Problems with Step-Brother//Those Who Have Kids with Emotional Issues COME ON IN!

[Cowgirlie_in_Tennessee]

Okay... It's like this... I have a 12 year old Step Brother, Josh. My Mom and Step-Dad have been together since 1997, so I've known this kid for a while. :o
Since he was old enough to go to school, he's had problems- lots of problems, mainly emotional but yet the schools over looked it and/or him and let him slide through the system...well not anymore... we just found out that he is definitely without a doubt FAILING 7th Grade :eek: :mad: :o :( and here's the REASONS why- according to all 3 of his teachers, the Vice-Principal, and School Therapist:

* Seems to need "Instant Gratification"
* Lies, Lies and more Lies about doing his homework/tests/study guides
* Is Currently the "Class Clown" and is "Disruptive"

Okay, we can deal with that...but here's the scary part...

* Has written 2 -that we know of- threatening, stalker type letters to 2 different girls in his school... the context : I hate you, you're a B****, You're also a F***ing C***, a W**** and much more. Something along the lines of "wait until I see you alone".
*Teachers and Therapist says he has "Anger" problems, is degrading towards all female classmates (stuff like so and so is a stupid (insert cuss word here) ) and attempts to be aggressive to the teachers if they women and ONLY if they are women.
* Throws temper-tantrums if he doesn't get that instant gratification
* Gets anger if a female classmate answers faster or does better on a test and becomes somewhat aggressive. :eek:

That's just the 1/2 of it...he's very disruptive towards my Mom who trust me takes no guff from anyone, let alone a KID. He's threatened her, he's threatened his Dad, he's threatened his Mom and his 2 Sisters. BUT he won't threaten me. :confused: :confused: :confused: He also have a fasination with GUNS and War Movies, and he thinks WWE Wrestling is "real" and that's "how you should handle a woman" when he saw "Randy Orton" RKO "Stacy Kiebler". :eek:

Any ideas here? They're tried getting him into counselling through the courts but here's the kicker: HIS MOM IS A PROBATION OFFICER AND SOCIAL WORKER who is quite embarassed about this so she has farked the system somehow and got around the court appointed stuff, because he has missed that we KNOW of at least 15 days of school due to "anxiety" and YES the truancy officers have come to his Mom's and My Mom's home looking for him...but Jaime (his Mom) hides him out. He is apparently also voice mailing and text messaging his "friends" at school at like 9 AM saying 'Ha Ha I tricked Mom...I'm not sick...I just stayed up til 3 AM last night!!!" and things like that.

HELP?!? They've already tested him NUMEROUS times and the kid does not seem to have any disabilities, as far as learning disabilities go but his MOM will NOT let them test anything else.

Please reply to this...even just to throw out some comments- I really need to talk about this and you are like family to me!

[renagade]

This is scary. You could be talking about my new step grandson. My son married his mom last summer and he is a terror.Same thing. Mom tries to protect him but he is a awful brat. He hates women for some reason. The two of us have went around a few times. He has shoved me and punched me twice. Hubby let him know right away you don't do that to women. They have put him on zoloft but I don't think its going to help. I really can't give you any advice just prayers. We pray for ours daily. Good luck and God Bless!

[Cowgirlie_in_Tennessee]

Hi, thanks for replying...they've tried putting him on meds and he creates excuses as to why he can't take them. The main thing is his Mom's version of grounding him is to put him in his room with his computer, games, TV. When he comes to my Mom's he has NOTHING, so of course he has no desire to come there. I am literally scared for my Mom...she has major health issues that he is obviously aware of...so he would know what he could do to her to really harm her... she has VERY bad knees, if he pushed her down...it'd be over. :eek:

[YankeeMary]

The best advice I could possibly think of is NEVER GIVE UP!!! Keep calling and calling anyone whom will listen. The schools, start at the top, talk to the director of education at the school, generally they are wonderful people and love kids. When he hits your mom call the police. No one is "allowed" to hit anyone at any time, unless it is self defense which doesn't seem to be the case here. The kid has some serious problems going on and if the real mom won't do anything then his father should step up to the plate and be a man. If the police get involved then the mom shouldn't be able to "destroy" police reports. Don't get me wrong I am all for treatment and not jail for those with mental disabilities, but you have to start somewhere. If this boy isn't gotten a hold of soon, then it will be prison when he is older. I know how hard it is to get a parent to admit their child NEEDS help, I live it. Contact the local child advocate office, call anyone you can think of until help is obtained. I really feel for you all and you have my prayers. There is always hope, just don't give up. The boy deserves to live a happy normal productive life as well as the entire family. HUGS!!!

[Tasha405]

He sounds a lot like my son, except for the threats to all women. My son also has anger problems along with poor grades, lies and being the class clown.

I don't have any advice because I've tried everything under the sun and nothing has worked for my son. All I know to say is keep trying and don't give up on him.

(((Hugs)))

[irrelevant0]

if he hates women this much, then one of 2 things is probably going on:

1) he has been abused or hurt badly by a female

or

2) he feels inferior or intimidated (can't think of the word i want...)

with either one he is taking his insecurities out on women in general because of one or a few.

or, it could be something totally different. those 2 options are the only ones i can think of, but i am sure there is something else that could be going on.

[Blondiex46]

What a shame there are kids all over that have problems like this and I personally think it is wonderful that you are so concerned. I think one of the major problems is unfortunatelly his mother standing in the way of thing, she is not benefiting him at all AND if something happens where will she be then. You didn't say anything about whether he has an IEP for was even tested for anything. You said medication but what is his diagnosis that he is given the meds for. He needs counseling AND in a place that he will talk, but him not talking and what he is doing is telling enough that there are problems. Some kids do not talk (like mine) but their actions say something. I agree never give up, ask him if there is anything you can do to help him.