I Can't Believe ... the Principal swatted my son!

[SheriAndy]

First, you should know that this man is new to our school. Two years ago, our principal (whom everyone loved!) died of cancer. This man comes in and starts being a jerk from day one. He has a problem with my son, and no one can figure out why. At the beginning of the year, he called him and his friends in and threatened them with swats, saying that they were mean and unruly and he won't tolerate that. He told them that he would bust their butts and send them home the first chance he got. There was nothing that preceded this event, they weren't in trouble, hadn't been sent by a teacher...nothing. When I confronted him, and advised him that my son had done nothing wrong, he became defensive, started citing the bully laws and said he just wanted to get them ready. When I told him that isn't good enough, he LIED TO ME by saying that my son had been teasing a boy that has cancer and is recovering. This is the same boy that is a friend to my son...when his hair started falling out, he went to the local barber and had his head shaved so John wouldn't feel bad. When I asked John, he said that nothing had happened. I tried to talk to the principal again, but he wouldn't even listen to me. So, my husband and I decided to sign a paper saying that he cannot discipline my son. Instead, we are to be called, and if a resolution isn't reached, he will be expelled. Today, a teachers aide sent 8 students to the office. The principal only kept my son and one other boy there. The other boy threw a pencil at my son, at which point the principal yanked them both into the office, screaming (he was). He slammed the door (my son said so hard he thought it was going to come off the hinges), and when he started swatting them (with a wooden paddle) he laughed. I am so mad I could eat nails! My son had an out of town basketball game, so I didn't find out about this until after 10 tonight. You can bet I'll be at the school first thing tomorrow raising he!!. I live in Oklahoma, and corporal punishment is legal in the schools. I wish I knew what to do, I know I am going to see the super and see what I can do about keeping this man away from my son. I know what I'd like to do, but if I were to paddle him, I'd be in jail. Funny how educators are the only people that have a legal right to hit another person with a wooden object.... Any suggestions?

[Gitty]

Well why can't you call CPS and file abuse charges on him? You said, "So, my husband and I decided to sign a paper saying that he cannot discipline my son." Call CPS Get a worker to meet you at the superintendents office. Then call your local newspaper tell them whats going on. Ask them to send someone for a article to the school. No one has a right to touch your child in anyway. Unless you give them the right. Don't send your son to school at the time school opens. Take your husband, son and if you can the other boy and his parents too. Don't let the principle know about the meeting till you are at the sups. office. Have the Sup. call him. The more people you have with you the better. Remember they are witnesses!

[momfromTN]

There is nothing wrong with corporal punishment, when done properly,(used in serious offenses and as a last resort) but that man is OUT OF LINE, and a bully and on a power trip. Screaming and swinging a wooden paddle or whatever, when you are out of control solves nothing. I think he was singling out your son and was looking for a reason to spank him. Call the school board and CPS. If you deny him permission to spank, he cannot do it, I am guessing. Check your laws.

[TX_Cowgirl]

Did you not know that you can have them file a letter from you stating that you do not wish for your kid to have swats with out you or your spouse being present? At the first of every year I got to where i wrote them a letter and kept a copy for myself and had them put it in the boys files...Stating that I or my husband had to be present and that they were not to do anything until we were there?
Then if they do you can press charges on them. But like i told my sons just because i did that didnt mean they would never get swats because if they called me and i thought that my sons were in the wrong i would let them swat them.. I know that seems harsh but I have seen first hand how if a teacher doesnt like a child for some odd reason it can go bad...Been there done that and am so glad my two are nearly outta school.............

[zitra]

Where I live a teacher can not put his hands on a child to punish him, period..If I found out this happened to my son..I would phone, CPS, police, the superintedant of schools, and anyone else I could think of to get this person out of the school..Here it is against the law to corporally punish a student, so we don't have to sign papers or anything, and I think since it is illegal thye should jail the offender...
A principal here punched a teenage student in the face. He was arrested (only served a few days), and fired.

[justinenycole26]

HE!! NO!!!! You need to call the police and file charges! Like now! I don't give a DAMN what the state of Oklahoma says, that is your son. That man does not need to be in any position involving children.

[lameduch27]

I'm always amazed when I see a situation like this. The schools were the first ones to teach children that any kind of physical punishment was not tolerable,,,and that they could call 911, if they're parent's 'hit' them, and claim child abuse. I have friends who now have out of control children due to this teaching,,,one in particular who used to have the police called on her by her young daughter for swats on the butt. And now that the school systems have embedded this in children's heads, they want to swat these children when THEY deem it necessary,,,and not just a swat to the butt,,,which is how I was disciplined when I was out of control as a child,,,but they want to use a LARGE PIECE OF WOOD to hit the kids with. Just burns my ass that your child got hit, by an adult and basically a stranger. I have swatted my kids a few times when they were younger(now they're too big,,,lol),,,WITH MY HAND! I didn't abuse them, and they're not scarred for life from it,,as I'm not from my spankings as a child. I think that any school system should be punished for allowing the swatting of a child. And that man REALLY needs to be punished. How DARE he hit your child!! I'd be on him like 'white on rice'!!!

[cinnamonch]

Sheri where in OK are you?

Im in Tulsa and they dont allow swatting in the school districts in this area.

I would call the school board asap and talk to someone and if that doesnt help, contact Sandy Garretts office

[MamaFairal]

how old is your son??

NOBODY has the right to lay hands on anyone else...PERIOD!

[Angelseyes28]

Here in MS if you sign the paper stating that your child cannot receive corporal punishment and they paddle your child anyhow you can not only take legal action against the person that did the paddling but also against the school as a whole.
I have always signed the paper each year since my daughter started school. NO ONE will ever lay a hand on my children without paying dire consequences...I might end up in jail but not without sending someone to the hospital first:mad: :mad:

[cch]

Atteend a school board meeting &/or PTA meeting & make sure everyone knows what he's doing! There may be a lot of parents who don't know & should! If enough people are unhappy someone else can fill his position.

[schsa]

You need to call the school board and you also need to start talking to other parents. If this is happening to your child, imagine how other parents would feel if it was happening to their child. And if the principal is that out of control, someone should be breathing down his neck. Threaten a law suit. I know your son is playing basketball but you should also consider pulling him out and changing schools. If your son is the school whipping boy, he needs to be protected.

What are his teachers saying about all of this? What about his coach? There have to be other adults that are observing this behavior and are not approving.

Make a noise and get others involved.

[wyozozo]

When I confronted him, and advised him that my son had done nothing wrong, he became defensive, started citing the bully laws and said he just wanted to get them ready.

Perhaps someone should teach the Principal the "bully" laws!!

Here is the link to the Oklahoma Bully Law:
http://www.bullypolice.org/ok_law.html

http://www.sde.state.ok.us/home/home01_test.html?http://sde.state.ok.us/law/!

Section 808. Ordinary Force for Discipline of Children Permitted.

Provided, however, that nothing contained in this act shall prohibit any parent, teacher or other person from using ordinary force as a means of discipline, including but not limited to spanking, switching or paddling. (21-844)

Determining reasonableness of punishment includes student's age, sex, physical and mental condition, nature and motive of offense, whether force was degrading, and likelihood of permanent harm upon student. Holman v. Wheeler, 677 P.2d 645 (Okla. 1983)

Section 823.9. Child Beating.

A. Any parent or other person who shall willfully or maliciously engage in child abuse shall, upon conviction, be guilty of a felony punishable by imprisonment in the State Penitentiary not exceeding life imprisonment, or by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one (1) year, or by a fine of not less than Five Hundred Dollars ($500.00) nor more than Five Thousand Dollars ($5,000.00), or both such fine and imprisonment. As used in this subsection, "child abuse" means the willful or malicious abuse, as defined by paragraph 1 of subsection B of Section 7102 of this title, of a child under eighteen (18) years of age by another, or the act of willfully or maliciously injuring, torturing or maiming a child under eighteen (18) years of age by another.

B. Any parent or other person who shall willfully or maliciously engage in enabling child abuse shall, upon conviction, be punished by imprisonment in the State Penitentiary not exceeding life imprisonment, or by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one (1) year, or by a fine of not less than Five Hundred Dollars ($500.00) nor more than Five Thousand Dollars ($5,000.00) or both such fine and imprisonment. As used in this subsection, "enabling child abuse" means the causing, procuring or permitting of a willful or malicious act of child abuse, as defined by paragraph 1 of subsection B of Section 7102 of this title, of a child under eighteen (18) years of age by another. As used in this subsection, "permit" means to authorize or allow for the care of a child by an individual when the person authorizing or allowing such care knows or reasonably should know that the child will be placed at risk of abuse as proscribed by this subsection.


HB1151 An Act relating to schools; amending 70 O.S. 2001, Sections 6-185 and 6-194, which relate to teacher preparation and professional development; requiring competencies and professional development on certain classroom management and student discipline skills; providing an effective date; and declaring an emergency. (Senate Amended, Title Restored, Emergency)

Effective Date: 07/01/2003 Emergency: Yes
Principal Authors: Smith, Dale (H); Laster, Charles (S)
Status: Governor Action - Signed Status Date: 05/28/2003

[nosamiam]

Did you go to the school today???

[hotwheelstx]

I can't believe anyone did that!!!!! I'm shocked. I would file assault charges on the principal. If you didn't agree to your son being swatted that's going again your wishes and I would think be against the law.

I would certainly look into it further. I thought this kind of behavior went out years ago in the schools.

That really chaps me...... :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

[momfromTN]

In private schools they still spank. They do in my son's school. ONLY if you sign the paper and ONLY the principal or vice Principal and there HAS to be a witness of the opposite sex. But, again, if I were the OP I would be livid. There are ways to do things and ways NOT to do things. The man in question sounds like he is on a power trip and looking for a patsy.

[SheriAndy]

I am astounded by your replies! Thank you for validating my anger! This morning I went straight to the school. The super and the principal were both 'out'. I spoke with the secretery (she is a sweetheart) and she said she had been out yesterday. I told her what had happened, she gave me a copy of the paper I had given the school directing them NOT to swat my son, and was so mad! I left a message for the super to call me as soon as he got in. I no sooner walked into my front door when the principal called. He said he had heard that I was at the school to talk with the super, and just wanted "to apologize, he thought that my son was a 7th grader...." !?! What difference does THAT make????? (My son just turned 12 last month, he is in the 6th grade). I just said that I would not discuss the matter with him, I was looking for the superintend. I hung up and 10 minutes later got a call from the super wanting to talk, I insisted we talk face to face only and returned to the school. I showed him a copy of the paper I had signed and informed him that swats were applied anyway. I also updated him on the entire situation. Really, nothing was accomplished. He said that from now on, he would not allow the principal to punish my son, he would handle his discipline himself, after calling me. Nothing is going to happen to the principal. So, I have the names of the members of the school board and will be on the phone all evening - doing some chatting. If I don't hear something that appeases me, I will take the next step and contact Sandy Garretts office as advised.
I cannot tell you enough how good it feels to know that I am not an alien, that I have the right to be as outraged as I am. Ya'll are just awesome!:)
Cinnamonch, am in a small community right outside of Enid.

[stresseater]

I would also call good ole Brad Edwards with the channel 4 news. He may be interested in this. I also agree that there is a place for corporal punishment in schools, however it is nuts like this that take that choice for schools away. I am also in Oklahoma and our school district sends home a form for the parent to fill out as to whether you will allow them to spank you kid. You had that form and therefor I would think you have a criminal situation here. IMHUO ;)

[shelhop]

And there you have it, folks! The reason I moved back to Michigan from Alabama! I do not find any logic in the idea that it's acceptable for a teacher or principal to use corporal punishment, and yet when we spank our own child, it's considered child abuse.
(Touchy subject for me. My son was paddled his first day of kindergarten for failing to raise his hand. Did NOT set well with me.)

[queenangie]

This is horrible!
Keeping you on our prayers.

Please keep us posted.
Hugs,
Angie

[Sunnymoonx]

i just told DH about what happened and he said you might want to call a lawyer. From what I understand, you signed a paper saying you do not want your child to be swatted and he did it anyhow? You might be able to press charges against this principal if youw ant to go this route.
Good luck

[YYounghouse]

Originally posted by *chelle*
When i was in junior high living in Texas,i got swated
and my mom was pissed,she called the school and then the
cops and they both said it was legal in the state of Texas.
the laws may have changed since then - i hope



It is still legal in Texas to give swats.
Schools can make their own rules against it.
Schools can make rules that restrict things
that are legal elsewhere. They cannot make Legal things
that are illegal elsewhere. Therefore, many schools in
Texas do not allow swatting. But it IS legal.

[cinnamonch]

I would still contact Sandy Garrett's office ASAP. I would write a detailed letter regarding the incident and if you could, see if the other child(ren) parent's have spoken to the principal and see if they would write one too.

Fax that and a copy of your no swatting form and send it to her.

These folks need to be put on notice.

[queenangie]

Here is another thought. Birds like birdseed. They flock where there is birdseed. When birds eat birdseed, they leave little 'presents.' Maybe someone could sprinkle birdseed on top of
someone's car, hood, & trunk! LOL! Just joking, but it gives me a good visual picture of the principal's car.

Another thing, in English class years ago, the way to recall the difference between the principle and principal was that the one in charge of school ended in 'pal'. Does not seem to apply in this case at all!

Keep us posted.

[wubbywa]

Not that I am arguing the issue I believe that it was not right but some parents do not realize what kids put teachers,staff members thru and they have to put up with it. I am not saying your child was bad either but I know that parents out there do not believe there sweet little ones would do anything wrong. One principal makes schools look bad all over that is why we can not disipline (sp) students anymore because they let it get out of hand. Parents get mad because there child gets suspended and then they have to deal with them so mommy calls and complains to the school. PLEASE do not think I am using this case I am not--he was wrong--the principal.

[Linus1223]

Please keep us all updated.

[Taegus]

Eagerly waiting to hear if you talked with the Board Members?!?!?!

[spongebob]

yes please keep us posted, man if that was my child i would be ticked.. i would be the one in jail. i always give my kids the benfit of doubt thinking yes you might of done this but your child done nothing wrong.my son 8 he only been spakin once threaten a thounsand but only once..

my oldest got dention because he for got to wear his id.. so that lead to saturday school did he serve it yes.. did he derserve it no and yes.. yes because they have alot of kid that comes and to the school that don't go their selling drugs so yes he needs to wear his id.no because it could of been a warning..now on my daughter they always threaten her with i am going to call your mom she said go ahead ..

he was wrong and to me i would think how many other kids has he done this to.

[Azriel_LittleHawk]

"There is nothing wrong with corporal punishment, when done properly,(used in serious offenses and as a last resort) but that man is OUT OF LINE, and a bully and on a power trip. Screaming and swinging a wooden paddle or whatever, when you are out of control solves nothing. I think he was singling out your son and was looking for a reason to spank him. Call the school board and CPS. If you deny him permission to spank, he cannot do it, I am guessing. Check your laws."

scary but we agree once again Momfrom TN!!!! be afraid *giggle* be VERY afraid!! *ROTFL*

[momfromTN]

OOH AZ, my old buddy! I WILL turn you into a BUSH fan yet!! LOL! LOL! *cackles as she skips away before a shoe hits her*

[ebgreen74]

wow I had no clue corporal punishment was allowed anywhere anymore these days. I also think that done the right way, it should be allowed in every school. Kids have nothing to fear at school so they run wild, then you can't discipline them at home either because they call cps on you for a spank. Its really getting out of control. NO way should that principal have touched your son without your permission though. That was crazy. I'd be contacting a lawyer for sure.

[debs1967]

plain & simple...Call a lawyer and threaten to sue the school district if he isn't immedately dismissed, If that doesn't work---kick his ass!!!-lol, but i am angry for you.