friend of mine no more

[krisharry]

OK, long story short a friend has a 4 yr old son, works hard and just can't make ends meet, so occasionally I help her out when I can for eg. bought son backpack for school, some uniform pants and shirts no biggie

Now she is w/a new boyfriend who I don't like bec. I think he is just using her for $$ as he is always out of work. She calls up says she is almost out of food and could I spare $20 til her next check so she can get some things for her son(she gets paid every 2 weeks) So instead I go to store and stock up for him, milk, juice, bread, tuna, pb&j, bananas, oranges, chickentenders, little debbies, goldfish crackers, etc.

Now comes the good part-I got a call from her grandma and her son has been w/her for the last 2 weeks on vacation. So now I spent my and Dh $$ for her to undoubtedly feed her boyfriend. I am livid and po'd. How dare she play on my sympathies for the child? I am done with her.

[jasmine]

this new boyfriend must have some kind of control over her for her to do that to you. I hope she will be ok.

Also, I'm sorry you had to waste your money!!

[pepperpot]

She calls up says she is almost out of food and could I spare $20 til her next check so she can get some things for her son(she gets paid every 2 weeks)

Maybe she was trying to have food for him when he got home? :shrug

[BeanieLuvR]

I'm sorry she took advantage of you. That is pretty low lying about it being for her son when he isn't even there. I wonder if she was wanting the money for something else and just said it was for food.

[tsquared]

In my book the kiddos would come first and the new~~old boyfriend would be last on the totem pole......especially if there was a need for food!!!!!!!!!!!

[speedygirl]

You've got a really good heart to help her and her son. The best thing you can do is not give her money b/c she's taking advantage of your helpfulness. If you are sure she really needs food for her DS and you want to help, bring over a few things.

[iluvmybaby]

I think that you are a very good person with a good heart. Next time she calls with a sob story invite her kid to come over for dinner if you want to help him/her, that way you KNOW the child will have something to eat. To me it sounds like she wanted $20 to buy drugs, not food ...but accepted the food anyways because what could she say, no the money was for drugs

[krisharry]

Maybe she was trying to have food for him when he got home? :shrug

No, I confronted her on it and she admitted that she lied bec. she knew I wouldn't help her if it was for bf.

[krisharry]

I think that you are a very good person with a good heart. Next time she calls with a sob story invite her kid to come over for dinner if you want to help him/her, that way you KNOW the child will have something to eat. To me it sounds like she wanted $20 to buy drugs, not food ...but accepted the food anyways because what could she say, no the money was for drugs

That is a good idea about inviting him over to eat. I think I will go that route next time. She admitted that she lied bec. I wouldn't help the bf who is lazy and used the last of her paycheck for the 2 of them to go out and have a few drinks.

[pepperpot]

No, I confronted her on it and she admitted that she lied bec. she knew I wouldn't help her if it was for bf.

eek! :eek:

Yeah, I'd be looking for a new friend.....:headshake poor kid...:(

[Mini]

I dont understand how hes using her for her money when she doesnt have any(obviously if you are helping her out).

You are a good friend for wanting to help but Im guessing her money is going somewhere other then food and bills for her and her son, and im not talking about the new bf either. I know it sucks only getting a check every 2 weeks but even people that get paid once a month know how to scrimp and make it by without having to ask(not saying shes a bad person for asking but just saying the money is going somewhere) and the fact that she lied to you just proves shes taking advantage of you and its no telling when that started doesnt mean it was the new bf that it started with....

[Shann]

I agree w/ the others, you do have a big heart. :hug I would be peeved as well. I feel so bad for her son, sounds like she may end up putting deadbeat bf in front of her son's needs like many other women. :( I hope this isn't the case and her son doesn't end up going w/o food. :(

[dv8grl]

I'll glady give them some money for a vasectomy!
Sounds like scumbum BF & your EX BFF don't need to bring anymore mouths into this world for other people to take care of.

[tunisia]

I'd say that anyone who would spend their last dime to go out drinking without putting the needs of their child first...well I guess that speaks volumes.

I feel so badly for the little boy. BF sounds like one dirty louse and she isn't too far behind either. I bet from now on I'd buy things that would be 'kid appealing' that adults wouldn't want: luncheables, ...well that is all I can think of because I don't shop for kids.

[krisharry]

I dont understand how hes using her for her money when she doesnt have any(obviously if you are helping her out).

You are a good friend for wanting to help but Im guessing her money is going somewhere other then food and bills for her and her son, and im not talking about the new bf either. I know it sucks only getting a check every 2 weeks but even people that get paid once a month know how to scrimp and make it by without having to ask(not saying shes a bad person for asking but just saying the money is going somewhere) and the fact that she lied to you just proves shes taking advantage of you and its no telling when that started doesnt mean it was the new bf that it started with....

Yeah, It isn't all the new bf, she does this every time she hooks up with a new guy. she blows all her money on the new guy-who usually doesn't have a job-and then gets herself into a jam. I should have know better. Lesson learned.

[fleabones3]

Sounds like the poor kid has a poor excuse of a mother and the mother will hook up with anything with a penis and the kid has to suffer for it.

[WendyLou75]

Yeah, It isn't all the new bf, she does this every time she hooks up with a new guy. she blows all her money on the new guy-who usually doesn't have a job-and then gets herself into a jam. I should have know better. Lesson learned.

Why does she feel the need in my opinion to buy a new boyfriend?

[Freebeemom]

Wow, Sounds like my Sister! I am sorry this happened to you. I just don't understand people.....