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View Full Version : Tell Me I'm Not Being Paranoid


sunniekiss
10-25-2010, 09:11 AM
Real quick: my ds is living back home since he graduated this Spring from college & will be until he finds a job in his field. He does have a full time job but doesn't make enough to live anywhere else. He doesn't pay rent & I have never asked him to(I want him to save & move). I trust him 100%.

Back to my issue: have you ever gone into your home & just know something is just not right? Small things like knowing I took garbage out before I went to work only to come home to stuff being in the trash can or knowing you just put a full roll of toilet paper on the holder only to come home & it is half gone? I was really thinking I was half losing my brain.

On Friday my son mentioned that his g/f stopped off to see the kitten. Okay. I thought she stopped off AFTER my son came home from work. Then he mentioned that she had fallen asleep with the kitten for over 2 hours. Hmmmm but he only got off of work at 3 & it was now 3:30 so two hours????? I thought he took the kitten over to her house, which I don't want since she IS only 8 weeks old (hey his cat but I foot the vet bill if she gets sick). Nope...she was at my house ALONE all day & has been coming over without anyone being home for months. OK not thrilled with that but I do 99% trust the girl however I am not so sure about her sister & the sister's boyfriend. See the thing is, last month my son gave me his car insurance money which I KNOW I put in my dresser drawer which I can't find & have some jewerly missing. I took this as I must have forgotten spending the money & just lost the jewerly.

There are 5 keys to my house. I have 2, he has 2 & one was hidden very well which only he & I knew where. No one could see where anything is hidden in my backyard.

Is this considence or am I being paranoid?
pepperpot
10-25-2010, 09:22 AM
Not paranoid. His gf should not be there if he is not there. (How does she get in?) She does not live there...and that goes big time for her family. You are not being paranoid.

Not a good situation at all. :headshake:
freeplease
10-25-2010, 10:25 AM
Change those locks today. Explain to your son that his girlfriend is not to be over when the house is empty. He's living there for free. It's your house. Your rules. The alternative isn't one he'll like, I'm sure. It's also a liability thing. Explain it to him in adult terms. Don't blame the gf for missing money. Just general terms of safety, etc.
justme23
10-25-2010, 10:37 AM
Nope, not paranoid. I wouldn't want anyone not my blood (and really, not even some of them) in my home w/out me there. The thought skeeves me out. Yes, I agree... change the locks and if he doesn't like the new rules then he can figure out how to live on his own.
candygirl
10-25-2010, 10:50 AM
I agree ," Not Paranoid " , you need to talk to your son & change the locks ASP, also check around to see what else is missing.
sunniekiss
10-25-2010, 11:11 AM
THANK YOU!!!! No I never mentioned the missing money or jewerly. The locks are being changed tonight. My son thinks I am being paranoid so I am happy to see I'm not.
I've emptied out my dishwasher before I go to work only to find dirty dishes inside the dishwasher when I get home. I was beginning to think I have somebody living in my attic.
3lilpigs
10-25-2010, 11:18 AM
Sounds like the GF is making herself at home......when you're not.

I wouldn't allow it. I don't like anyone in my house when I'm not here.....not even my own family. lol

I don't think you're being paranoid. It's your house, and you should always go by your intuition. (Women's intuition is always right! :D )
Kelsey1224
10-25-2010, 01:42 PM
Absolutely not paranoid! She is definitely enjoying your home while you aren't there. That has got to stop!
BeanieLuvR
10-25-2010, 01:55 PM
Not paranoid at all. I'd make sure your DS knows after you change the locks no one else is to get a key. I would not like the thought of people being in my house going through things when I'm not home.
freeplease
10-25-2010, 03:37 PM
Also, if you have a landline, check your phone charges. And go through your cache file on your pc. Who knows what's been going on.

Your son will change his tune pretty quick when he's out in the real world. You tend to watch over your stuff better when you're paying for it.
JENNIFERCATLADY
10-25-2010, 03:39 PM
I totally agree with everyone. But then again I grew up with "You are living under our roof so you follow our rules"!
SLance68
10-26-2010, 02:38 PM
I would have had a hissy fit if I found out his GF was in my home when I wasn't there. Oh hell no. She needs to go. If he doesn't like it he can go with her, and YOUR car stays with you not him & the GF. I also would not leave a key in a hidden place, thieves are resourceful and will look in the craziest places for stuff.
sunniekiss
10-27-2010, 07:30 AM
I really thought I was losing my mind. Things like knowing I put a full roll of toilet paper on the holder but it being 1/2 gone when I get home or knowing I took the garbage out only to find trash in it when I got home were happening.
Locks have been changed, he paid for them. I do understand why she was coming over, her father is a bit bipolar at times & doesn't take meds, but I informed them BOTH that I need to be asked before otherwise he & his cat can pack-up & move.
MY HOME...MY RULES!
mosdata1
10-27-2010, 10:35 AM
I really thought I was losing my mind. Things like knowing I put a full roll of toilet paper on the holder but it being 1/2 gone when I get home or knowing I took the garbage out only to find trash in it when I got home were happening.
Locks have been changed, he paid for them. I do understand why she was coming over, her father is a bit bipolar at times & doesn't take meds, but I informed them BOTH that I need to be asked before otherwise he & his cat can pack-up & move.
MY HOME...MY RULES!


Good for you. Your son must realize that you are doing him a favor, and his GF is not included in the package. I can't believe that neither one of them would check with you to make sure that this would be okay.
Anyway, glad you got that settled.