Why Me? Why Us? Why Now? *Long*

[Tasha405]

I don't even know where to start but I need to get things off my chest. I am so stressed right now. This whole year has been crazy for us. Here's a list of some of things we have been through since the beginning of this year..

Hubby lost his job
a week later we find out we are gonna have baby #3 (we are happy but remeber he just lost his job)
Hubby had a death in the family
Our car was stolen (but we found it later, thank God!)
Hubby's Grandpa is real sick and in and out of the hospital (he's in there now, tomorrow will make 2 months)
My Grandma was sick
We had to file Bankruptcy
Still can't afford the bills so we have to cut out all the little extras
I've had complications with the pregnancy
The kids were sick off and on for about 2 months
Still can't afford the bills and they keep raising the bankruptcy payment
My cousin tried to kill himself
They have raised the bankruptcy payment again. Its went from $240.00 to $419.00 and we still have another company fighting wanting more money. So the payment will raise yet again.

This is all really getting to me. We've had other things going on as well but I just can't think of everything. I'd probably have to make 4 or 5 seperate threads for it all. We went and talked to our lawyer yesterday about the payment being so high. We simply can't afford it. Yes its a lot cheaper than it all was before but we can't afford it with our only income being hubby's unemployment. We are trying to raise 2 kids on it now with one on the way. There is just no way. So the lawyer tells us that there is nothing he can do, we need to give up some of our belongings to make the payment lower. Ok, so we can give up our car, living room furniture, tv, dvd player, hubby's gun and my computer. If we give up everything but the car, we save close to $80. Thats it. We will be sitting on the floor just to save $80 a month and still wouldn't be able to afford the payment. We have no other way to get any other furniture and no family around to help us. We can give up the car and keep the furniture but then we won't have any income. If we don't have a car hubby can't get to school and so the unemployment would be cut out. I just don't know what we are gonna do. Its like we are screwed any way we go. Here we have 2 kids, a baby due in 8 weeks and we are losing everything we have. I feel like I'm being punished for something but I don't know what I've done wrong. Just when I try to have something in life, it gets taken away. My mom has helped when she could but there is only so much she can do. I don't expect anyone to pay our bills, I would never even ask someone to do that. I just couldn't. I can't get a job because I wouldn't be able to afford daycare for 3 kids and I don't even know how to drive. I just don't know what we are gonna do.

I'm sorry to just keep going on and on. I'm just so aggrevated. I finally lost it last night and cried for hours.

Thanks for reading. No need to reply. I just needed to vent.

[jaimethepooh]

((tasha))
it may seem hade to belive now but things will get better.
hang in there.

[tiffany21]

oh sweetie things will get better. have you tried to appy for county assistance they might be able to help you. hugs

[socks1211]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tasha405}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}

[Willow]

(((((Tasha405)))))

[jcw]

I am so sorry for all your troubles. Hang in there. Things will work out.

[Lisa03]

{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

[aimefisher]

Have you tried WIC and FOODSTAMPS? Plus if you are still paying on your furniture give it up for now and go to the thrift shops with what you were paying for the furniture for a month and get some stuff you won't have to make payments on.

[suzziq03]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tasha405}}}}}}}}}}}} I really wish I could do something to help you out. :( I do hope things look up for you soon, prayers headding your way.

[1busymomma]

(((((((((((tasha)))))))))))))))

I've been there, it's not easy at the time but hang in there! It will get better. When a door slams shut, a window opens (even if it is just a crack)

Your in my thoughts and prayers today.

[Iluvbears]

Awwwee, I'm sorry you are going through a rough time. Honestly things do get better. You may have a long road to travel before things look up. You got to keep trying, if you don't try to get out of the mess you are in you'll remain in the situation. I know you are trying, just don't give up.

Are there any jobs in your area? If you DH can apply for jobs (even jobs he wouldn't normally apply for) like fast food, resturants, news paper, construction, lawn care or anything. If he applies for a job, just don't fill out the application, call the place a couple days later. So, they know you really want to work. I don't know if working is an option for your DH seeing he's going to school.

To get extra cash, you can pawn things, pick up cans, copper and thing that a recycling center will give you cash for, & sell things.

I know how it is to be in your situation, I lost everything for the exception of the clothes on my back. It's hard, life is not one bit fair most of the time. You gotta do what you gotta do inorder to survive in this cruel world.

Anyway, Hopefully things will start to loo up for you soon. {{{Hugs to you}}}

[Tasha405]

Thanks everyone. I just needed to talk to someone, I have no one here that I can talk to. Our family lives in WV, so they are 500 miles away. Yeah I've signed up for WIC and Foodstamps and they help SO MUCH! I don't know what we would do without them but it doesn't feed us all month. I still end up having to buy food for a week or so. I do need to call and report that my bankruptcy payment has raised though, that might help us get more. Hubby has been trying to get jobs. He also has applications filled out with the unemployment office as well. He's only allowed to make like $30 a week while on his unemployment, if he makes more than that they take it out of his unemployment check. He's going to school though to try and get certified in welding. He was a welder for 5 yrs but he had never gotten certified. His unemployment check is more than what he would bring home from McDonalds or something so we are better off just drawing it for now.

I just sat down and figured out our bills and we are $320 over budget. Thats with figuring gas money for him to go to school and one weeks worth of food, our monthly bills like electric, water and so on. Also with the bankruptcy at 419 and our house payment, lot rent and insurance on everything.

The woman at the lawyers office gave us an itemized list of all of the bills and how much goes where for our bankruptcy. If we gave up our living room furniture it will save us $15 a month, as of right now. They are the ones fighting it so I'm sure it will go up more. I don't know of any thrift stores around here that I could get me a couch from. I don't even have the money to get something else anyway.

Thanks for all the replies. Please say a prayer for us or something. Everyone keeps telling me to hang in there but its getting so hard to do. I asked my hubby yesterday what I was supposed to hold on to since we are losing everything that we have. :(

I'm sorry for putting all my personal info out here like this. I know I probably shouldn't but I had to get this off my chest. {{{Everyone}}}

[robinA]

((((((Tasha))))))

[mrs.john]

{{{Tasha}}}

[Quaker_Parrots]

Shoppers guide, and Swap shop (1240 wenk @ 12 noon I believe) is a good place to start for furniture. Let me guess, you got your furniture at Moser & Jones? he is a pain in the rear.
If you need help with food, I do know they give out commodities every so often there. also, they have Helping Hand, you might call them, I think they even have clothes and furniture.
If you get in a bind, there usta be a church on Mary Jane in your town that helps people out with food. Too bad your hubby doesn't drive a truck, I could see if my BIL needed any help. has he thought about putting in an app at Sara Lee (aka Jimmy Dean) in Newburn? from what I understand, the money isn't too bad there.
My hubby also suggested going to the churches, if you have too, most of them there still help out, when someone is in need, whether you attend the church or not.

There aren't a lot of thrift stores, in Tasha's area, so that wouldn't help much, she lives in a very small area.

I don't know of anyone who babysits there anymore, so I couldn't help you there, plus it would be another 3-4 months before you could start anyway, so..... Maybe if you could hold out for that long, you could make friends with someone that you could carpool with? (them driving of course)
I do know, if you are without vehicle, you can get a ride to Dr appointments and such, you would have to set it up through, either the health department or Human serices, can't remember which.

I will try to call my brother tonight, and se what he can let me know about other services down there, and he was in need at one time, and knows about everything you can get help in that area through

((((((((((((((((Tasha)))))))))))))))))))
Just edited to add, check this link out here: http://forums.bigbigsavings.com/showthread.php3?threadid=324917&perpage=15&pagenumber=1

to maybe find some baby freebies you can use

[schsa]

Tasha, how much longer does your husband need to be in school? And is he guarenteed a job when he finishes? Or does he have some good prospects when he finishes?

If the odds are in your favor that when he finishes school that he will have a job, I might try to hold out for as long as I can. If he only has a few months more I would do whatever I could to hold off the higher payment knowing that you will be in a better financial situation very shortly.

As far as food goes, check out the local food bank. Call the local churches and find out if they know of a food bank and what you have to do to qualify for food. That's where I would start. With a weeks worth of food, you will have that much more money to live on.

Finally, don't give up. Even when things look their worst something will happen. Just hang in as long as you can.

[Quaker_Parrots]

HUbby said to have your hubby go to World Color Press,(Dyersburg) if he can weld, he can probably get a job there, he had a friend that could weld, and hubby said he believes the boy wasn't certified

[Tasha405]

Thanks everyone! {{{Hugs}}}

taybai, I'll have him check out Sara Lee & World Color. He did go put in an application at Ermco in Dyersburg not long ago too.

Thanks for all the links and everything. I really appreciate all the help!

[Quaker_Parrots]

not a prob, if I find out anything else from my bro, I will let you know

[ahippiechic]

{{{HUGZ}}}

[MsLynn]

have you tried to convert you bankruptcy from chapter 13 to chapter 7, both will remain on your credit for the same amount of time and it won't hurt it anymore?

[squirt]

I feel for you, do the churches have rummage sales, sometimes you can find clothing and furniture cheap there.

I know how tough it is, I think most of us have been there at one time or other in our lives, I know it doesn't help you feel better, but we are here for you.
Our thoughts are with you.


TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, TREASURE IT

[mom4angels]

Tasha Have you tried to see if you have a local Salvation Army They would maybe help with the furniture and maybe some of your utility bills. I would also try your local churches they maybe able to help with food for the weeks that you need it. I hope that everything works out for your family.

[Quaker_Parrots]

Originally posted by mom4angels
Tasha Have you tried to see if you have a local Salvation Army They would maybe help with the furniture and maybe some of your utility bills. I would also try your local churches they maybe able to help with food for the weeks that you need it. I hope that everything works out for your family.

Not a Salvation Army in her area, lol, I usta live there, and believe me, not much of anything there, they are lucky to have anything to get help

[Sarahsmom]

I needed some extra money. I looked at the tag sales in the paper and found ones with kids clothing. I spent about $10 and some really nice baby clothing and turned around and sold them on e-bay for alittle over $50. You could make this a family project. If your husband isn't working he can help with the hunt of neat things to sell. Have him help post items. Have the kids help pack them up and take them to the postoffice. Make it fun instead of a chore. No one will know you made the extra money.(unemployment or WIc) This is the perfect time to find great stuff at tag sales. Craft books sell great and they are usually low cost at garage sales.
There is always ways to make extra money.

[kelblend]

{{{Tasha}}}

[Jojaby]

{{{{HUGS}}}}

[Lizerella]

just wanted to offer some hugs...I'm not one to give the life gets better speeches at the moment...but they will look up...go kick something:)

[mimi37]

{{{{tasha}}}}

[jonette5]

All my hug, prayers and good vibes!

[Kyla Kym]

{{{{{{{Tasha))))))) I hope things start looking up for you soon. I wish I could offer to help you, but looks like I'm going to be pushed into the same boat myself. My SIL stopped paying for her home that my husband co-signed for, and now they seem to expect us to pay the 30 thousand dollars owed on her home. So because of this, we have worked our butts off for 20 years to have good credit, and it's just going to go up in a ball of smoke because of someone else. Sorry to vent in your thread, but just wanted to let you know that your not alone and it can happen to anyone. {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}} Maybe by the time we have to start going through this, your situation will be improving and you can prepare me for whats to come.

[~Roxy~]

{{{{tasha}}}}

[bcjjhh]

not sure if this will help or not, but there is a site that helps some people.
www.modestneeds.org

[Tasha405]

Thanks for all the hugs yall. {{{Everyone}}}

Kyla Kym, I hope you never have to go through this. :(

bcjjhh, thanks for the link, I'll check them out.

We are checking out all of our options right now. I just hope we can work something out.

[feliciac]

(((((((((((((tasha)))))))))))

My only suggestion would be to change bankruptcy chapters. You are making payments on a bankruptcy, I would assume that means you filed chapter 13. You can switch to a chapter 7 as long as the 13 is not finished yet. It might not be the best thing in the world, but they both stay on your credit for the same amount of time and you usually only have to pay on secured debt on a chapter 7.

[kgerstorff]

Tasha, send me your email..i want to do something for you!

[Tasha405]

Originally posted by kgerstorff
Tasha, send me your email..i want to do something for you! I pm'd you.

Thanks everyone. {{{Hugs}}}

[sweetlady28]

I wished you lived closer, I have a couch and chair you could have, it is old but it's sittable.
I have been in your shoes all year long sweetie, wish I could do something but I am just getting a bit back on my feet myself, it has been a very hard year for alot of people, Please keep your chin up and pray, I will keep you in my thoughts, hugs.

[Tasha405]

Thanks sweetlady. {{{Hugs}}}

[dustedwing]

(((((((Tasha))))))))

[KitaKat]

(((Tasha)))

Hope everything gets better soon... I really do!

[Lafwthme2]

Hi Tasha- God bless you. I sure hope things will get better for you and your family soon. In case this might help you stretch your food budget more... there's a group on yahoo called 4on4 that teaches you how to organize yourself in the kitchen (and other areas) so that you can feed your family for a few dollars a day (lots of good food). Even if you don't want to follow the exact menus, etc, you will learn SO MUCH from this group on ways to save money and cook things from scratch for next to nothing. I have learned a lot from it already and so have my friends. They give a lot of good recipes too. Anyway... just thought I'd share... they give ideas on other ways to save money also, not just in the kitchen. If you want to check it out just go to www.yahoogroups.com (http://www.yahoogroups.com) and do a search for 4on4.

Take care and best wishes!
hugs... Laf

[Tasha405]

Thanks everyone. {{{Hugs}}}

Lafwthme2, thanks for the link, I'll check them out. I could use all the help I can get.

[GeThang]

(((Tasha))) Hang in there hun. It will all work out. When you're down, there is nowhere to go but up. even if it seems there is no light at the end of the road, when there is darkeness, there is light. Many hugs to you.

[bcjjhh]

hope taht you are feeling better today!

[Tasha405]

Thanks yall. I'm trying to hang in there and take it one day at a time. {{{Hugs}}}

[kgerstorff]

Hey Tasha
was wondering how things was going? You get your package yet? Keep in touch.

[Tasha405]

Originally posted by kgerstorff
Hey Tasha
was wondering how things was going? You get your package yet? Keep in touch. I got it in the mail today!! Thank you so much! :D That was so sweet of you. The kids were in 7th heaven! lol {{{Hugs}}}