in-laws (update & new whine) lol

[myashley89]

Ok...this is sort of an ad-on whine to a previous post I made here :

http://www.bigbigforums.com/vent-whine/553504-all-i-gotta-say.html

anyway....its been 6 months & they are still here....still without jobs....well wednesday bil started in on hubby and a fight broke out...me & kids were hiding locked in our room...we had to call the cops to have them removed...knowing how my bil is...apparently they couldn't find anyone else to take them in, so thursday my mil says he contacted a lawyer & said that since they have established residency here...gets mail here etc...not that the pay us anything mind u....but legally we cannot kick them out without 30 days notice...so guess who came back? I told my hubby that there is NO WAY in hell that I am staying in this house by myself all day with them for the next 30 days...with him at work & my kids at school....so my mil moved in so I wouldn't have to be alone...bil has a major temper and he scares me...no foolin...hubby's gonna move the puter in my room so that I can stay in there all day til he gets home...seriously I feel like a prisoner here. Besides, bil blames this whole thing on me...calling me names & screamin....ugh...

Does anyone know if what he says is true? About the residency thing? Because I cannot imagine living the next 30 days of my life hiding in my room...

sorry so long and ty for listening...and if anyone does know anything or have any advice on the matter I would so greatly appreciate your input!!! TY

[wobblypops]

I don't think that is true. I would go get a PFA on him & they would remove his butt for you. It happens everday when a couple is splitting up, someone always has to leave.

[JKATHERINE]

I do think that's true. I have actually seen this on COPS, believe it or noot. Laws may vary by state, though.

I would serve them with an eviction ntice TODAY and have a police officer witness it if you can.

[ssgjeg]

Actually, I think Jkat is right. But maybe you could get an order of protection against your bil? You know, you're afraid of him and he has to stay so many feet away from you. Don't think he'd be able to live in the same house then. Get the eviction notice today then consult with a lawyer on the best way to handle this.

[dv8grl]

WOW! I'm so sorry you are trapped by this SOB. Hope the 30 days FLIES by!!! Good Luck!

[gmyers]

I think I would call the cops and ask them if what he says is true. Maybe they can tell you what to do if it is true. Now thats low class to move in with someone and then do them like that. I guarantee when I got him out he'd never come back again. I'm sorry for what he's putting you through.

[Memedav]

Bless your heart! What a mess that sounds like. I would go to the local police department and ask them that same question. If they do say that is the case, then I would go to the local magistrates office and file an eviction notice and have it served on his behind. It may cost $50 to have it filed/served, i'm really not sure. I would guess it would be well worth that though. If your lucky he will take great offense to that, get ticked off and never bother you again. Good luck to you and please let us know how it goes.

[nightrider127]

I live in Ohio and I have always heard that that is true. I would consult a lawyer though if I was you. We had a good friend who was a cop (miss you Greg) and he always said that he would not give out advice on civil law, which I think that would be.

Edited to add that I would think you could get a restraining order on your BIL and he would have to leave the house. Maybe if he has to go, the rest of them will go too.

[earnhardt1]

wow that sucks i wish you luck sounds like a great time for a vacation

[G'maDebbie]

I am not familiar with Ohio laws, but I do know in the state of Michigan, they have to be served with a 30 day notice, then if they don't move on the 30th day, you have to take them to court, then the court allows them 10 days to move, if they don't move, the sheriff can remove them on the 11th day, but this is not a speedy process at all.
I would definately suggest getting a personal protection order against him, that way you don't have to mess with the whole court process.

[magenta]

Did the "lawyer" serve you with papers to let him back in? Or did MIL just say this?

I would have told his ass to serve you to be let back in, then in the mean time filed for eviction. There is no way I would stay there, whether MIL was there or not.

You have been putting up with this crap for way too long.
Good luck, hope you can get the a-hole out.

[ma4angels]

I wouldn't think that would be the case here because he isn't paying you rent. You let him stay because of hard times. Go to the police department explain it to them they probably could help. Make sure you tell them about what he is saying to you and about the fight in front of your children. I wouldn't have let them come back, I would told them that doesn't hold true in this case only if you are their landlords and they are renting the house from you. They are really just house guest on a long visit.

[myspirit]

If it is your house, why can't you just kick them out and lock the door? Am I missing something?

[magenta]

myashley, go here and post what is going on, I bet someone can help. It is a legal board.


http://forum.freeadvice.com/

[PrincessArky]

OMG that is just scary I hope you are able to get them out ASPA

[JKATHERINE]

I wouldn't think that would be the case here because he isn't paying you rent. You let him stay because of hard times. Go to the police department explain it to them they probably could help. Make sure you tell them about what he is saying to you and about the fight in front of your children. I wouldn't have let them come back, I would told them that doesn't hold true in this case only if you are their landlords and they are renting the house from you. They are really just house guest on a long visit.

No. A lot of states require you to formally evict people (even houseguests) who have set up residency in your home. This means they've been there for an extended amount of time and (in this case, at least) are receiving mail there.

I have heard of cases before where a bum has moved into an empty house and the owners had to formally evict them even though they broke and entered into the house... :(

[nightrider127]

Now there's talk of my m-i-l moving in to drive him to work!!! If he gets a job that is...

I just read this in the original post. Could the lawyer story just be a front for what they really want to do, as in letting your MIL move in with you? I would definately check this out. You already have enough problems with family living with you. Having your MIL move in with you would just make the problem worse.

This is the very reason I would not allow certain family members to move in with us. And believe me, some have tried.

I truly hope that things work out for you.

[hunny]

I would file a restraining order, that way hes not allowed within a certain number of feet from you, then i think he would have to leave the house and if he didnt you could call the cops and have him arrested.
Hope it all works out.

[mosdata1]

I would go to court, armed with the orig police report & request an immediate restraining order. Once granted, I would go home, call the police & have him removed. While it is true that even for squatters you need to give an eviction notice, once a crime has been committed, or you fear for your safety, those are considered mitigating circumstances, so you might be albe to get them ALL out of your house.
The only other thing I would suggest is that as soon as you get them out, call a locksmith & get the best deadbolts you can afford placed on all your doors! Also change the locks that remain.
Good luck.

[lassss]

I would call the police and ask them. If you do need to serve them...it is called a Notice To Quit. I had to give one to ex's ex gf because she was living in My house after I moved out. I gave her 30 days to get out. Just to cover your butt if the cops can't throw him out immediately, call an officer over and let him know what's going on (and you have a record of it also) and give it to BIL in front of the cop.

Good advice on the restraining order, since the cops already been called in to break it up. I would go for the restraining order and get him outta there

[myashley89]

TY all for your responses & concerns....this thing about we have to evict him and he gets to come back and all that....in a way he is showing that he is controlling the situation...and I don't like that...it scares me...I don't want to make things worse...but I just want my house back & to feel safe in my own home...is that so much to ask?

TY all again & ty magenta for the legal advice forum link....I will post there & hopefully someone can help.

[ma4angels]

No. A lot of states require you to formally evict people (even houseguests) who have set up residency in your home. This means they've been there for an extended amount of time and (in this case, at least) are receiving mail there.

I have heard of cases before where a bum has moved into an empty house and the owners had to formally evict them even though they broke and entered into the house... :(

I know that my father always has to go to get formal papers on renters and they have thirty days. But being he is a guest in the home I would think there has to be some kind of loophole that could get these bums out of her house. I never heard about someone having to evict a thief out of house that he stole to begin with. That pretty much sucks for the people who owned the house. I think I would have had to just kick that persons a-- for that.:getyou

[myashley89]

ok...from what I have been told & found out from doing days of research online, the loser is right...we have to formally evict him. I guess I just don't understand how he can be considered a tenant & have tenant's rights....a TENANT PAYS RENT!! Therefore should have rights....he does not and never has paid rent. This totally sucks....none of us has even said a word to each other since wed when this all happened....this is gonna end soooo badly, I just know it.....not even so much as an apology from either one of them when they came back the next day. We just were trying to help someone we cared about in a time of need and they do us like this....unfortunately hubby says it will be the last time we ever try to help someone again....family or not...that's just sad...but I don't blame him at all....

TY again for all the responses & help...will update if anything major happens lol

[wobblypops]

I'm sorry to hear that but I have also been burned royally also not only once but twice within a few months of each case. I will never help anyone out ever again because of this.

I became bitter because of the one situation & now I am even to the point where I cut back on the volunteer work I do. The only places I do help out anymore is when it comes to senior citizens.

[LitWtch]

It is NOT true - whoevers name is on the lease or the mortage are the legal occupants. Kick his ass out. You should not be held prisoner in your home.

[nightrider127]

ok...from what I have been told & found out from doing days of research online, the loser is right...we have to formally evict him. I guess I just don't understand how he can be considered a tenant & have tenant's rights....a TENANT PAYS RENT!! Therefore should have rights....he does not and never has paid rent. This totally sucks....none of us has even said a word to each other since wed when this all happened....this is gonna end soooo badly, I just know it.....not even so much as an apology from either one of them when they came back the next day. We just were trying to help someone we cared about in a time of need and they do us like this....unfortunately hubby says it will be the last time we ever try to help someone again....family or not...that's just sad...but I don't blame him at all....

TY again for all the responses & help...will update if anything major happens lol

I can't tell you how sorry I am that this is happening to you. This is the very reason I wouldn't let some of my husbands family move in with us. I knew they would never leave on their own and I would have had to take the whole thing to court.

I would still try for a restraining order on him since he is scaring you and actually being verbally abusive to you. Maybe if you could get a restraining order on him to where he had to leave, the rest of them would leave too

[PrincessArky]

ok...from what I have been told & found out from doing days of research online, the loser is right...we have to formally evict him. I guess I just don't understand how he can be considered a tenant & have tenant's rights....a TENANT PAYS RENT!! Therefore should have rights....he does not and never has paid rent. This totally sucks....none of us has even said a word to each other since wed when this all happened....this is gonna end soooo badly, I just know it.....not even so much as an apology from either one of them when they came back the next day. We just were trying to help someone we cared about in a time of need and they do us like this....unfortunately hubby says it will be the last time we ever try to help someone again....family or not...that's just sad...but I don't blame him at all....

TY again for all the responses & help...will update if anything major happens lol

I am so sorry to hear this.

[myashley89]

Just an update....its been nearly a month and none of us have so much as said a word to each other....very stressfull indeed...but good news....they are moving out on Saturday!!! I finally get my house back. Hubby says as soon as they are out, we are changing the locks and our phone number...sad that we were just trying to help & it had to end this way....but at least its gonna be peaceful again...:)

[PrincessArky]

good news....they are moving out on Saturday!!!

woohoo thats great news

[galeane29]

Congradulations!!!! You should throw a party....lol

[tigger4]

Sorry you are going through all of this.

My DH told my Godson's mom they could stay with us. My Godson (who is 4) stayed with us for over 2 months. His mom stayed for less than 9 days.

We told her after the 5th day here that she had one month to move. By the 9th day she was here CPS had taken her son away from her because she was abusing him and she was supposed to be arrested but of course wasn't.

She left our house the day they took her son stating to the police officer that was here that she would be back in 4 days to get her belongings.

She showed up the next day to get her stuff. I refused to let her into my home since she had made arrangements to get her stuff at a later date. I called the police since she wouldn't leave. I was told by the police that since she lived here (even for 9 days) that she could come into my home anytime she wanted to. She could even legally break in the door to get in if she needed to.

Word of warning do not let anyone ever stay in your home. They can be there for one day or 5 years it doesn't matter. As soon as they move in they become a tenant and you have to legally evict them.

[myashley89]

Trust me...we will not be doing this again!!!!

[tigger4]

Hopefully they will move out on Saturday and not hassle you.

[myspirit]

Get a Big, Big, mean dog!

[ang in NC]

bring some boxes into the house, play loud music in the middle of the nite.

[myashley89]

Get a Big, Big, mean dog!

LOL!!! Actually we thought about that too!!!

[MamaFairal]

did they move out yet?

[Bahet]

She's either joyously dancing around her house or she's at a seedy bar trying to find out how much it will cost to have a guy named Tank "convince" them to leave.

[myashley89]

Yes it is official!!!! They are GONE!!!! Not so much as a bye or an I'm sorry either....well pfffft....and it seems like a weight has been lifted! I finally have my home back!!

:wings :happy

[iluvmybaby]

Yes it is official!!!! They are GONE!!!! Not so much as a bye or an I'm sorry either....well pfffft....and it seems like a weight has been lifted! I finally have my home back!!

:wings :happy

How did you get rid of them?

[myashley89]

How did you get rid of them?

Actually they just left on their own....them & mil got a place together....

[Jackie_Blu]

Congratulations, sweetie!!!!:dancing: :dancing: Thank goodness that's over...you and yours should have a celebration! :hug

[mosdata1]

I am soooo happy for you!

:groupsmilie :groupsmilie :groupsmilie

Now you can have peace in your household again.

[magenta]

I am so very happy for you!

[DAVESBABYDOLL]

Actually they just left on their own....them & mil got a place together....

Now change your locks immediatly !! (Even if they gave all keys back,or had no keys,they could have made a copy)


How's your hubby feel?

[PrincessArky]

Yes it is official!!!! They are GONE!!!! Not so much as a bye or an I'm sorry either....well pfffft....and it seems like a weight has been lifted! I finally have my home back!!

:wings :happy

woohoo time for a party......are we all invited??? lol

[Kelsey1224]

Congrats!!! It will be nice to feel like your home is your's again.

[Bahet]

Congratulations! :)

[ladybugva]

I am glad that they are our and you are free. Hope you restore normalcy soon.

[BeanieLuvR]

Congrats!! I am glad that you finally got your home back. :)

[queenangie]

Congrats and do a happy dance in the livingroom!

Definitely get those locks all changed w/ new keys.