a vent about MIL

[ma4angels]

I have the most selfish MIL I think I have ever met. She lives across the road and never comes to see her grandchildren. The only time they see her is if my husband goes over while I am at work. My sweet little boy never mentiones to go see his grandmother , so my husband did and all she could talk about was some guy. She never once acknowledged that they were there. That is really getting on my last nerve. Does anyone else have terrrible MIL like mine:getyou

[Beso]

My EX MIL was like that. My daughter was the 1st grandkid for her. She never once came to see her in the hospital. Once I got her home, you know you have to feed babies and put diapers on their butts. She claimed I was spending way to much $ on those things. Hello it was the late 90's not the 50's. I asked her once to watch her so I could go to work. Holy cow you'd think I'd asked for a million $$$. After about 4 long years I couldn't take it anymore. Ex was always on mothers side. I walked......daughter is now 11 and hardly see's ex's parents at all. " She once told me, why should she watch grandkids when she raised hers" eeerrrr.... still makes me mad to this day.

As far as my new MIL so far so good, still early.....

[CLARKS4]

My mother in law use to be real good but the last couple years she has gotten bad. After my second daughter was born she started favoring the baby over my other daughter. She always ask about my baby and buys stuff for the baby, only acknowledges my baby daughter and never my oldest any more. My oldest is almost 9 and she sees it. They also think we should always come to their house. If they have to come to ours to see their grandchildren they get upset.

[PrincessArky]

I have the most selfish MIL I think I have ever met. She lives across the road and never comes to see her grandchildren. The only time they see her is if my husband goes over while I am at work. My sweet little boy never mentiones to go see his grandmother , so my husband did and all she could talk about was some guy. She never once acknowledged that they were there. That is really getting on my last nerve. Does anyone else have terrrible MIL like mine:getyou

my MIL lives 9k away so I dont have that problem but add the B word to it and you have MY mother

[Faithfully]

My parents were the same way,:getyou

[sheila_361]

Gosh that is terrible to hear about MIL's that are like that, mine is great!

[lassss]

Yep my MIL is a miserable bitch lol. She is never wrong, she constantly talks about DH's first wife badly..(who passed away from cancer), She constantly tries to run our life, always insists on talking to DH everynight on the phone for hours. She has managed to push everyone out of her life because she fights with everyone. The last straw was when she *tried* to show her fangs in my direction with her rabid verbal attacks. MUUAAHAAAA she saw the Rican side of me come out. Since then DH and I told her where to get off and we wrote her off. We havent heard from her since October..it has been so peaceful :)

[earnhardt1]

my mil is awesome and she is the sweetest woman i have ever met besides my mom and grama

[atprm]

my ex-ass mother in law was more meddling than anything -- the first time she came down for a visit, she rearranged my kitchen to her liking because "that's how my douggie always liked it". It went from there that when my ex-ass was out at sea she tried to call CPS because I wouldn't bring the kids up to "see her" (5 states away).

ahhhhhhhh the good old days......not.


my current MIL is a dream, I love her to pieces (10 years strong). Eventually she will need to live with us, because she has Parkinson's and it's progressively getting worse...and I won't put her in a nursing home. (same thing for my Dad -- I won't put him in a home either).

[tough guy]

my mil is awesome and she is the sweetest woman i have ever met besides my mom and grama


ditto!! I guess i got lucky somehow too:)

[magenta]

I sent my MIL school pics in her Christmas card, she called DH and asked why I did not put their names on them. Hmm, I thought ages and grades were enough.

She always wanted DH with his 1st childs mother.

She seems to think my kids will end up criminals. 14 yr old has air soft guns, so that makes me a bad mother, because he might shoot his sibs. Yeah whatever. My kids are on the honor roll, never been in trouble, DD is in advanced classes, they both excel in CC, DS will most likely be on Varsity in the 9th grade, but DH keeps getting told they will end up bad, you just watch and see.

If she fell off the face of the earth, I wouldn't miss her and neither would my kids. She has seen my youngest, (he will be 6) 2 times.

[Shann]

How sad, what makes people be so awful. I'm not married nor do I have kids but I just cannot see my mother ever acting like that and I hope that if I ever do get married, my MIL is not a bitch, honestly that might be a deal breaker to me, I don't know that I could be w/ someone knowing their mother hated me b/c like some of you have stated chances are he would side w/ his mother and that doesn't fly w/ me.

[PrincessArky]

How sad, what makes people be so awful. I'm not married nor do I have kids but I just cannot see my mother ever acting like that and I hope that if I ever do get married, my MIL is not a bitch, honestly that might be a deal breaker to me, I don't know that I could be w/ someone knowing their mother hated me b/c like some of you have stated chances are he would side w/ his mother and that doesn't fly w/ me.

I always told my hubby had I met his mother first I would not have married him. No doubt if we lived anywhere near each other we wouldnt be today

[galeane29]

My 1st MIL was a ...well there are just no names/words how to describe this woman. I was married to her one and only son who passed away a little over 7 years ago. She told me that I would never be good enough for her son and wanted nothing to do with our kids ( we had 2 together) and 7 years after his death she still has nothing to do with them. Same goes for all my sister in laws and FIL. They are basically acting like my kids do not exist.

[hblueeyes]

My MIL was a horror story too. Hubby usually sided with her. She treated all her kids like crap but my hubby got it worse. Him and his siblings would trip over themselves to kiss her ass. I finally told my hubby that if him and his bros and sises did not have her unconditional love by now then they never would and to give up trying. The one son that told her off then moved to florida was the one my MIL would trip herself over to kiss his butt.

I have 4 sons. I can tell you right now, I would make nice to please my DIL and my son just so I can assure my place in my grandkids life.

Me

[iluvmybaby]

I have the most selfish MIL I think I have ever met. She lives across the road and never comes to see her grandchildren. The only time they see her is if my husband goes over while I am at work. My sweet little boy never mentiones to go see his grandmother , so my husband did and all she could talk about was some guy. She never once acknowledged that they were there. That is really getting on my last nerve. Does anyone else have terrrible MIL like mine:getyou

Be glad she doesnt come over, she seems like a big @$$


My MIL was a horror story too. Hubby usually sided with her

My exhubby came out of her 33 years ago and spend the rest of his life trying to crawl back in, he ALWAYS sided with her

[ssgjeg]

Are some of you sure we're not related. My mother has basically told me that if anything happens to me and dh that my kids will go to foster care. She told me that she and my stepdad have their life the way they want it now and kids don't fit in it. We live 300 miles away and she has been to my house once. I rent a car once a year so my kids can spend spring break at her house. She dotes all over them until somebody, anybody, else shows up. Then she pretty much ignores them. She has never sent them a birthday card or called on their birthday. She only sends presents at christmas and then complains that their too expensive (my kids asked for pants and slippers this year).

Now are some of you sure you're not married to one of my brothers?

[ma4angels]

I figured that I couldn't be the only person with the MIL from H-ll. I do not wish this on anyone. My Dh talked to a family member today about all the things this woman has been putting her son that is still at home through. She is always telling him that he will never amount to nothing. This poor fellow is 24 and end going insane because of her. I just really dislike this woman. She was talking about getting married to someone see met online. If she does and moves away it would be a blessing to us all.

[Mystica131]

After 10 years of CRAP, I finally told my husband this past month that his mother is dead to me. He's an only child and this woman is nuts. It's obvious she only wanted us to have kids so she would be able to tell people she has grandkids. We are a possession to her. She was upset when we decided to have only two kids, but she constantly says that DH never acted like my two boys do-- DUH, you only had one, stupid. They don't act like that when they're alone.

This is the woman who walked out of one house, leaving it full of everything, and bought another house 3 hours away and started filling it up with loads of stuff. We had to empty the first one out and sell it for them after it sat there about 15 years. Now they are in an assisted living facility and we are doing the same thing with the newer one. It must be nice to sit on your butt and have others do EVERYTHING for you. Gotta go check my blood pressure again. Just thinking of her makes my blood boil. . . . . . .

[ma4angels]

After 10 years of CRAP, I finally told my husband this past month that his mother is dead to me. He's an only child and this woman is nuts. It's obvious she only wanted us to have kids so she would be able to tell people she has grandkids. We are a possession to her. She was upset when we decided to have only two kids, but she constantly says that DH never acted like my two boys do-- DUH, you only had one, stupid. They don't act like that when they're alone.

This is the woman who walked out of one house, leaving it full of everything, and bought another house 3 hours away and started filling it up with loads of stuff. We had to empty the first one out and sell it for them after it sat there about 15 years. Now they are in an assisted living facility and we are doing the same thing with the newer one. It must be nice to sit on your butt and have others do EVERYTHING for you. Gotta go check my blood pressure again. Just thinking of her makes my blood boil. . . . . . .


I think all of the MIL like mine and yours have to be related. After reading about everybody elses MIL I know that I am not alone in my twilight zone world. I basically told my DH that my MIL was nothing to me anymore. One thing that she has always done that really makes me scream is that she has always let my DH ex live in come over to chat it started two years after we were married. She never liked this women from the start she talked crap about her now they are best friends. MY DH through a fit and so did I but she keeps her coming over there. So I have to look at this stupid ho sitting on my MIL porch. That is when she became nothing to me. I am married to her son and gave birth to her grandkids. This is the kind of disrespect she shows her son and me. I don't ever go over there anymore and I told my DH that I didn't want my kids over anymore either. I am just so tired of the bull she feeds everyone.:getyou

This is what I would like to do to her head:slap

[tracey74]

well i cant say that about my MIL(may she rest in peace) she was a great person her and my DH stepdad treated my kids great my son was the first born grandkid on both sides of the family and my DH's parents treated him a hell of a lot better than my mom ever did.cant say too much about my dad because of my mothers BS we moved back up to where DH was born and raised.anyway my kids were the first 2 grandkids born and my mother til this day does not come to see them nor has she EVER bought them anything not even for christmas when she did have the money. but yet she would buy my other sisters kids stuff(one sister has 2 boys and my other sister who was murdered had one) she even brought my other sister's (i have 4 altogether) 2 kids stuff and did stuff for them when we needed stuff and I mean truly needed we got squat. I even let her live here when she got evicted almost 5 years ago(she was living with my one sister who moved out of state) it was her and my sister(the one who was murdered) and she promised to help pay bills,groceries,etc. she did laundry but hardly she cooked once and cleaned once all in about 3 months time. (a whole lot of story to this but) NOW she has been evicted again and living with the one sister I claim as dead to me(long story) and mom has the nerve to call the other sister i do talk to that WE never took her in,WE never did anything for her,blah blah blah we did more for her that the sister she lives with now. and she had the nerve to tell me her excuse for never seeing my kids was because my sister who I claim as dead to me told her she wasnt allowed to see my kids because she drank I told her I never said that what I said was I dont allow alcohol in my home (which I dont) and that she has to be sober to come see them and that Id never let her spend time with them at her house when she was drinking which is all the time. but anyway my mom IS a MIL from hell.hubby cant stand her because of how she treats our kids and myself like crap and her lies to make it look like shes the victim in everything. so i kinda see what you all see except this MIL is my mother.

[buglebe]

It's hard to believe there are so many women who care so little about their grandchildren. I am like the person who said they would bend over backwards to make sure their daughter in laws liked her so she could see the kids. My son in law's mom is like that. She isn't ugly or anything , she just doesn't show much interest in the children. But she seems to love them when they go to visit her but she makes very little effort to see them. This is great for me, it gives me more time with them.

[ssgjeg]

It's hard to believe there are so many women who care so little about their grandchildren. I am like the person who said they would bend over backwards to make sure their daughter in laws liked her so she could see the kids. My son in law's mom is like that. She isn't ugly or anything , she just doesn't show much interest in the children. But she seems to love them when they go to visit her but she makes very little effort to see them. This is great for me, it gives me more time with them.

Buglebe, I think that in some cases (like my mother) they never really wanted the children so why be interested in the grandchildren? The only grandchildren that my mother is interested in are my stepbrothers children and they aren't even actually any blood relation to her.

Now psychiatrists may say that these women have trouble showing emotion or that they don't know how to love. I don't know about them but I do know that with my mother it's selective love. She only cares about one of her 3 kids and her 2 stepchildren (1 of whom is dead) and certain grandchildren. She never has and never will love equally.

I've found the key is to let the children figure it out for themselves. My oldest 2 have figured her out and realize if they don't expect anything from her then they can't get disappointed by her.

[PrincessArky]

Buglebe, I think that in some cases (like my mother) they never really wanted the children so why be interested in the grandchildren? The only grandchildren that my mother is interested in are my stepbrothers children and they aren't even actually any blood relation to her.

Now psychiatrists may say that these women have trouble showing emotion or that they don't know how to love. I don't know about them but I do know that with my mother it's selective love. She only cares about one of her 3 kids and her 2 stepchildren (1 of whom is dead) and certain grandchildren. She never has and never will love equally.

I've found the key is to let the children figure it out for themselves. My oldest 2 have figured her out and realize if they don't expect anything from her then they can't get disappointed by her.

are you sure we dont have the same mom? lol she never wanted us either but my dad did........she did walk once w/out 2 of us but was "guilted" into coming back I have to say that I wish she had left us all and stayed gone

[ssgjeg]

My mother never left but I wish she had of so that my grandparents could have raised me. My grandfather used to say that she was a changeling or that the hospital gave them the wrong baby. How two sweet people like that ever had a child like her is beyond me.

[PrincessArky]

My mother never left but I wish she had of so that my grandparents could have raised me. My grandfather used to say that she was a changeling or that the hospital gave them the wrong baby. How two sweet people like that ever had a child like her is beyond me.

wow thats great you had grandparents that were good I had one grandmother and she was just like my mom

[tigger4]

My MIL is a real winner. She sends my BIL huge Christmas gifts, but nothing for my husband. She says it is because my DH has kids and it wouldn't be fair to BIL to buy for DH and DH's kids. Then, she gets my kids cheap gifts.

She and her husband let his only Grandchild go to foster care and be adopted out because they didn't want to deal with kids. I was floored.

She sat at step FIL's son's funeral and said she was surprised that he had committed suicide she always figured the cops would kill him.

I try to avoid her and my husband has to pay my kids to visit her.

[ma4angels]

I was married once before and had the only grandchild on the daddy's side of the family. She told someone before my daughter was born that she wasn't going to be this childs grandmother she was going to let my mother be that this time. I said what the h-ll you don't have any other grandkids. She had several boys that were not her blood grandchildren in her life at the time. They said that she made the worst face when she was told that my child was a girl because the doctor told us that it was a boy. She was so disappointed. Well 17 years later she can't understand why my child can't stand to be around her. :getyou Hello Hello is anyone home in that head why do you think she doesn't like you. But my current MIL is 10 worse. Go figure that out of two marriage I end up with Dumb and Dumber How lucky can a girl get. I told my DH that we needed to adopt a set of grandparents for my kids.

[moe265]

My daughter's "Betty" (she refuses to call her Grandma) will not see her because she is mad at me for leaving her son alcholic, abusive, cheating son. This happened 11 years ago and to this day she "will not have my daughter pushed on her". My daughter hasn't seen her in 11 years and was willing to meet her at her aunt's house and she refused. Her daughter's children are the chosen ones and my daughter and her 5 other grandchildren don't get the time of day. This lady makes my blood boil.

[Army-Mom]

I really cant understand why these women would be this way to their grandbabies..I love mine so much..they are our little angels. I loved my mother in law so much. She was my best friend..I would just go over and sit with her all day while hubby was at work..and I was with her helping take care of her at home till the day she died. I promised her she wouldn NOT die in a nursing home and she didnt..Rest in Pease mama G

[babydoll_jen]

I believe I have the greatest MIL in the world. For the past 13 years she has been with me through life, death, sickness, happiness.......If I were to call her up right now and ask her if she would come and help me around the house or take me to the store, she would be here in a heartbeat. Oh, and my FIL, he is as great as she is.

[ma4angels]

I believe I have the greatest MIL in the world. For the past 13 years she has been with me through life, death, sickness, happiness.......If I were to call her up right now and ask her if she would come and help me around the house or take me to the store, she would be here in a heartbeat. Oh, and my FIL, he is as great as she is.

Then you are blessed in life with that. I am really glad that someone has a good set of in-laws. MY FIL passed away a while back and he wasn't that bad. He showed interest in his grandchildren. It was just bad because in the end he didn't even know his own children. It is really sad because I feel for my husband when the women does all these stupid things. He gets so angry and hurt. He has been dealing with this mess for along time. He really hates what she is doing to our children. But you can't make someone change their ways.

[bobcats]

I too have one of them famous mil's from hell ( who says she a christian) I should of known before we got married how it would be. I met her while going out with her nephew she was always mean and nasty to everyone never a nice word to say to or about anyone. Jump me one day saying I was shaking my boobs at her husband. Months later after I broke up with him she called to invite me to dinner at her house I was awkward about saying no so I went. Later I learned she convinced her son to ask me out which he did and we been together 31 years.At our wedding I said fooling around this was her fault she said "she thought he knew where to get a piece of a** without having to marry it. She has cause us to break up & many fights over the years.She never cared for my daughter who is from my 1st marriage but my husband legally adopted & loves more than I can say,never any christmas,or birthday gifts. Has told others how homely our grandkids are. Now she's 87 and has lung disease on oxygen 24/7 has had two stints put in her heart(surprized they even found one) She wants to come live with us AGHHHH. :thumpdown: :slapping And stupid me says it's okay (someone shoot me) because I love my husband and I am a christian and I know it's the right thing to do (and hopefully I'll be rewarded some other way and how long can it be?) I know I'm nuts

[hblueeyes]

Okay, now that the error of your ways has sunk in it is not too late to cover your butt. Get things in writing. Make a written contract as to what is expected and what she must do or the deal is off. It may nort legally be enforceable but it will put her on notice and you will show her that you are the alpha female in your home. Tell hubby if he cannot contribute reasonably then he must butt out.

My mom is that MIL from hell. She is the mother from hell and the wife from hell.

I have lived in her house for the last 17 years. We paid no rent but paid the taxes, insurance and did all the up keep, repairs and upgrades. During this time we made the 100 mile trip (one way) to her house to help them with lawn mowing, upkeep, repairs etc. We never received so much as a thank you. She put ad addition on her house and in March 2007 she moved back in so I could care for her hubby and assist them as well as drive them to their doctors appointments,shopping etc. Again no thank yous or so much as an offer for gas for the car. We pay all utilities and expenses. After they were in for 1 month, the way things were supposed to be changed. I had to remove all my thgings from the kitchen as she wanted her things in the cabinets. I refuse to cook with her things or eat off her dishes. She cleans nothing and most of her junk is funky. I now cook off hot plates, electric skillets etc. The last straw was when she refused to buy green and red pepers for the pepper steak I was making for dinner. I up til then was buying the food and snacks. Her and hubby would eat all the snacks then bring out the ones she had bought after ours were gone. We then had to buy a fridge and a cabinet for food which we know lock after food started to disappear. They both make much more than we do and she banks all their money while we scrounge trying to get by. There are 5 of us and just the 2 of them. She blasts the tv when she cannot sleep at 5 am. Her boxes made my hubby and son sick because of all the mold and rodents feces they are covered in and then she complained as we got rid of the infested boxes. She will not throw anything away even if it is broke. She screams at her hubby and will not feed him if he does not shave. He had a stroke, heart attack and has a yhard time raising his arms but she does not care. She makes him do the laundry and he has fallen down the basement stairs 3 times since they moved in. He walks with a walker so stairs are a challenge for him. I have spoken to his doctor and are trying to get him in the veterans nursing home but there is a long waiting list.

When I mention things to her she says she does not remember the rules. Never heard of it before. So if I had it in writing with her siggy it would be something. Hubby and I cannot wait to move. He has 1 semester of school left and are hoping we can get out as soon as we can. I am ready to pitch a tent in the woods. At least we'd be together and happy. Her vial evilness is far stronger than our kill her with kindness plan.

She name calls, tries to get my kids to do things they are not allowed to do. Tells us we are the reason she screams at her hubby, (she has been doing this since I was a kid) kicks us out weekly, tells us her cat is the only thing she loves, expects me to buy her lunch whenever I take her to the store and lashes out when I tell her I cannot afford to. She never asks how we are when we are obviously sick and I will stake my life on the fact that tomorrow she will be screaming about going to the store because I have been held up for the last 3 days depressed over our situation. She raves about my brother whom does nothing for her except deplete her money but she always favored her boys but they are nowhere unless they want something.

If you can get out of having her around I say do it. But beware, she will not get nicer.

Me