Thread: Please somebody tape my mouth shut for real

I'd love the laugh. I become a con-artist when on meds. I am hypersensitive to meds. When I was in the hospital after a miscarriage I guess I got the doctor and nurse to bring me, well this and that because I was not going to go get it. I guess I also made a nurse cry and had the docotr shaking his head at my "negotiating skills." I remember none of it. Also when I had my first daughter they gave me some demerol to stitch me back up and I talked the nurse into bringing me something to eat and drink even though they were not supposed to for a couple of hours. How did I repay the nurse? I promptly threw up about 5 minutes later.

Its a cold cold world, LOL you can all bring friends and watch if you like popcorn is 5 bucks per dixie cup(gotta make money somehow) hubby is going with me I'll be home by 2 pm gotta be at the hospital at 6 am its an hours drive and I can't sleep. As usual my Mom is not going, the last surgery I had I was telling men bashing jokes which was alright except the anesthesiologist was a man, when I past him in the hallway I was answering the nurses question and he said, "Has she not shut up yet?" Apparently he did not appreciate my jokes at all nor my wonderful sense of humor.LOL I can't remember the jokes now but a lot of the jokes I had read on here from you guys. I feel sorry for these poor trapped souls who will be doing the surgery can you imagine having to be trapped in a room with a bad comedianne, a very bad comedianne. Thanks for all the good wishes and will never understand why you all are being piggish with the duct tape, I must not be the only one into bondage.

I can't remember what else I said but when I had my c-section I was in & out of it after DD was born. I can remember waking up in the recovery room and seeing the 2 nurses standing near my feet. Both had blonde hair and similar glasses and I distinctly remember saying to them they looked like twins. LOL Same thing when I had knee surgery in '82, I came to in my room talking about all kinds of things but the one thing I wanted to know all the time was what time it was. Bugged everybody about it until someone finally told me and I went right back to sleep.

Don't feel alone... atleast you are only telling jokes... I cussed a nurse out cause I needed to ... well go ... and she kept telling me I didn't... Hubby tells me I finally had enough of her telling me I didn't understand how my own body functions and told her off good. And last month I told my Oral Surgeon he had 3 eyeballs and the one in the middle was a very pretty shade of purple. I have also told my hubby that my grandmother better not show up at the hospital to visit me dressed like a wh0re! We are talking about a strict southern baptist woman here... so the comment was so totally off the wall that he STILL laughs about it 4 years later. Rest assured, no matter what you say in a semi conscious state, they will giggle and ignore it... they have heard much worse than a slaughtered joke!!!

Thanks one and all I had the surgery yesterday and all went well I told my concerns to the anesthesiologist and when I woke up all was quiet. Thanks goodness if I did run my mouth while I was under I was so doped up at least I don't recall what I said this time.

Good to see you Mesue.....glad surgery went wel....and no dirty jokes were told.