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  1. #23
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    Talking Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    12 Days of Christmas - A Cat's Rendition

    On the twelfth day of Christmas my human gave to me:
    Twelve bags of catnip!
    Eleven tarter Pounce treats,
    Ten ornaments hanging,
    Nine wads of Kleenex,
    Eight peacock feathers,
    Seven stolen Q-tips,
    Six feathered balls,
    Five MILK JUG RINGS!
    Four munchy house plants,
    Three running faucets,
    Two fuzzy mousies,
    And a hamste-e-er in a plastic ball!!
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

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  3. #24
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    12 Days of Christmas - AOL Style

    ========

    On the twelfth day of AOL those wieners gave to me,

    12 reasons to cancel,

    11 channels not working,

    10 hours without mail,

    9 frozen chat rooms,

    8 hours of busy signals,

    7 frozen IMs,

    6 disconnections,

    5 web crashes,

    4 idiots at tech help,

    3 error messages,

    2 pieces of junk mail,

    and a jerk cursing in a chat room.
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  4. #25
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    'Twas The Night Before Christmas In Palm Beach


    'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the town,
    No noses were frozen, no snow fluttered down.
    No children in flannels were tucked into bed,
    They all wore shorty pajamas instead.

    To find wreaths of holly, was not very hard,
    For holly trees grew in every back yard.
    In front of the houses, Dads and Moms were
    Adorning the bushes and coconut palms.

    The sleeping kiddies were dreaming in glee,
    Hoping to find water skis under the tree.
    They all knew that Santa was well on his way,
    In a Mercedes-Benz, instead of a sleigh.

    And soon he arrived and started to work,
    He hadn't a second to linger or shirk.
    He whizzed up the highways and zoomed up the road,
    In an S-L 300, delivering his loads.

    The tropical moon gave the city a glow,
    And lighted the way for old Santa below.
    As he jumped from the auto he gave a wee chuckle,
    He was dressed in Bermudas with an Ivy league buckle,

    There weren't any chimneys, but that caused him no gloom,
    For Santa came in through the Florida room.
    He stopped at each house....stayed only a minute,
    Emptying his sack of stuff that was in it.

    Before he departed, he treated himself
    To a glass of papaya juice upon the shelf.
    He turned with a jerk and bounced to the car,
    Remembering he still had to go very far.

    He shifted the gears and stepped on the gas
    And up the main highway he went like a flash.

    And I heard him exclaim as he went on his way,

    "MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL, I WISH I COULD STAY!"

    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  5. #26
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    12 Days Of Microsoft Christmas
    by Gil Glass



    On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    8 Megs overflowin'
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    9 apps a crashin'
    8 Megs overflowin'
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    10 modes not supported
    9 apps a crashin'
    8 Megs overflowin'
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    11 instructions faulty
    10 modes not supported
    9 apps a crashin'
    8 Megs overflowin'
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six 4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    and Windows 98 for my PC


    On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    12 sound cards silent
    11 instructions faulty
    10 modes not supported
    9 apps a crashin'
    8 Megs overflowin'
    7 files missin'
    6 ints conflictin'
    5 eighty six
    4 sectors bad
    3 ports not responding
    2 GPFs
    ... and Windows 98 for my PC

    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  6. #27
    Jolie Rouge's Avatar
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
    (Feline style)



    On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me...
    A batch of my special hand-print cookies.
    I had turned my back to grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove. In that micro-second, Sara climbed onto the table, poked her paw into the delightfully kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance, fell into the cookie dough.
    Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups of sugar, three sticks of butter.... Of course, it would have been cheaper to remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and just rename the recipe Paw Print Cookies.



    On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me....
    On a trip to the vet clinic.
    Who knew that skinny curling ribbon has feline taste appeal? I didn't.
    Damages: $28 for the office visit, $36 for anesthesia so the veterinarian could take $55 X-rays in case Sara had taste-tested any other Christmas decorations, and a heck of a lot of embarrassment when the vet removed the 3' curly tail in slightly less than two seconds by tugging at it with a pair of tweezers.



    On the third day of Christmas, my kitten wrecked for me...
    13 ornaments on my Christmas tree.
    My mistake was forgetting to chain the decorations to the branches. My other error was leaving the room to go to the bathroom while Sara feigned sleeping under the tree. How was I to know she was actually measuring its climbing potential?
    Value of broken bulbs? 7.50 plus tax.



    On the fourth day of Christmas, my kitten broke for me...
    A statue in my Lenox Nativity.
    Would you believe two Wise men plus a head?
    Lenox nativity figurines: $55.99



    On the fifth day of Christmas, my kitten scratched for me...
    The kid across the street who collects for charity.
    It was an accident. She merely wanted to reach out and touch someone. Unfortunately, she used a unsheathed claw to do so.
    I settled out-of-court for the cost of a jacket to replace the boy's blood stained one and a hefty donation to the charity of their choice. Although the amount must remain secret according to our settlement, let me put it this way. You haven't seen many soldiers for the Salvation Army this year, have you? Think: Major Windfall!



    On the sixth day of Christmas, my kitten opened for me...
    The presents beneath my Christmas tree.
    It was only two, really. While doing some early shopping at a discount store, I purchased a catnip mouse for Sara's stocking. Apparently, anything in the same bag as catnip takes on its potent aroma for a very long time.
    Replacement costs: $3.99 for another roll of Christmas wrapping paper, $4.50 for two empty boxes, $1 each for the kind of bows Sara can't unravel.


    On the seventh day of Christmas, my kitten lost for me...
    The earrings I bought for my sister Mary.
    Actually, it was one earring but since Mary doesn't have a hole in her nose or navel, a pair of matching earrings does make a more appealing gift.
    Sale price: $29.95 plus tax.



    On the eighth day of Christmas, my kitten helped me...
    Replace my E and G guitar strings.
    Would you believe a kitten could fit into the itty-bitty hole in the middle of my Yamaha guitar? Neither could I, but Sara thought so. And she succeeded once she got those rascally strings out of the way. Unfortunately, her little rear end couldn't get out the way it came in. After paying through the whiskers for her previous escapades, I would have been willing to leave her in the guitar for the duration of the holiday season, except that she chose to get stuck two hours before I was due at the nursing home for our annual Christmas carol sing-a-long.
    Set of steel guitar strings: $12.95; jar of petroleum jelly: 79 cents.



    On the ninth day of Christmas, my kitten destroyed for me...
    My Christmas card list when she walked across my computer's delete key.
    Cost for call to Computer Country's 900/help line: $17.50. And I still don't know what happened to the listings of B through H.


    On the tenth day of Christmas, my kitten hid from me.....
    The remote control from my 13-inch TV.
    This wouldn't be such a disaster if she hadn't previously stolen the power knob. I missed a week's worth of Christmas specials, including my all-time favorite, "It's a Wonderful Life."
    Rental of "It's a Wonderful Life": $2; purchase of book, "Good owners, great cats": $24.95. Unfortunately, it never mentions the psychological profile of kittens with kleptomania.



    On the eleventh day of Christmas, my kitten ate for me.....
    The drumsticks off my 19-pound turkey.
    OK,OK, So this one time it was my fault. I knew I never should have uttered those now infamous words: "Your first turkey, Sara. Want to try just a little piece?"
    Cost: Christmas Dinner.


    On the 12th day of Christmas........
    Sara rested.
    And so, thank goodness, did my VISA card.
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  7. #28
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    Signs You Bought A Bad Christmas Tree


    10. It's two feet tall, forty feet wide

    9. Salesman's opening line: "You're not a cop, are you?"

    8. It looks suspiciously like a broom handle with a lot of coat hangers stuck into it

    7. While you sleep, it gets liquored up and takes the family caravan for a joy ride

    6. Each branch has "Duraflame" printed on it

    5. It keeps heckling while you try to do a lame top ten list

    4. It's very small and says "Air Freshener" on it

    3. Rabbis have better Christmas trees than yours

    2. Some guy named Akbar puts a cheap Statue of Liberty on top of it

    and number one reason, you bought a bad christmas tree:

    1. It's constantly bragging about its "trunk size"
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  8. #29
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    The True Meaning of Christmas


    'Twas the night before Jesus came and all through the house
    Not a creature was praying, not one in the house.
    Their Bibles were lain on the shelf without care
    In hopes that Jesus would not come there.

    The children were dressing to crawl into bed,
    Not once ever kneeling or bowing a head.
    And Mom in her rocker with baby on her lap
    Was watching the Late Show while I took a nap.

    When out of the East there arose such a clatter,
    I sprang to my feet to see what was the matter.
    Away to the window I flew like a flash
    Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash!

    When what to my wondering eyes should appear
    But angels proclaiming that Jesus was here.
    With a light like the sun sending forth a bright ray
    I knew in a moment this must be The Day!

    The light of His face made me cover my head
    It was Jesus! returning just like He had said.
    And though I possessed worldly wisdom and wealth
    I cried when I saw Him in spite of myself.

    In the Book of Life which He held in His hand
    Was written the name of every saved man.
    He spoke not a word as He searched for my name;
    When He said "It's not here" my head hung in shame.

    The people whose names had been written with love
    He gathered to take to His Father above.
    With those who were ready He rose without a sound
    While all the rest were left standing around.

    I fell to my knees, but it was too late;
    I had waited too long and this sealed my fate.
    I stood and I cried as they rose out of sight;
    Oh, if only I had been ready tonight.

    In the words of this poem the meaning is clear;
    The coming of Jesus is drawing near.
    There's only one life and when comes the last call
    We'll find that the Bible was true after all!

    -- Author Unknown
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  9. #30
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    The Eight Days of Hanukkah



    On the first night of Hanukkah my true love gave to me
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the second night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the third night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the fourth night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    4 potato latkes
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the fifth night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    5 bowls of chicken soup
    4 potato latkes
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the sixth night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    6 pickled herrings
    5 bowls of chicken soup
    4 potato latkes
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the seventh night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    7 noodle kugels
    6 pickled herrings
    5 bowls of chicken soup
    4 potato latkes
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese

    On the eighth night of Hanukkah, my true love gave to me
    8 Alka- Seltzer
    7 noodle kugels
    6 pickled herrings
    5 bowls of chicken soup
    4 potato latkes
    3 pounds of corned beef
    2 Kosher pickles and
    Lox, bagels and some cream cheese


    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  10. #31
    Jolie Rouge's Avatar
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    CNN's Twelve Days of Christmas


    On the first day of Christmas my CNN Anchor showed to me

    A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 2nd day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 3rd day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 4th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 5th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 6th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 7th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 8th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    8 Cups of Coffee;
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 9th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    9 Floater Stories;
    8 Cups of Coffee;
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 10th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    10 Anchor Tosses;
    9 Floater Stories;
    8 Cups of Coffee;
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 11th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    11 Live Events;
    10 Anchor Tosses;
    9 Floater Stories;
    8 Cups of Coffee;
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.

    On the 12th day of Christmas, my CNN Anchor gave to me,
    12 Websites;
    11 Live Events;
    10 Anchor Tosses;
    9 Floater Stories;
    8 Cups of Coffee;
    7 Perky Reporters;
    6 Field Producers;
    5 Camera Men.....
    4 Teleprompters;
    3 Telephones;
    2 Microphones;
    and A Lap Top on the news desk.



    [Thanks to and by Joy L. Baker]
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  11. #32
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    Twelve Days Of Guamanian Christmas


    On the first day of Christmas,
    My good friend sent to me,
    A gecko in a flame tree.

    On the second day of Christmas,
    My true friend gave to me,
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the third day of Christmas,
    My true friend gave to me,
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the forth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me,
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the fifth day of Christmas.
    My true friend gave to me,
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the sixth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me,
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the seventh day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me,
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the eighth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me,
    Eight cans of Raid.
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the ninth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me,
    Nine real bananas.
    Eight cans of Raid.
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the tenth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me.
    Ten TDY dads.
    Nine real bananas.
    Eight cans of Raid.
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the eleventh day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me.
    Eleven mowers mowing.
    Ten TDY dads.
    Nine real bananas.
    Eight cans of Raid.
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.

    On the twelfth day of Christmas
    My true friend gave to me.
    Twelve fresh chicken eggs.
    Eleven mowers mowing.
    Ten TDY dads.
    Nine real bananas.
    Eight cans of Raid.
    Seven pairs of zories.
    Six days in Hong Kong.
    Five princess rings.
    Four rolls of plastic.
    Three air conditioners.
    Two tape recorders.
    And a gecko in a flame tree.
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

  12. #33
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    Re: The Twelve Days of Christmas : Revisited & Revised

    A Psycho's Twelve Days Of Christmas


    On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me
    a frontal lobotomy.


    On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.

    On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    eight cries of help,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    nine attempts to escape,
    eight cries of help,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    ten ripped off fingernails,
    nine attempts to escape,
    eight cries of help,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    eleven body pieces.ten ripped off fingernails,
    nine attempts to escape,
    eight cries of help,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.


    On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
    twelve life sentences,
    eleven body pieces,
    ten ripped off fingernails,
    nine attempts to escape,
    eight cries of help,
    seven counts of harrassment,
    six restraining orders,
    five self help books,
    four group sessions,
    three stays at the "hospital",
    two cases of Prozac,
    and a frontal lobotomy.

    Or, was that today? uh oh...
    Laissez les bon temps rouler! Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.** a 4 day work week & sex slaves ~ I say Tyt for PRESIDENT! Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously ....Suki ebaynni IS THAT BETTER ?

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