3 kids. Oldest served in military for several years, married, had child, divorced some time ago and has just purchased a new home,works steady job. Next has been with her husband almost 20 years, has child, owns a home, works steady. Youngest is married, has a baby, owns his own home, has been in military for 15 years. They're all reasonably happy and productive people who love their own kids and are raising them to the best of their ability, experiencing the same frustrations (one of my granddaughters is a graduated teen) that we felt raising ours.

I feel all my kids are successes in spite of and because mistakes I may have made as a parent. My daughter came right out and told me that she didn't want to raise her daughter how she had been raised. And she's not stern at all and that raises a whole new set of problems.

That is just how it is. From my own failures as a parent, I believe that it's not necessary to be so stern to children. From my own failures as a parent, I think if the room is dirty, close the door (as long as there are no critters) and worry about something that's worth the worry time. I caused myself so much stress when my kids were young by worrying about the small s*it that I didn't thoroughly enjoy their childhood as much as I could have....all in hindsight.

Understand, this is just my own opinion. I am not telling anyone else what to do.

Originally Posted by kidzpca

Boy. It must be official. I have been off this site for months and the moment I return you and your posse have to "HUNT" me down to cut me down to "size". Don't you have anything better to do?

Really the defiance of an 18 yo is normal but think it is her resposibility to be an adult like she states she is but she doesn't act like. Thus she is not ready for the "real" world. She knows my rules. But chose to blame MOTHER for her irresponsibility this morning. Thus, we searched her room since the brace was missing and she was being nasty to all around. She knows this is not tolerated and will not be allowed. She also knows I am thisclose to serving her eviction papers to make it official that she is out of here if her behavior doesn't improve. JUST LIKE in the "real" world. I will from now on act as if I am her landlord and if rules are broken...she is evicted. I did my job by raising her to 18 years old and graduated from high school.

Ha, ha, ha!! I do not have a posse and I have way more important things going on in my life than to hunt you down. I happen to log on bbs, saw a poll and responded. If you don't want opinions, don't post a poll on the internet.

IMO, you let your kids rule the roost, sorry if you don't like my opinion but we are all entitled to one.

Originally Posted by kidzpca

Boy. It must be official. I have been off this site for months and the moment I return you and your posse have to "HUNT" me down to cut me down to "size". Don't you have anything better to do?

Really the defiance of an 18 yo is normal but think it is her resposibility to be an adult like she states she is but she doesn't act like. Thus she is not ready for the "real" world. She knows my rules. But chose to blame MOTHER for her irresponsibility this morning. Thus, we searched her room since the brace was missing and she was being nasty to all around. She knows this is not tolerated and will not be allowed. She also knows I am thisclose to serving her eviction papers to make it official that she is out of here if her behavior doesn't improve. JUST LIKE in the "real" world. I will from now on act as if I am her landlord and if rules are broken...she is evicted. I did my job by raising her to 18 years old and graduated from high school.

Oh wow, I don't even have kids and kidzpca royally pissed me off. "I did my job by raising her to 18 years old and graduated from high school." REALLY? Your "JOB" is never done, as a parent. God do you realize how much of an ASS that makes you sound like? I almost feel SORRY for the other two? When they get stressed out, because now a days graduating H.S. and finding a job is a BIG ACCOMPLISHMENT, are you going to "evict" them too. Wow. Nice job, "Dad". Or should they being addressing you as "Mr. xyz" since clearly you're the landlord.
I only hope she has a good enough job where she can leave, rather than be "evicted" by her own father.
She's trying to make her way in the world, and yes, probably IS a bit snarky... but you... WOW.

I happen to agree with kidzpca. If it was my child living in my home....yep, my rules or bye bye. The kids weren't expected to pay rent until they graduated and turned 18. After that, if they wanted to stay at home then they had to contribute to the house. I also expected respect. To be honest, if one of mine had gone off on me...well, let us just say it wouldn't be pretty.

Originally Posted by gmyers

I don't care how stressed a kid is it doesn't give them free reign to be smart asses with their parents. I imagine the parents are stressed out worrying about paying for their college education among other things. I've seen on tv and in person the way kids talk to their parents today and theres no way I would put up with it. They'd have to find a job and an apartment and then they can act as snotty as they want to. Only not to me. Theres too much molly coddling kids and saying they're just being teens. No they're just being jerks and theres no call for it.

Originally Posted by tngirl

I happen to agree with kidzpca. If it was my child living in my home....yep, my rules or bye bye. The kids weren't expected to pay rent until they graduated and turned 18. After that, if they wanted to stay at home then they had to contribute to the house. I also expected respect. To be honest, if one of mine had gone off on me...well, let us just say it wouldn't be pretty.

I couldn't have said it better myself. Bottom line respect me or if you are going to act like a Jerry Springer/Maury Povich/Steve Wilkos "guest" go be one...But not in MY HOUSE.

BTW krisharry: You make it a point to cut people down to your level every chance you get. But then You do hide behind the computer screen. Don't you?

Originally Posted by kidzpca

I couldn't have said it better myself. Bottom line respect me or if you are going to act like a Jerry Springer/Maury Povich/Steve Wilkos "guest" go be one...But not in MY HOUSE.

BTW krisharry: You make it a point to cut people down to your level every chance you get. But then You do hide behind the computer screen. Don't you?

LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, Honestly, I do NOT cut people down. I give my honest thoughts and opinions on topics that people post. Sorry my posts are not all hugs and smooches like some others but I will always stand by what I say. For the record, I have also given my fair share of support, prayers, and good thoughts to many on this board including yourself when your dd was ill. BTW, I am happy for you and your family that she is well and graduating from hs.

As far as hiding behind a computer, I am NOT hiding. I def. tell it like I see it on the boards and in real life. What would you have me do? Call you out to your local Walmart parking lot for a showdown? LMAO

This will be my final post in this thread. I don't want the mods to have any extra work this w/end.

I think it is just as bad to be too clean as it is to be too messy. I didn't say filthy. That is different. My neighbor across the street locked her 3 boys out. She mopped her garage. When her parents were in their 60's they were at her house washing windows. Her boys would drink beer and wash their cars in the driveway but when mama got home you wouldn't know because everything would be cleaned up and put away.
Her boys are grown now. They never come home. She has to call a taxi to go get her hair done or buy groceries. My husband was locked out of his house growing up and wasn't allowed to play in the house. He made me promise before we married that I would never lock our kids out and that they could play in the house. Our house was where the kids gathered. It is hard to keep a straight house when the kids play in the house. My kids are home quite often. My other neighbor raised her kids like us and her kids are home all the time too. I think that says it all.