this is stupid but.....

[tljohn123]

I am very hurt today. Sweetie had a job at the mall and I usually go with him and putz around in another area while he's working. Today I wanted a pretzel in the worst way so I asked to go with him. This place is pretty close to home. Today he says, no you can't, I'm not supposed to take anyone with me. He's never had any problems before. Ok, so I wind up going with him anyway. He takes me around the back part of the mall and drops me off. Said he'd call me when he's done.

Well, I putzed around and got my pretzel and was walking out to the parking lot when I remembered something.......the place he was working, well, the manager (who is as old as his daughter btw, 24) had a 'thing' for him and wanted to go out with him in the worst way. The daughter put the kibosh on that because this girl was too young. This was before I met him.

So I put two and two together. Came up with four! So I asked him about it. He said he was afraid that I would make a scene! I wouldn't do that! That would compromise his job and he knows it. I'm hurt that he doesn't have any more faith in me than that. It's almost like he was trying to hide me......

[gmyers]

It sounds more like he's trying to keep you from finding out or seeing something. To change all of a sudden like that would make me suspicious. And why drop you off at the back of the mall unless he doesn't want someone to see you with him. I'd find a way there one day when he's not expecting you and not let him know and see whats going on.

[dangerousfem]

sorry.. hate to be the voice of doubt.. but I have to agree with gmyers.. seems funny to me.

[April78945]

I guess I am the only one who thinks it's wierd that you go to work with him when you don't work there also? I don't get the situation I guess. Maybe he dropped you off because people think it's wierd or odd that he brings you to work with him, I know I would.

[MsLynn]

i'm sorry but i also agree with gmyers and dangerousfem

[earnhardt1]

i have to also agree......

[ilikefree]

I agree...go there sometime unexpectedly.

[BlueBerriTerri]

I really hate to agree, but I do also. Your own intuition is nagging you, so it might be wise to not ignore it. He might not be doing anything wrong, but he is human, and we are fallible. A man's ego gets a big boost from a young girl's adoration and there are few that can resist indulging in it. In any case, he is thinking about it enough to change his normal behavior.

[tljohn123]

that little voice has been yelling at me all the time since this happened.
And I go to the mall, but I do NOT go to the store he has to work at. Today just happened to be my day off, and I wanted to spend time with him.
The girl wasn't there, she had apparently switched with another girl. So I know for a fact she wasn't there.

I did talk to him and I let him know it bothered me...a LOT. I asked him how he would feel if I pulled that same stunt...he told me that he'd feel the same way.

I am fairly sure he's not messing around on me. Either I am with him or the kids are with him. And he always always always answers the phone when I call him. He doesn't go to the mall unless it's for a job and I know no one comes over here. So....what the heck??

[ElleGee]

mid life crisis?

[tljohn123]

I wish I knew.......his ex treated him horribly and yet he still stayed with her even after everything that she pulled (pretty disgusting stuff too).
I told him the other day that maybe I needed to treat him like crap and go sleeping with anyone who would give me the time of day too. He said that wasn't a good idea. I'm not that kind of person anyway.

*sigh*

[BlueBerriTerri]

He sounds like a good guy, so I'm sure you guys will work it out. I've got one of those good guys too, and my view has been distorted by a lifetime of jerks so I have to work overtime to keep my distrust under control, lol.

[tljohn123]

he's a good guy....great dad, fun to be around. And yep I also have to keep myself under control. Today didn't help though!

[vicky122]

Well if he is a good guy always home or with you or the kids why are you trying to make something out of something that is not there? Don't bring on problems if you have a great husband.

[LorLee14]

I would just try and keep an eye on him. Him dropping you off at the back would seem odd and rude. Hopefully nothing is going on but I would do some unannounced checking up maybe say on a day he THINKS you have to work. It all just seems a little odd to shrug your shoulders and ignore everything.

[Debbie]

call cheaters,then you'll know,hopefully nothing is going on,I've been with my
husband 22 longggggggg years,it's been great,we all have our ups and downs,
nobody's relationship is perfect,just trust them and give each other space,
and if there's no trust,it's not worth the effort.

Good Luck

[BlueBerriTerri]

Well if he is a good guy always home or with you or the kids why are you trying to make something out of something that is not there? Don't bring on problems if you have a great husband.

I think there are times that we all feel a little insecure, and this is one of the places where we can seek a little reassurance, comfort, and advice even if it turns out that there was nothing to worry about. Women aren't the only ones who can be a little *****y and callous sometimes. Even the most caring husband can have an off day. There IS some gray area on the spectrum between LOVE and LORENA BOBBITT.

[PrincessArky]

I guess I am the only one who thinks it's wierd that you go to work with him when you don't work there also? I don't get the situation I guess. Maybe he dropped you off because people think it's wierd or odd that he brings you to work with him, I know I would.

I am with you

[LorLee14]

I think there are times that we all feel a little insecure, and this is one of the places where we can seek a little reassurance, comfort, and advice even if it turns out that there was nothing to worry about. Women aren't the only ones who can be a little *****y and callous sometimes. Even the most caring husband can have an off day. There IS some gray area on the spectrum between LOVE and LORENA BOBBITT.

Very well said!!!

[tljohn123]

Let me clarify something......I only went with him for the ride. I do not go into the job site with him. He is an independant contractor btw. This is not the first time that we've done this. Hell, he even takes the kids with him sometimes, espicially if i'm not at home to watch them. So, taking me along FOR THE RIDE isn't unusual.

I'm pretty insecure sometimes anyway. My ex didn't want me after 14 years and then lied to everyone about the split up. I have invested a lot of time and caring into this relationship and knowing that there is a girl who is a lot younger than me wanting the man I am with doesn't do the ole ego any good.

I don't cheat on him. Believe me, I have had many an opportunity, but I have never taken any of the offers up. I wouldn't hurt him like that. I sure as hell hope he wouldn't do that to me either.

And I am pretty sure this is nothing....but it was just so wierd the way he was acting.

[Freebeemom]

I would be upset too...I would definately ask him about it.