Grudges! Do you hold them?

[Njean31]

i was wondering how many people how grudges. i am of the mindset that life is too short and if someone has hurt me that i really love and they are truly sorry for whatever it was then i will forgive them.

heck, i really don't have to truly love the person if they are just truly sorry, i will forgive them people as well like coworkers, acquaintances, etc.

Now, this does not include anyone physically assaulting me or most anything involving my children. if you mess with my children, in almost any form or fashion, i'm done with you.

[ahippiechic]

Yeah, I'm pretty bad to hold a grudge.

[freeby4me]

I hold grudges.

[vicky122]

I try not to But I will just stay away from the person because they are really not worth being upset about.

[PrincessArky]

I would but my memory is shot so usually I forget to hold the grudge lol

I do have to say some of the really hurtful cutting things one person in my life has said to me will never leave but I learned to let go of the bad feelings I have for her.........she is just hateful to everyone

[ahippiechic]

I don't get upset either, but I do hold grudges. I'm not as bad for it now that I'm older and mellowed out a little more, but I sometimes still do it.

[Njean31]

well, i see some of you do hold them and i know a lot of people IRL that do. sometimes i feel like i want to start because i do have and have had in the past a lot of people who hurt my feelings and i'm getting tired of it. maybe i'm just a weak person.

[THEpouty1]

It depends on what's been said/done, but yeah, I hold grudges.

[magenta]

Typically no I will not hold a grudge.

But I am the kind of person if you break my trust I will NEVER trust you again. No matter what. I do not care how sorry they are.

[Njean31]

Typically no I will not hold a grudge.

But I am the kind of person if you break my trust I will NEVER trust you again. No matter what. I do not care how sorry they are.

so say if your child stole money from you, then you would never be able to trust them alone in your house?

[April78945]

Yes I hold grudges. I learned it from my mom. We call it deleting.

[magenta]

It would depend on the age of my child. If he was a small child there would be nothing to forgive. If he was a teenage child, probably not for a very long time. If it was an adult child absolutly not.

[Njean31]

It would depend on the age of my child. If he was a small child there would be nothing to forgive. If he was a teenage child, probably not for a very long time. If it was an adult child absolutly not.

well, that makes sense.

[dispatcher]

>Grudges! Do you hold them? <

i can and i will lol.

[lassss]

yesss lol I hold grudges but I am also very patient in doling out revenge. I am a firm believer in karma, and my siggy: given enough rope and one will eventually hang themself

[Njean31]

yesss lol I hold grudges but I am also very patient in doling out revenge. I am a firm believer in karma, and my siggy: given enough rope and one will eventually hang themself

it's funny you mentioned revenge because i was thinking about that too! what people thought about it. should a person seek revenge against another person who has hurt them? i mean REALLY hurt them, not just by some words.

[gmyers]

I do sometimes. It depends on whats said or done. But if we try to work it out then I try to let it go. I'm not always good at it though but I try.

[PrincessArky]

it's funny you mentioned revenge because i was thinking about that too! what people thought about it. should a person seek revenge against another person who has hurt them? i mean REALLY hurt them, not just by some words.

you mean someone that physically hurts someone? or by actions.......I mean like they have done something that has cut you deeply?

[magenta]

it's funny you mentioned revenge because i was thinking about that too! what people thought about it. should a person seek revenge against another person who has hurt them? i mean REALLY hurt them, not just by some words.

I don't seek revenge. I know what comes around goes around. lol


I can get mad at people and let it go. I think when you hold a grudge or seek revenge it only hurts you.

[Njean31]

you mean someone that physically hurts someone? or by actions.......I mean like they have done something that has cut you deeply?

well, no not physically because i think that would call for some revenge in the first place. somehow. but, even actions...where one intentionally sets out to hurt you. is revenge called for then you think?

[lassss]

I think it all depends on the person and situation at hand and how far you are willing to go to seek revenge. For instance there was a guy I was dating..MANY years ago and he turned out to be a real piece of work, liar cheat etc. By the time I got done with him, no woman would touch him. I won't disclose specifics but he got his day.



it's funny you mentioned revenge because i was thinking about that too! what people thought about it. should a person seek revenge against another person who has hurt them? i mean REALLY hurt them, not just by some words.

[Njean31]

I don't seek revenge. I know what comes around goes around. lol


I can get mad at people and let it go. I think when you hold a grudge or seek revenge it only hurts you.

this is how i've BEEN in the past but as i get older.....i'm getting tired of people hurting me/my feelings and getting away with it. i do know though holding grudges and seeking revenge does really hurt the person doing it but sometimes, it may just be worth really socking it to someone finally!

[PrincessArky]

well, no not physically because i think that would call for some revenge in the first place. somehow. but, even actions...where one intentionally sets out to hurt you. is revenge called for then you think?

well honestly I have had ppl in my life before that hurt me with the sole intention of hurting me.........I had to cut them out of my life simple as that. I have had some hurt me w/out intentionally meaning to hurt me and painfully I removed them from my life as well. I guess I am just not designed for revenge though lol I figure eventually everyone gets what is coming to them

[Njean31]

I think it all depends on the person and situation at hand and how far you are willing to go to seek revenge. For instance there was a guy I was dating..MANY years ago and he turned out to be a real piece of work, liar cheat etc. By the time I got done with him, no woman would touch him. I won't disclose specifics but he got his day.

see, i'll bet if felt good too! sometimes, i think a person needs some action instead of waiting around for karma to get them.

[MistyWolf]

It depends. Depends on my mood, how much I like you to begin with, what the issue is. But, I do agree that life is too short .. so I just won't talk to you anymore .. lol .. and go about my merry ole' life ;) .. lol.

[ahippiechic]

I do believe in Karma....what goes around comes around. BUT sometimes Karma is a little too slow for what little patience I have so I have to help it along a little. :D

[sheila_361]

I try not to hold grudges, life is just way to short, so as I see it, just suck it up and move on, such is life, we can't always please people all of the time...

[xtrememom]

Yep I hold grudges been holding one for 25 yrs now and another going on 8 yrs now. One w/my oldest son is about a month old now.

I do believe life is short and I do forgive but certain things like best friend trying to sleep with your spouse, child/so beating up a family member, lying about certain situations or telling people your parents are dead those are grudge holders IMO

xtrememom (who is dead according to my 22 yr old which really surprised me ! I missed my own funeral !!)

[xtrememom]

I do believe in Karma....what goes around comes around. BUT sometimes Karma is a little too slow for what little patience I have so I have to help it along a little. :D

ROFLMFAO you know I believe in Karma too and I have been sitting back and watching it slowly take the life out of someone who did someone we love wrong and this time I didn't have to help it along.

xtrememom

[Lild]

Yes in some cases I hold grudges.... Yes in some cases I believe in revenge, and No I do not believe in physically hurting someone for revenge...

If the person handles the situation with me, I usually forgive...though do not forget, ya know

[buglebe]

Nope I don't.

[vicky122]

Sometimes I have paid back the person. I do think what goes around comes around and hope that it comes back a lot harder then what it went. Is what I don't understand when someone holds a grudge other people hold it for no reason just because the person does.

[ElleGee]

I do... I hold them for a very loooong time.. It may not look like I am still po'ed at whatever but I am.

[Njean31]

Yes in some cases I hold grudges.... Yes in some cases I believe in revenge, and No I do not believe in physically hurting someone for revenge...

If the person handles the situation with me, I usually forgive...though do not forget, ya know

i don't believe in physically hurting someone for revenge either......unless they physically hurt me first. of course, i haven't been in a fight in over 20 years and hope to keep it that way.

[PrincessArky]

i don't believe in physically hurting someone for revenge either......unless they physically hurt me first. of course, i haven't been in a fight in over 20 years and hope to keep it that way.

heck at this pt in life I think I would hurt myself more than the other person would lol

[Lild]

i don't believe in physically hurting someone for revenge either......unless they physically hurt me first. of course, i haven't been in a fight in over 20 years and hope to keep it that way.

I could see myself wanting to seek revenge by physically hurting someone if they hurt my children (like physically hurt them)
Not like if another child hit them or anything like that, just if an adult hurt them

[tsquared]

dONT HOLD GRUDGES but will distance myself from people that want help and then once you help them they think you continually need to help them without helping themselves.

[tngirl]

I don't hold a grudge, but if you know I do NOT like you and I know you do NOT like me, stay away from me. I am not going to pretend to be your friend and find it hard to be friendly with someone that I have no respect for. Most things I can let slide, but there are some things that I don't forget and don't care to be around that person.

And just because someone apologizes, does not mean that I have to accept the apology. There are some things that an apology just doesn't work for. And I hate an empty apology. Someone made a post about empty or "qualified" apologies recently and I totally agreed with what they had to say. If you do not feel you have done anything wrong, why are you apologizing? And if you have to qualify an apology with "if" then why bother? You obviously have no idea what you did wrong.

There are really very few people in the world that I have a strong dislike for and those are the ones that have actually done a "personal" attack against me. I figure if someone feels that strongly "against" me then it shouldn't be a problem for them to avoid me.

[Jean_17764]

it depends on what happened,but mostly yes

[lucimPI]

Typically no I will not hold a grudge.

But I am the kind of person if you break my trust I will NEVER trust you again. No matter what. I do not care how sorry they are.

My feelings exactly. Someone just did this to me and I do not think that I could ever go back to being close friends again, in fact I know I could not go back. I feel, if I run into her in a public place, a quick hello and I am gone. When someone does this to you, there is never ever any going back to how things used to be.

[DAVESBABYDOLL]

I hold grudges, once I don't like you, it's not gonna change.lol

[Anig2u]

I don't hold grudges..I can't stay mad at anyone for very long. That being said, if I don't care for someone that is a different story..I am a pretty good judge of character so if I find that there is something I just don't like about someone, I don't want to be around them and I don't want to hear anything they have to say, because more than likely I will not like anything they stand for..and I will disagree with them . That excludes family....my Mom always taught us not to hold a grudge against family....especially our brother's & sister's. We are a very close family.

[littlered1]

I am real bad at this, I have people that I refuse to speak to over something they did 25 years ago.

[Sweetberries]

No I don't hold grudges :) I tend to forgive very easily ^__^ I have learned in life that holding grudges only hurts you in the end and I refuse to live my life as a angry person
besides I look at it this way if I had said or done something to someone and asked for forgiveness I would want them to forgive me right so it's only right that I forgive them now that's only if it's done against me :) now bring my family into it and you're looking for a fight
hope what I said makes sense

[BigLyd1]

I try to be forgiving but I never forget. I had a co-worker who used to be one my favorite people. He became my boss and became a jerk, bad-mouthed me, and tried to get the other co-workers against me. Somebody took over above him and denied him an extension when his time was up in our department. Now I have the best boss in the world. When things work out like this, I'm glad I didn't "do" anything because it all worked out in the end.