It's amazing -- well not really -- it's actually kind of sad.

[atprm]

It's amazing ... how many people will "pretend" to be your friend, as long as they think that you have something they want.

When you don't or aren't around (online perspective), no one IM's you, no one emails you, no one calls you...yet you thought you had established a friendship.

I am speaking specifically of another website, where I received a 7 day "vacation" for calling a royal gunch on the site a GUNCH. Did I deserve a vacation? Yes I did -- www.urbandictionary.com (look up the word Gunch...I like definition number 6). Did it need to be said? Absolutely.

But... back to the vent/bitch -- several people of website and I developed friendships outside of the website, and as soon as they heard (from me) that I am on, um, vacation, have since not had anything to say -- no emails, no calls, no IM's. (these were IRL friendships where we would constantly call on the phone, share deals, source out other deals, go shopping together, etc)

Yet before all this transpired, im after im... looking for shit that I have -- winetags, deals, coupons, and most of all MCR codes.

How does it make me feel? Used. Very Used. How would that make you guys feel? Probably the same way. These are not internet only relationships -- these are real-life relationships that were formed initially online.

So now I am sitting on twenty 20 point flaps and 32 red caps I found today at Meijers... thinking about sharing them with my "friends"...until this thought came into my mind...

not one person has said anything since I started my vacation, so why should I feel compelled to share with them? Who is benefiting from this friendship -- certainly not me.

Thanks for reading and sharing your opinion --

[ahippiechic]

I know exactly how you feel. Several years ago, I thought I had made some pretty good friends here at BBS. Then I got banned. (And I didn't even call anyone a gunch!) I thought oh well, I can still get the freebies and I talked to a lot of the people other places, on mIRC, ICQ, Yahoo etc so nothing's changed. Except for a very few (who I am still close friends with now), no one msged me, IM'ed me hit me up on mIRC. It's like once I was gone from the board they totally forgot all the PC help I gave them, the graphix I made them, the free-of-charge photo editing of their familes etc.

Then after a year, when I was unabnned, they were like "oh my God, I missed you so bad...can you help me with......"

WTFE. Nope. I have no more use for them. Save your flaps and caps for someone who actually likes YOU and not just what you do for them.


And sorry for kinda ranting in your thread!

[freeby4me]

No clues or ideas, just wanted to post (((HUGS)))

[BeanieLuvR]

I think that you have every right to feel the way that you do. I would not share what you found with them. If they were your true friends it wouldn't matter that you are on a little vacation from that site. I am sorry to hear that they are treating you like that. Hugs.

[BlueBerriTerri]

Sorry that happened to you, people can really suck sometimes--but thanks for adding a new word to my vocabulary!

[DBackFan]

I know exactly how you feel and don't blame you a bit. There are a couple people here who always want my RAOK's or that I have done special things for (one I just gave a huge item too) and then you let them know you have an ISO they are looking for or something similar and they either don't even respond which is rude or IM you back and say "oh I was hoping for it cheaper". Sorry I am not here to give stuff away. I do it when I can but hey don't EXPECT it.

We are all here for good deals but some just take advantage.

[Beso]

I am so sorry, so all seem like great people. I am new here, and now am a little scared. People could actually be rude, yikes. Again I am sorry, I would hope noone would ever do that again to you/

[ahippiechic]

I am so sorry, so all seem like great people. I am new here, and now am a little scared. People could actually be rude, yikes. Again I am sorry, I would hope noone would ever do that again to you/

If you hang around here (or most any other large msg board) just don't take things too personally. People get rude here sometimes, but the good usually outweighs the bad.

[YankeeMary]

I know exactly how you feel. Several years ago, I thought I had made some pretty good friends here at BBS. Then I got banned. (And I didn't even call anyone a gunch!) I thought oh well, I can still get the freebies and I talked to a lot of the people other places, on mIRC, ICQ, Yahoo etc so nothing's changed. Except for a very few (who I am still close friends with now), no one msged me, IM'ed me hit me up on mIRC. It's like once I was gone from the board they totally forgot all the PC help I gave them, the graphix I made them, the free-of-charge photo editing of their familes etc.

Then after a year, when I was unabnned, they were like "oh my God, I missed you so bad...can you help me with......"

WTFE. Nope. I have no more use for them. Save your flaps and caps for someone who actually likes YOU and not just what you do for them.


And sorry for kinda ranting in your thread!

WOW its so good to see you, where have you been? I missed you. Did you finish that graphic for me yet friend??? LOL...just kinding of course...sometimes you just gotta.



ATPRM I am sorry you have been done this way, possibly they just have issues in their life that doesn't give them the free time they once had??? I hope thats the case. No matter what just try to remember that you are a good guy (ok girl) and you in the end are great for being you.

[PrincessArky]

Oh I am sorry this has happened.......dont really know what to say as nothing like this has ever happened to me I have only ever met one person in person that I met online and I married him lol

[YYounghouse]

I know exactly how you feel. Several years ago, I thought I had made some pretty good friends here at BBS. Then I got banned. (And I didn't even call anyone a gunch!) I thought oh well, I can still get the freebies and I talked to a lot of the people other places, on mIRC, ICQ, Yahoo etc so nothing's changed. Except for a very few (who I am still close friends with now), no one msged me, IM'ed me hit me up on mIRC. It's like once I was gone from the board they totally forgot all the PC help I gave them, the graphix I made them, the free-of-charge photo editing of their familes etc.

Then after a year, when I was unabnned, they were like "oh my God, I missed you so bad...can you help me with......"

WTFE. Nope. I have no more use for them. Save your flaps and caps for someone who actually likes YOU and not just what you do for them.


And sorry for kinda ranting in your thread!


sorry too for jumping in this thread...but Hippiechick...I never knew you were banned. You know I am a "mostly lurker" but I did wonder where you went. I go weeks without looking at Vent/Whine...I always look at Off Topic Chat. I am shocked you were banned...but anyway...that is all behind you now. You are so important to the board and to so many members.

[jalex]

I always say...you never know your true friends until you don't have anything..and if they still stick with you, you can call them friend.

Sorry that happened to you guys...I don't have many friends, but the ones I have, I can count on anytime.

And ahippiechic....I did not know you were banned either...but then again, I just started coming back here after being gone for at least 2 years...

This is a strange place....

[jalex]

Sorry to hear that....
I always say that you never truely know who your REAL friends are until you really need them.

And....I did not know you were banned, hippie! But then again, I just recently returned after being gone for at least 2 years.

[cabby92]

Several years ago I was a member of a board that had spun off from an original board. We were all close - talked on the phone, sent cards and presents, just as good of friends as you could be with the distance between you. The owner of the board was a psycho at best, then she just went totally insane and caused all sorts of trouble. When a couple of us called her on it she banned us. Like your story, the rest just dropped us like a stone. I have since gotten back into contact with some of them (after they too got stung) but it will never be like it was. It really hurt.

[tngirl]

Yeah, know the feeling, been there done that.

[atprm]

I can't say that I am heartbroken or even upset over the last 2 days of events.

I, did, afterall deserve a vacation -- but... at the same time as a vacation, it really gives reflection to who these people are.

What shocked me yesterday, was, while lurking on the site (you can read everything without being logged in), and idea that I came up with and suggested to my "friend" in person.... had been implemented 1 day after my vacation started! And guess who didn't get any credit for coming up with the idea?

So now they will swoon and tell this guy how great he is, blah, blah, blah.

What a bunch of bullshit.


It's amazing how two-faced some people can be -- more and more everyday, and how less trusting I have become over the years.

Anyway, that's the latest update from "my friends" -- sad huh?

[JewRican]

And then you have me the bad friend with the phone phobia. I'll call you tonight, ok? :hug

[atprm]

You know... I should really be fucking pissed off at you. I have called and called and called and all I get is a stupid fucking answering machine that you never listen to messages on.

But for some reason, I have come to accept the rejection from you (I don't know what's worse). I have called to tell you I got a job -- and now no winetag or tearpad is safe if I am in the building. LOL

[Memedav]

Well look at it this way....this is a good way to really see who is your friend and who isn't. When my daughter was going through cancer, I learned the hard way who I could lean on and who I couldn't. I was left with only a few true friends. Heck, I didn't even receive a phone call from my sister, who just happens to be a minister! I still harbor some ill-feelings with that one....

[atprm]

* updating this thread with the following disclaimer *

this is not a thread that I created looking for sympathy. What I said to get me a vacation was justified and handled with the right punishment.

My intent for the post, was just another way to say that it's taken me YEARS to figure out that not everyone you meet online (or off) has the same intentions that you do -- friendship being one of them, and that way too many people are in for themselves.

I am absolutely sure that several people will read this in the future, and know EXACTLY who the players are that I am speaking about without the mention of names, since several from there are also on this board.

Without a doubt the rumors will lead back to the person that I called a gunch...and I stand by my statement...that will never ever change.

It's a pattern of behavior too, that whenever she gets in trouble, her big bad husband shows up like a Knight in shining armor to reclaim his horse. .. so it's either that or she is giving virtual head to a moderator or two, since she has arguments and "tattles" on anyone for brownie points and never gets in trouble herself -- and that would include her little fiasco of trolling Fat Wallet.

So, yeah, a gunch is a gunch --

Please don't pity me though -- I am not sorry for saying what I did, and have no problems with the vacation time (except that I wish it were paid).

[kabcrisp]

no thoughts. . .but (((hugs)))

On a side note, I love saying the word "gunch".

Um, It is officially in my vocab for 2008.

[tngirl]

no thoughts. . .but (((hugs)))

On a side note, I love saying the word "gunch".

Um, It is officially in my vocab for 2008.
I finally looked it up and I have to honestly say that I had never heard of the word. I guess we all learn something new everyday.

[ahippiechic]

YYounghouse - Thank you.


Mary, you are such a lovable smart-ass.

[JewRican]

You know... I should really be fucking pissed off at you. I have called and called and called and all I get is a stupid fucking answering machine that you never listen to messages on.

But for some reason, I have come to accept the rejection from you (I don't know what's worse). I have called to tell you I got a job -- and now no winetag or tearpad is safe if I am in the building. LOL

Yeah, but you know my ass ain't going anywhere and I'll answer or call eventually. BTW, got a nasty e-mail from dad over not calling today! :slap

[azwup05]

Its the basic golden rule thing. I guess I would be considered a lurker because I am more comfortable keeping my distance due to past experiences. But I have tried to keep that rule in every aspect of my life, looking at the big picture. Don't let the ones you run into ruin your ideals, sometimes people need to be called out.

[buglebe]

* updating this thread with the following disclaimer *

this is not a thread that I created looking for sympathy. What I said to get me a vacation was justified and handled with the right punishment.

My intent for the post, was just another way to say that it's taken me YEARS to figure out that not everyone you meet online (or off) has the same intentions that you do -- friendship being one of them, and that way too many people are in for themselves.

I am absolutely sure that several people will read this in the future, and know EXACTLY who the players are that I am speaking about without the mention of names, since several from there are also on this board.

Without a doubt the rumors will lead back to the person that I called a gunch...and I stand by my statement...that will never ever change.

It's a pattern of behavior too, that whenever she gets in trouble, her big bad husband shows up like a Knight in shining armor to reclaim his horse. .. so it's either that or she is giving virtual head to a moderator or two, since she has arguments and "tattles" on anyone for brownie points and never gets in trouble herself -- and that would include her little fiasco of trolling Fat Wallet.

So, yeah, a gunch is a gunch --

Please don't pity me though -- I am not sorry for saying what I did, and have no problems with the vacation time (except that I wish it were paid).

I don't know what board you go to but it sounds exciting! LOL I must be missing out.

[atprm]

most days it's a popcorn toting event. LOL

[mosdata1]

I don't know what board you go to but it sounds exciting! LOL I must be missing out.

I was just thinking the same thing!

[Bliss]

It's amazing ... how many people will "pretend" to be your friend, as long as they think that you have something they want.

When you don't or aren't around (online perspective), no one IM's you, no one emails you, no one calls you...yet you thought you had established a friendship. --

FFunny thing is,I've never looked at anyone I chat with online as friends. I guess I prefer "offline" friendship over online.

[pepperpot]

Yeah, know the feeling, been there done that.

Oh tngirl, I haven't seen you much lately....where have you been?.....



















































http://images.art.com/images/-/Bart-Simpson---Eat-My-Shorts-Poster-C10099745.jpeg

No really, I did miss you! :slap

PM me sometime....;)

Hey my friend.....http://www.bigbigforums.com/image.php?u=54532&type=sigpic&dateline=1199421275 "your" is the wrong "your" :lol

[baragabrat]

I was also banned from here a few years ago and a bunch of us went elsewhere. We were all "close." One thing led to another and other boards were opened and more "friends" made. What crap!

While I think it's absolutely possible to make real friends (not online friends/aquaintances) online, it's not the norm. I learned alot through all that and am very careful today. I will NOT allow myself out there to be shit on again. I speak up for myself now and will not let myself be led around by the nose.

Tough way to learn a lesson, huh?