Last Comic Standing 8/3 9:00 4600-5300+ pts,

[mficke0713]

What did Jay say about his hair loss book?
*All the pages fell out

What did Gary say about the "nine to five" work day?
*Hated the "nine" but the "five" was nice

What did Kathleen say about taking the SAT?
*Paid to prove her idiocy

What did Kathleen say about having never been challenged?
*Felt like "the crazy lady" in house

What did John say about young men?
*Guarded the women they talked to

What did Tammy say about Paris Hilton?
*Broke down barriers for rich people

What did Jay say about being on the show?
*Was never in this size "ball park"

What did John say about one woman he met?
*She had to work in three days

What did Alonzo say was his goal as a comedian?
*Wanted simply to "own the room"

What did John say he did before he went on stage?
*Worried only about his looks

What did Tammy say about her sister-in-law?
*Wouldn't be able to sue her

What did Gary say about elementary school scissors?
*Couldn't cut anything

What did Jay Mohr say about the winner of the contest?
*Got own television special

Which network sponsored the television special Jay Mohr said the contest's winner would receive?
*Comedy Central

What did Gary do during his comedy routine?
*Discussed alarm clocks

What Internet company's logo appeared on-screen while Gary discussed alarm clocks?
*NetZero Internet

[mficke0713]

COMMERCIALS:

In a commercial you may have seen, what prevented a man wearing a baseball cap from traveling comfortably on an airplane?
*Brought large trophies with him
*Visa
*"Champions"

[littlel]

Thanks mficke0713! :D


In a commercial during this show, what did a man and woman in business attire do at at a baggage carousel?
Picked up office equipment
FedEx Kinko's
Copy, print, and ship all in once place

In a commercial during this show, who did a man list his requirements for packing and shipping to?
Store clerk
UPS
Can satisfy all your shipping needs

[jatan]

In an advertisement during this program, what did a mother hold a press conference about?
New snack
Nestlé Toll House Candy Bars
Soft cookie

In an advertisement during this program, what did everyone in a suburban town drive?
Construction vehicles
Hyundai Santa Fe
Ten-year warranty

In an advertisement during this program, what did a man and woman do after horsing around on a couch?
* Drank coffee
* Nestlé Coffee-mate
* Comes in many flavors

In a commercial during this show, what did a girl at a computer, a boy mopping a floor, a girl blow-drying her hair, and a group of friends do against brightly colored backgrounds?
Enjoyed their college dorm rooms
Target
Sells decorating supplies

In a commercial during this show, what did a woman in a bikini do after walking on a mountain covered with white sand?
*Dove into swimming pool
*Pantene Pro-V Shampoo & Conditioner
*Light Spray Conditioner

[ixxy]

A commercial during this show featured a group of kids who did what in a subway car?
Threw a party
Smirnoff Ice
Turn it into a party

In a commercial during this show, what happened after a crew of body shop mechanics did a makeover of an old beat up wreck of a car?
*The owner freaked out with happiness when she saw her new car
*Toyota Corolla
*Has so many attractive features "you won't even recognize it"

[exferryguy]

In a commercial during this show, what did students do in a school before riding on a bus with life-size bobblehead character?
Danced to hip-hop music
JCPenney
Carries stylish fashions


In a commercial during this show, what did a blonde man sitting in an office cubicle do while wearing a phone headset and holding a toy basketball?
Answered caller's questions with "no"
Capital One No Hassle Rewards
Airline miles earned are good

[chipmunk]

In a commercial during this show, what did three children discuss as they stood outdoors and held up pants?
Exercising and eating healthy
Subway
Helps you live a long and happy life

In a commercial during this show, what did a little boy use to strike his parents' broken computer?
Toy hammer
America Online 9.0 Optimized
Computer Check-Up

[SaraSmiles]

Thanks!

In a commercial during this show, what did people in various bars do while singing a jolly drinking song?
*Drank water
*Aquafina
*Improves your health

[chicodog]

Thanks !!

In a commercial during this show, what did a woman in white pop into her mouth before lounging around and checking her watch?
Mint
Tic Tac
30% larger

[gibber]

Thanks mficke0713!

In a DVD commercial during this show, what did a teenage girl do with the help of Julie Andrews?
Learned she was royalty
"The Princess Diaries"

In a DVD/VHS commercial during this show, who was Jennifer Garner?
Teenager trapped in adult's body
"13 Going on 30"

In a commercial during this show, what did students do in a school after a life-size bobblehead character walked down the aisle of a school bus?
Danced to hip-hop music
JCPenney
Carries stylish fashions

[humminbird]

In a commercial during this show, what happened as a brunette wearing a pink jacket and black eyeglasses walked down the street and discussed how she was treated in retail stores?
Swarm of bees followed her
Lenscrafters
Take $100 off all glasses