My Daughter's Friends Call to Talk to Me

[Ladytiger]

I guess it's a good thing. Word is out that "you can talk to J's mom". I have three kids that call here to talk to me because their mom's just don't want to listen to them. These kids have valid questions-and their parents either won't listen, or don't have the time, or as one kid put it, "my mom sets a timer for me to discuss things with her, then after the timer goes off, she is done". How freaking sad!!
But I am wondering, if your son or daughter was talking to someone else-what would your reaction be? I don't want to step on toes here, but these kids only call when they REALLY want someone to listen to them or to guide them in the right direction.

[Unicornmom77]

Well I am guessing if they dont care enough to freakin listen why would they care who they are talking too???? I MEAN OBVIOUSLY THEY ARE VERY PASSIVE PARENTS! But on the other hand they may get upset because now someone eles KNOWS they arent doing thier job!! Not much help am I! LOL

I would definatly keep doing it!!! If I would have had someone to talk to as a teen I might have avoid ALOT of trouble and heartache!!

GOOD LUCK, And I commend you for doing what you are!! GOD BLESS YOU!

[DAVESBABYDOLL]

It's good they feel they can talk to you, alot of kids feel their parents don't listen to them,which can often lead to bad choices.

[Whatamess]

My son tells me everything, I do mean everything. My sons friends even tell me things. All you can do is listen & be there.

[nosamiam]

I have a best friend that my daughter will talk to about stuff she doesn't want to talk about with me. My friend tells me everything. I think it's great that they have an adult to talk to.

[BigLyd1]

I say thank God for people who will lend an ear to kids and their problems, especially when their parents don't want to listen. My DH works with a youth group and will listen to the kids and try to guide them as much as possible.

[GeThang]

My color guard girls talk to me about things they can't talk about with their parents. Even if they have had an argument with their parents and just want to vent it out, I'll listen to them. I think my age plays a huge role in it, so that is to their advantage.

It is cool, they are respecting me, listening to me, and aren't afraid to tell me "anything." LOL. Sometimes I have to say, "and you are telling me this because?" They love it when I do that, makes them laugh. :)

[Dolly<3]

Ugh...poor kids. :( I think they would be really mad if they knew. Some of them would. It's like telling them they are a bad parent in a way and ALL parents get offended by that. I wouldn't stop listening to them though. Just deal with that if it ever comes up. :)

The woman with the timer probably thinks she's doing something good. It sounds like something a psychologist would suggest to get your kids to talk to you. Like ok you only have to talk to me until this timer runs out and then you can leave. Then the kid loosens up and the mom doesn't know she still wants to talk and leaves. Or maybe she's just a wicked witch. :rolleyes:

[schsa]

I deal with kids who are depressed and might be considering suicide. I can tell you that if you can talk to your kids about anything, you are the exception. So many kids are afraid that their parents won't understand or are afraid to tell them. They get this from the reactions that their parents have to other people and their problems.

So they talk to me. They are afraid that they aren't good enough, that they will let their parents down. That they are a disappointment because they aren't perfect. It's really sad that a child has to end up cutting themselves or taking an overdose of medicine because they cannot talk to their parents.

[MsPiggy44]

Lady keep talking to them.

[christianw27]

My son is only 10 but all his friends think I'm the "cool mom". I'm very approachable I guess, easy to talk to, sometimes its a little overwhelming though!;)

[Ladytiger]

Originally posted by *Amanda*
Ugh...poor kids. :( I think they would be really mad if they knew. Some of them would. It's like telling them they are a bad parent in a way and ALL parents get offended by that. I wouldn't stop listening to them though. Just deal with that if it ever comes up. :)

The woman with the timer probably thinks she's doing something good. It sounds like something a psychologist would suggest to get your kids to talk to you. Like ok you only have to talk to me until this timer runs out and then you can leave. Then the kid loosens up and the mom doesn't know she still wants to talk and leaves. Or maybe she's just a wicked witch. :rolleyes:

Oh no! The mom is just "too busy", so she sets the timer and then he has to talk really fast. Then "welp, the time is up"..and she's gone to run around or whatever she does.

Another mother took her kid to a tour of a mental ward, and threatens her with that, and says that the kid was her biggest mistake.

The thing is that I see these parents when DD has something at school-it will take every ounce of control not to tell them off. These are "good kids" too, they get good grades and are polite. I know, I don't know what they are like at home, but I am a good judge of character and these kids aren't bad. Their parents are just too caught up in their "stuff". Sad.

[Dolly<3]

I had a feeling it was something like that. :(

Isn't the mental ward thing psychological abuse?

I am glad they have someone to talk to. I'm sure they aren't as nice when they are at home, but that's understandable. I'm sure they would be if their parents would listen - if there's not too much resentment already. *sigh* :mad: