Death in family info please

[newgranny]

I need some information and help. My uncle past away Friday. He had been telling me for the last 8 yrs I was his sole benificary. He lives several hundred miles away and haven't been able to be there . But I did call regulary he had been staying at her house for the last month because he could not climb the steps into his own. I just found out that he had been in the hospital the last few days and that is where he died.
His girlfrind is already saying that he told her that he left all to her. My feelings are what ever he had wrote in his will is the way it goes but she is already planning on going in and "cleaning house" I didn't think any one was able to do anything until reading of the will and probate.

I know he has a will locked up but doesn't the lawyer usually keep a copy? Isn't it up to him to notify people of their inheritance? One day she tells me she knows he has a will and executor and then the next she says he told her blah blah blah. And that she is going to go into the house Monday and start cleaning up. She also said that she knows there would be a few personal item I would probably want. I felt like telling her exactly what I thought but bit my toung thinking little does she know there are items that have already been signed over to me several yrs ago which I have paper work for and proof.

It took me a while to get his lawyers name out of her and am planning on giving him a call Monday morning I don't think he even knows what happend But can't you get in trouble for entering a deceased house without knowing or been informed that it will be turned over to you?

Sorry if this seems scrambled but it's only been a couple days and I am very overwhelmed.

[cpbaby]

I hate to say this, but if you arent there to get your stuiff(the things that have been signed over to you), she can take it and sell it and there is really not alot you can do but bring charges. What I mean is, you probably wont get your things back and to me, that is what I would want, the items with meaning to them.

Unless you can go there now, the most you can do at this point is call the local sheriff's office and explain the situation and PRAY they are willing to help. It doesnt really matter if it is illegal if she does go in and take everything, once she has it, if she sells it, its pretty much gone and charges are all that can be brought and probably restitution ordered, but that wont bring back the personal items/memories.


I am very sorry for your loss.

[newgranny]

I called the state police they say it's a civil matter which I will take up with his lawyer tomorrow. Also the items that are mine could bring federal charges if I report them stolen . Hubby thinks I should go up there and change the locks this will also be discussed with the lawyer. She also has several of his credit cards in her possion along with his check book. The way I see it the lady is in for big trouble. I will see what the lawyer says and I just may call her and let the cat out of the bag for what I know to be in the will and tell her to stay the hell out she has never been family only a girl friend and in this state I believe even if their wasn't a will the state would take it and pass it down the line

[andreame70]

I think you should go up there today and change the locks. I wouldn't wait until Monday, it may be too late. Yes, you could press federal charges if she takes the stuff, but which would you really rather have, the things or the charges against her? If she takes the stuff, chances are most of it will be gone before the charges against her come before a court. At that point, you may get a judgment against her for whatever the court thinks the current value of it is and since most of it is probably more sentimental value than anything, you would lose out on a lot. A judgment itself, is pretty useless unless the person has some property or something of value that it can be placed against and just because you have a judgment against someone, it doesn't necessarily mean that you will ever see a penny of the money.

Who is handling the arrangements and such? As the sole beneficiary, wouldn't you want to be involved in that? That brings me back to wondering why you have not already gone. Also, if you have the info for the attorney, call him now. I am sure that he has an answering service and you may be able to speak to him today instead of waiting until tomorrow.

Sorry for your loss and I hope it all works out.

Andrea

[newgranny]

It's not just things that are involved. The house and property all of which he told me yrs ago was going to mine and within the last 6 months we had talked about it. To me that is tresspassing if indeed I am in the will as sole beneficary. Even if not it is totally disrespectful to all family memebers involved to go into a house like that just by something that may have been said. Or interpertited as being said to suit ones wishes. Even if he had changed the will for some reson I would abide by his wishes. I just feel things should be left alone until all is said and done. I will talk to his lawyer and ask him to adviser her to stay away until the reading and if necessary I will go change locks and whatever else to keep her out. If she is alowed in so am I and I can do what ever I want too. I really hate this when people get so greedy after a death and can't wait for thing to go thru the process

[tracey74]

well.first of all Id get a copy of his death certificate and cancel his credit cards and checking acct.they are going to want proof of his death.that way here she cant use them.also legally if he named you as sole heir in his will all she can do is contest it.she can sell stuff but then it wouldnt be legally.same thing happened with my grandma.I know she had a will but she went to live with my aunt then my cousin and me and my mom and sisters got nothing.there was a lawyer but only thing left was money to my mom.supposedly.I was to get family photos and what not my cousin told my sister there was no will.even if there was Im sure NONE of her good stuff is around.Im sure they sold it.he tried telling me she gave most of it away before she moved to live with them.I know better.but anyway.seems like the lawyer would have gotten a hold of you by now if he had one and a will.most likely the police will want some proof that you are the sole heir of his estate.my friends dad dies years ago and even tho she was on his checking acct.she had to provide proof of death to close the acct.then they made her pay back whatever she spent(after he died) even tho she was sole heir of everything.so seems like your uncles GF could get into a lot of trouble.again Id talk to the lawyer(are you sure the name she gave you is legit?) and see what you can do.and tell him/her that shes planning on getting rid of stuff.see what they tell you.

[newgranny]

I do plan on cocntacting his county coroner tomorrow morning. I don't know how long it takes to get the initial death certificate, but it would seem that it should go to a relative and not her. i am also contacting his post office tomorrw and having his mail stopped she has no business picking up his mail any more and should be returned. I would bet being close to the 1st of the month she is just waiting for his retirement check to come. I'm not sure if the lawyer knows yet considering this just happened Friday, but I can tell you come 830 in the morning he will know. I know there is a will at his house I cannot imagine the lawyer that helped him write it up not having a copy He told me once that he made sure all the I's were dotted and t's crossed so i couldn't be contested. Atleast not satisfactorily. I looked up the lawyers name she gave me and it is ligit.

[freeby4me]

Im so sorry that things are ending up badly. Please keep us posted :(

[newgranny]

I called the lawyer and Funeral home the funeral home is giving me death certificates and of course the lawyer was not in and never returned my call so I called again today again not in.
so I called her and the lawyer had called her and told her to keep out so we do know that it is the right lawyer. She said she did take care of a few things at the house that she said he had asked her to but that she knew nothing could be done until the actual reading of the will. She asked if I knew if he had a copy of the will and I told her I knew where he had it but I wanted to know if the lawyer had a copy before I went and dug it up. So apparently she doesn't know where it's at.

I told her that the family was upset because we weren't notified he was in the hospital and that it was appearing that she was going by assumption of what he had said, I also told her that she should think about the fact that is mind may not have been up to normal with the medications and also if he was on 30 -40 liters of oxygen, oxygen may not have been getting to the brain. Purely speculation but a good bluff

I thinking there was a forgotten word when he said "I'm leaving everything to you" I think he said or meant I'm leaving everything UP to you" (as far as to who to notify and taking care of final arrangements) but of course wishful minds think what they want

She said she didn't want any hard feelings she was only doing what she thought he had asked her but will go by our wishes

The lawyer is going to call me for sure tomorrow so I will know then everything I can do to make sure she is behaving