Why do people let...............

[hotwheelstx]

their children stare at people w/disabilities????

I have had this all my life and it's finally starting to get to me. I was in Walmart today and a little boy "found" me and followed me around the store for 2 hours just staring. No parent or caregiver to be found.

PLEASE DON'T GET ME WRONG...........I don't mind if any child comes up and asks me why I'm different, why I can't walk, why are my feet smaller for an adult?

I get stares/questions from adults as well.

How do you take a bath?

Who gets you dressed?

How do you eat?

Do you sleep in your chair?

Do you have little furniture in your house?

How do you sleep in a "real bed"

Who stays home w/you?

How do you have "wild thing"?

Who would want to marry someone w/disability?

Do you live in a group home?

How do you go to the bathroom?

Do "they" know where you are??? Who are they? I'm 40 years old and haven't had to answer that kind of ???? since I moved out of my mom's home.

You know you should really park in handicapped parking.......it would be easier on you don't you think??? Yes, it would but it's full. What else can I do?

Yes, adults weekly ask me these kinds of questions. I answer as politly as I can w/out coming/sounding rude.

Children on the other hand (jmo) aren't exposed to these things daily.

Whatever happened to everyone is different. It doesn't hurt to ask. I will tell you that I've asked some people about their disabilities.

Most are grateful that I asked instead of staring them out of the store. It's embarrassing, intimidating, harrassing to say the least. Especially if you have an adult doing it to you.

I guess it's just another day in the life of hotwheels................:confused: :eek: :confused: :eek: :confused:

This certainly isn't the first time and it won't be the last, either. :(

[AllKnowingFool]

(((((Mel))))

People don't stare at Super Mom while I am around. Appearently I am scary. :eek: Then again. My step-grandmother says that people stare at all disabled people. But not like they do at Mom. Ah well. People, as a whole, I have found, are stupid. A person is smart.

[Kyla Kym]

I take back what I said. I just seen the picture you posted. That is beyond tacky.

[Kyla Kym]

But on a serious note (((((hotwheelstx))))), do you ever try smiling at the children real big? My cousin use to do that before she died. She never let her condition get in the way of her wonderful personality. But she was one in a million. ;) I remember the first time I got to see her after they had to remove both of her legs. She was home with the fake ones and was making a huge joke out of it to me about how she felt wearing them. She made sure no one around her felt intimidated by her. Before she passed away she was blind, had both legs removed, a finger. She had kidney transplant I think it was. She had to be hooked up to a machine for that transplant.....but she always was smiling and joking. She made sure no one ever felt the need to pity her or stare at her like that. Not that you do or anything like that. But I'm just thinking you might try a huge warm friendly smile at the children, just to see what will happen. :)

[Kyla Kym]

.

[hotwheelstx]

Originally posted by Kyla Kym
But on a serious note (((((hotwheelstx))))), do you ever try smiling at the children real big? My cousin use to do that before she died. She never let her condition get in the way of her wonderful personality. But she was one in a million. ;) I remember the first time I got to see her after they had to remove both of her legs. She was home with the fake ones and was making a huge joke out of it to me about how she felt wearing them. She made sure no one around her felt intimidated by her. Before she passed away she was blind, had both legs removed, a finger. She had kidney transplant I think it was. She had to be hooked up to a machine for that transplant.....but she always was smiling and joking. She made sure no one ever felt the need to pity her or stare at her like that. Not that you do or anything like that. But I'm just thinking you might try a huge warm friendly smile at the children, just to see what will happen. :)


Yes, but what good is that???? They think we're ALIENS. I understand not knowing or understanding but I don't believe that they should stare. I've even approached some children........w/parents permission still THE PARENTS ARE STARING. What does that teach a child???

I don't see what smiling saying hi, waving has to do w/anything. I've tried it all. It doesn't work most of the time.

I am not a freak of nature, don't look out of ordinary except for sitting, i wear clothes, have nice manicures, I can speak. This also comes along the lines of waiters/waitresses asking Aggie what I want to eat...............Like I can't speak for myself.

All I'm really saying is you can approach people "like us". We don't bite, run off, scream, yell or IGNORE YOU AND STARE OUT OF THE CORNER OF OUR EYES AT YOU.

[schsa]

I suppose most of us are guilty of staring at one time or another. It's not to be mean but more that people have to understand. They see you as someone without the ability to walk and they just don't understand your life. Your difference is more visible than most people.

As an adult I realize that people are different but as a child I think that I would have asked all those questions just because I would want to understand the difference. It's not a matter of being rude as much as it is to comprehend the difference. I suppose I would be more curious about a blind person or someone who couldn't hear than someone in a wheel chair. Again, it's not because I want to be rude but to attempt to comprehend how they live in a world that depends so much on sight and sound.

Guilty.

[Wimzik]

I can see where a kid following you around a store for 2 hours would bother you, that would bug me too, but most kids don't stare to be rude, they are just curious.
My kids have been around people in wheelchairs, there was a little boy in their class last year who used a wheelchair, so my kids don't stare or think anything of it, but the other day when we were walking out of a store there was a guy who only had one leg and he was using a special walker, my daughter was staring at him because she had never seen anything like that before, I just whispered to her that it wasn't polite to stare, but I know she wasn't doing it to be rude.

[BigLyd1]

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. I guess as long as they're just curious or concerned, it's not as bad. I'll never forget the time I was in a grocery story and these three adults were pointing their fingers and laughing at somebody with a "disability." I'm a quiet person but I came real close to telling them off.

[Technologist]

Sorry about the nuisance Wheels.... I just got home....

We now return to your thread.....

[ckerr4]

Originally posted by hotwheelstx
Yes, but what good is that???? They think we're ALIENS. I understand not knowing or understanding but I don't believe that they should stare. I've even approached some children........w/parents permission still THE PARENTS ARE STARING. What does that teach a child???

I don't see what smiling saying hi, waving has to do w/anything. I've tried it all. It doesn't work most of the time.

I am not a freak of nature, don't look out of ordinary except for sitting, i wear clothes, have nice manicures, I can speak. This also comes along the lines of waiters/waitresses asking Aggie what I want to eat...............Like I can't speak for myself.

All I'm really saying is you can approach people "like us". We don't bite, run off, scream, yell or IGNORE YOU AND STARE OUT OF THE CORNER OF OUR EYES AT YOU.

Well, while you may have encountered some rude or less than understanding children, I will say that not all children treat people with disabilties this way. I think it is a matter of parental influence and exposure. The last year I taught in public school, I had a little boy in a wheelchair in one of my classes (7th grade). He was mainstreamed, not special ed, so he was in all the kids' classes, and for them, it was normal. He was normal, except that he was in a wheelchair (which was, in fact, normal to him). If he needed help, he asked for it, and got it, otherwise, he acted just like another kid - did the work, had friends, got in trouble sometimes, just like any other kid. I bet that if one fo the kids from one of those classes saw you in a store, they wouldn't stare like that, and certainly wouldn't follow you around; they would know, from the experience of having a friend in a wheelchair, better than to treat someone with a disability like that.

I'm sorry you've had a bad experience with kids and their parents. I've seen kids especially really learn from being around people from disabilities, and eventually make good friends. It must be a combination of factors.

[Willow]

I'm sorry that the boy followed you around the store for two hours. I would be freaking if I didn't know where my child was for two hours. I think it's normal for children to look at someone who is a little different. I think they are just curious. I know that I have looked at people before but I don't continuously stare at them. If we made eye contact I would smile and say hi. I will not sit and stare at someone or follow them around a store but if someone walked by me I might give a quick glance. I think it's hard not to. I also teach my kids that it's not polite to stare or point. There is a guy that lives in our building who is in a wheel chair so I think they are used to seeing it so it doesn't even phase them anymore. I can understand your frustration with it though. ((((hugs))))

[ntgsmommy]

Hotwheels, I know what you mean--my son is 10 and I too have had the "stares" "whispers" and tag-alongs....I have actually got into arguments with the kid's mother because the kid was actually stooping down to stare at my kid in his face. The mom was 3 ailes over she didn't see what the kid was doing, so my mom stared at her like she was doing to my kid. The parent of the little girl didn't like that. It's ok for them to stare at us, but when we stare back or say something we're made out to be the bad ones....you forgot a couple of questions I get:
1. Can he talk---um--no
2.What's that thing on his wheelchair--his communication device
3 what's that for? So he can talk.
4 Can he walk-no that's what he is in the chair for
5. What's wrong with him--like they are going to understand it anyway
6. Does he go to school? yes, just like you do
Or, they stare when I feed him. Like they have never seen a child being fed..it is embarasing, and it makes me mad too. I know where you are coming from and what you are saying. If you think it's bad as an adult, it's worse with a kid with a disability...I have to speak for my child, plus he has to listen to it all over and over again. I finally just got to the point to tell the kids to go find their parents and leave us alone. I have said before, and I will continue to say that it is not my job to educate other people's kids on my child's disability, it is their job. They may not have the "exposure" so to say to see people with disabilties, but it doesn't take long if they go to a mall, hospital, nursing home, or simply pick up a book about people with disabilties and start teaching them when they are young that is rude and not nice to stare...I hope your day gets better...

[moe265]

My oldest daughter (16) has dystonia. She cannot speak well and has trouble moving her arms and hands freely. She can do things it just takes her a little while. We get the stares and whispers. She just smiles and goes about her business. I get tired of it but she just takes it in stride. Have never had a tag along yet..

[Iluvbears]

Where was the mother when this child was with you for two hours? It's hard to imagine a child following your for two hours. I'm not saying he didn't, but it's hard to believe.

If you notice everyone stares at everyone. Some people glace while others just eye ball you. No matter if you have a disability or not.

Some children do stare, but never heard of one following someone around.

Just smile at the child/person and continue on your marry way. Don't let it eat you up.

[Kelsey1224]

I'm sorry that people are so rude. Ann Landers (or Dear Abby) always says that the proper response when people ask personal questions is "Why would you be interested in something so personal?" And then leave it at that.

[cch]

My oldest daughter stares at everyone! Family, friends, it doesn't matter, she sits and watches other people non-stop. It's really embarassing when we're in a restaurant and she's staring at the other people eating! I'm constantly saying "Shelby stop staring, Shelby stop staring" until I feel like a broken record. But there was one day that I took her with me to get my nails done several years ago and the lady that does them is in a wheel chair. Of course Shelby sat and stared at her until I noticed and I politely told her not to stare that it's rude and she wouldn't want someone to stare at her. Debbie (the nail lady) just kinda chuckled, she said "I'm quite used to it." Didn't make me feel any better about my child being so rude so I asked her if it didn't bother her for people to stare. She told me that she knew from the second she was being put in the ambulance (she was in an auto accident and that's how she ended up in a wheel chair), but anyway she said she knew from the second they were putting her in the ambulance that she was going to be "handicapped". She said she was already telling the ambulance crew that it was going to be ok, she could style hair from a wheel chair, she would be fine. She said that when children stare at her she'll ask them something like "Would you like to know why I can't walk?" or "Is there something you'd like to know about my special chair?" I told her she's an amazing person to be so strong! Someone being in a wheel chair or any other handicap doesn't make them bad or anything like some rude people think, if anything it makes them better and more patient and loving for having to tolerate all the morons in the world that think badly!

[ginna74]

young children do that sometimes and it is up to the parent to tell them it isn't polite to stare. I think it is natural for the children to be curious though. but like I said it is how you handle them that is key. kids would and do ask my dad and he tells them he isn't able to walk all the time like other people and that everyone is different somehow. He doesn't yell and he talks in a calm manner to them and they usually say ok or something like that and walk away. kids are curious and it doesn't mean they are bad.

now following you is another thing.. just means their parents weren't around to help them. if kids followed me for that long I would ask where there parents are or go to the service desk and have them inquire about there parents, would have been worried about them. I don't think I would have gotten upset. That is just me though

[Tasha405]

Originally posted by schsa
I suppose most of us are guilty of staring at one time or another. It's not to be mean but more that people have to understand. They see you as someone without the ability to walk and they just don't understand your life. Your difference is more visible than most people.

As an adult I realize that people are different but as a child I think that I would have asked all those questions just because I would want to understand the difference. It's not a matter of being rude as much as it is to comprehend the difference. I suppose I would be more curious about a blind person or someone who couldn't hear than someone in a wheel chair. Again, it's not because I want to be rude but to attempt to comprehend how they live in a world that depends so much on sight and sound.

Guilty. I agree

[Bohemut]

I get stared at all the time (All Knowing Fool just doesn't notice LOL). I don't mind kids usually, but there have been a few times.... I've had kids who run around my chair or get behind me when I'm trying to back up. I have a power chair and it goes a few inches after I've stopped, so I've hit a couple of kids. Then their parents get mad. Well if you would watch your kid and not let them play chicken with the person in the wheelchair, who btw can't see them behind her, then they wouldn't get hurt. I was followed around by a little boy once. I turned and chased him. Then he would follow me some more, until I chased him again. We had a fun time. I was sad when his parents said it was time to go. LOL.

It's the adults who stare that bother me. Not only am I in a wheelchair, but I'm very fluffy, and have moderate psoriasis (which is also causing me to lose my hair). So people stare. I've gotten used to it. But I am not and never will be used to the snide or nasty comments some people make. I will also never get used to people who act like I'm bothering them by being there, or just by even existing. I guess it just comes down to people being rude and inconsiderate. That's something I just can't understand or tolerate.

I am guilty of looking at other people in wheelchairs. But if I do more than glance or make eye contact and smile, it's because I'm checking out their chair. Man there are some really cool ones out there. :)

[ntgsmommy]

bohemut--yea, I like some people's wheelchair, and have you seen some of the wheelchair vans? I would LOVE to have one--my child is so heavy, I can't even lift him anymore...I desparately need a wheelchair van...no power chair yey, the doctors and "professionals" say he isn't ready for one yet----plllfftt----ok maybe someday..

[Kyla Kym]

Originally posted by hotwheelstx
Yes, but what good is that???? They think we're ALIENS. I understand not knowing or understanding but I don't believe that they should stare. I've even approached some children........w/parents permission still THE PARENTS ARE STARING. What does that teach a child???

I don't see what smiling saying hi, waving has to do w/anything. I've tried it all. It doesn't work most of the time.

I am not a freak of nature, don't look out of ordinary except for sitting, i wear clothes, have nice manicures, I can speak. This also comes along the lines of waiters/waitresses asking Aggie what I want to eat...............Like I can't speak for myself.

All I'm really saying is you can approach people "like us". We don't bite, run off, scream, yell or IGNORE YOU AND STARE OUT OF THE CORNER OF OUR EYES AT YOU.

I can see from this reply to my post, and also from the PM you sent me that you were upset with my reply. So in the future I will just avoid posting on your threads. I don't really know why my post bothered you so much when all I was trying to do was tell you what worked for my cousin. She had such a wonderful warm personality that people were drawn to her. And her personality kept people from noticing anything else. She wasn't a freak either. She was a very beautiful lady inside and out. I wasn't directing anything negative at you, only giving advice. Sorry it wasn't what you wanted to hear.

[mlathroum]

(((((HOTWHEELS))))) Sorry that happened. My older boy also likes to stare. I don't know why. It isn't just with people who have disabilities. I have noticed he is a people watcher. He likes to see what other people are doing and how they handle things. I am not saying that is right. I am also the parent that sits there and keeps saying "stop staring" 5 million times before the smack on the hand gets their attention. My rule with my children is this. They are not allowed to stare at ANYONE!!!!!!! If they have a question about why someone is different or something they have to wait until we are out of earshot and I can sit them down and explain things to them. I have been in stores where a kid has yelled 2 aisles down "Mommy what is wrong with her?" The poor mom turned 5 shades of colors.

[magicwoman19]

{{{{{HOTWHEELS}}}}}}} I know how you are feeling. I have a sister who is handicap, she has Rett Syndrome, and people stare at her all the time and sometimes they even make fun of her. But I dont think children understand, and they can't help it. But it is bad when Adults do it and ask you those questions. It is sad how people treat people with disablities. I always smile at others who are disabled, and am nice and treat them like I treat everyone else. Because I know that it hurts when people are cruel and mean to them. I just want to give you a BIG BIG {{{{{{HUG}}}}}} Lisa

[Hillbilly]

Originally posted by Ravenlost
I always taught my children that staring was rude. PERIOD. Doesn't matter who you're staring at, or for what reason. IT'S RUDE. I started teaching my children that when they were toddlers. But then, I also answered any questions they had to ask and I taught them that everyone is different in one way or another and there's nothing wrong with being different.

Rude behavior from kids I understand. It's their parents not teaching them better manners that I DON'T understand.

Big hugs to ya hotwheels! Yep,I totally agree.{{{{{hotwheels}}}}}

[Sunee]

((((Kyla Kym)))) I didn't see anything wrong with your post. I thought you were just trying to be helpful :).

[ldavern]

I would have called social services or atleast say something to a walmart manager.. They have it all on tape,, remeber the story about the little boy being dropped off in a walmart cart and the stepfather never came back for him.. That poor little boy,,maybe this was the same kind of thing,,I would go back there and check it out... Keep us updated please..

[hotwheelstx]

Sad thing is.......that was a new Walmart in our area and I really liked it. Not sure I'll be going back there for awhile. I'm not sure what happened to that child. He eventually ran off to somewhere. I did alert an associate that there was a child in the store w/out an adult present.....:( :(

I admit I'm guilty of staring also. I have done this to look at a chair, walker that I've never seen before. I will approach the person and ask them ???'s about it. I think that's the least I can do. I'm not staring at THEM.

I did see an interesting walker. It had a seat attached to it. It (the seat) folded out. Boy, I wish I'd had one of those when I still used a walker and braces. Would of been great for long distances or to help carry books, purse.

Nice looking too. Light weight. I did approach that person and they were all to happy to give me information about the walker for future reference.

[MommyG3]

Hotwheelstx, when I was growing up I wanted to walk up to people in wheelchairs and ask them what happened. My mother stopped me more than once and said it would be rude. Hmmm, and it isn't rude to stop, stare, and point. I met a young lady when I went to college and she was in a wheelchair. I stare and finally got the courage to speak to her. We stayed up until 2 a.m. talking. She told me that when I see someone in a wheelchair and want to know, go ask them. They feel alot better when someone comes out and asks rather than staring a hole in them. My mother made a huge mistake and I now have the courage to ask other about their handicaps.

[Iluvbears]

Personally, I believe it's rude to walk up to someone and ask them questions about themselves. I see it as it's none of abyone's buisness. You aren't going to accomplish anything by asking questions..It just shows how judgemental & nosy you are, imo Why make someone feel even more uncomfortable than they may already feel? I don't treat handicapped people any differently than I do a "normal" people. Just because someone's "different" from the rest of society doesn't give anyone any right to ask questions.

It would be like someone walking up to a "normal person" and asking things like, "Why do you walk like a duck? Why is your hair highlighten purple? Why are your teeth so crooked or so white and straight? why are you tall or short? Why do you have a scar on your face? Why's one breast bigger thatn the other? Why are you so thin or fat? Why, why , why why...And on and on and on...No one likes to be reminded of anything that may seem different. Everyone has flaws...If someone walked up and started questioning me about something, I'd walk away & ignore them. Or, I may just start questioning them to see how they feel. Asking questions is worse than staring in my opinion.

[Tasha405]

Originally posted by hotwheelstx
Sad thing is.......that was a new Walmart in our area and I really liked it. Not sure I'll be going back there for awhile. I don't understand. Why are you not going back there because a kid followed you? I'm sure he didn't mean anything bad by it. He has probably never been taught not to follow, stare, point or anything else. I wouldn't let something like this keep me from going to a store. I understand that this is aggravating for you but you need to understand that these are kids you are talking about. My kids will stare and I can tell them 100 times to stop it but they can't help it, they are just curious. I've explained to him that some people are different but that just doesn't keep him from looking or asking me questions.

[waterfowl]

Hugs Hotwheels.........we have a 4 year old that was born without hands and a left foot, and we get quite a few looks our way. There was even one child that said that he must have been bad to be born that way. It sucks big time. With my son, he does not even notice right now with the looks that he gets, and he is very likable so he just goes with the flow, which is great for him. So I follow his lead, and tend to walk away if I can from people who stare, or I stare right back at them. Sounds mean to do that, but it helps me cope with people who stare at my child and not ask questions.

[Tippytail]

Maybe he wasn't staring because he was curious or whatnot,maybe it was because your chair reminded him of a favorite aunt,or a friend that had just moved.What if he couldn't find his parents and he followed you because you have a chair like grandma and he was comfortable with that at a distance since you obviously weren't her.

Sometimes,a person isn't pitied for their handicap,sometimes it's how they themselves present it to others.

I'm partially blind and getting worse so I run into things,not to mention the tripping over things and falling flat on my face.I hear comments all the time about being drunk,the use of a stick and even how my clothes look to how my hair is styled.I have made more friends by telling them "I'm blind in one eye and can't see out of the other" than I have when it first started happening and I had a rotten attitude.

[Sinistas]

Originally posted by waterfowl
There was even one child that said that he must have been bad to be born that way.

That's horrible. No other way to describe it.

[waterfowl]

Originally posted by Sinistas
That's horrible. No other way to describe it.

Yeah it was. I was with my two nieces at the time and they are 11 and 12 now, it happen last summer. They got all in this kid's face. They are very protective of their little cousin. I got in between them and tried to explain to the child about my son, so he would not be ignorant forever about such things. I really, really try not to let things like stupid comments bother me or my son. Luckily they rarely happen.

[Donnagg123]

Originally posted by waterfowl
I got in between them and tried to explain to the child about my son, so he would not be ignorant forever about such things.

That right there is the key to the whole thing. If you educate someone about something they are no longer afraid of whatever it is and will not have to make assumptions. We as humans, and especially children, are curious by nature. Everything to them is new and they are learning their way around the world. I am not saying it is right to stare at someone, but education is the key to stopping all the ignorance. My son this past year had a teacher who was handicapped and needed a helper dog to help her to function within the classroom. His name is Trekker. He was educated that the dog was needed to help her and he treated Trekker as such. They were taught not to pet him because that could derail his training and take the focus off of his teacher. Because of this, he is better educated and now when we come upon someone who has a helper dog he looks and then doesn't think about it because he knows that that person needs that dog for a reason. I understand it is not the handicapped persons job to educated everyone in the world, but it is better to educate one and have them spread their knowlege and in return get smiled at than to not educate and get thge stares and points. My son was born with a congenital heart defect and had corrective surgery for it. He knows all about it, because we have educated him on it from the time he was little. He has a scar that goes from the base of his neck to midway to 3/4 down his belly, and it is pretty prominant. When someone sees his scar he gets excited to tell them all about it because it makes him feel special that he is unique and that they want to know more about him. Our scars and differences is what makes us stronger..not weaker. Just be proud of who you are and show people that it is not a "burden" and "something to be ashamed of" to be who you are with whatever "handicap" you have. Show them that you are proud to be who you are and they will no longer feel afraid of you or others. JMO Have a great day all :):):)

[hotwheelstx]

Originally posted by Donnagg123
That right there is the key to the whole thing. If you educate someone about something they are no longer afraid of whatever it is and will not have to make assumptions. We as humans, and especially children, are curious by nature. Everything to them is new and they are learning their way around the world. I am not saying it is right to stare at someone, but education is the key to stopping all the ignorance. My son this past year had a teacher who was handicapped and needed a helper dog to help her to function within the classroom. His name is Trekker. He was educated that the dog was needed to help her and he treated Trekker as such. They were taught not to pet him because that could derail his training and take the focus off of his teacher. Because of this, he is better educated and now when we come upon someone who has a helper dog he looks and then doesn't think about it because he knows that that person needs that dog for a reason. I understand it is not the handicapped persons job to educated everyone in the world, but it is better to educate one and have them spread their knowlege and in return get smiled at than to not educate and get thge stares and points. My son was born with a congenital heart defect and had corrective surgery for it. He knows all about it, because we have educated him on it from the time he was little. He has a scar that goes from the base of his neck to midway to 3/4 down his belly, and it is pretty prominant. When someone sees his scar he gets excited to tell them all about it because it makes him feel special that he is unique and that they want to know more about him. Our scars and differences is what makes us stronger..not weaker. Just be proud of who you are and show people that it is not a "burden" and "something to be ashamed of" to be who you are with whatever "handicap" you have. Show them that you are proud to be who you are and they will no longer feel afraid of you or others. JMO Have a great day all :):):)

Very well said. I've tried to explain to "little one's" that I'm not sick. In simplier terms.........My legs are kind of broken and drs. can't figure out how to fix them. I truly don't mind ???'s from anyone even adults........but let's get real. I don't expect to be asked by an adult about the bathroom, taking a bath, who gets me dressed, who does my hair, nails, hair, where do I sleep.

However, if I child asks they really don't know how things like this are done.

What gets me.........truly if I've made an honest effort to explain to a child how I'm different and the parent/attendant yanks them by the hand and says "don't stare or look at her".....all the while that's what they're doing.

It just bothered me that there was NO ONE W/THIS CHILD AND TO APPROACH HIM WOULD OF BEEN A BAD IDEA at the time. If some adults would teach how we're ALL DIFFERENT IN SOME WAY and expose children I think there would be a better understanding.

[Carlie]

I do not think it's bad for children to question.. they're quite curious. It's better, in my opinion, for them to ask questions, and get the answers from the horses mouth so to speak, rather than stare, and the kids ask the parents and the canned response, they're just different from you and me. It builds up their self esteeme.. to know that they have the courage to stand up to the unknown and ask a stranger why they are the way they are.. unless you have the stuffy attitude it's none of your buisness. it could be devistating to a child. The children are not being bad for asking, they're curious and want to know. But heck, that's just my opinion.

[Iluvbears]

I don't disagree with children asking questions. Children are innocent, in order to learn they ask questions.. It's the adults who I disagree with questioning. I don't know why people can ask total strangers totally random questions without batting an eye. It's like me going up to someone on the street and saying, "Do you prefer silk or cotton underwear? Silk? Ok." As if it's any of my buisness.

That's the point I was trying to make.

[captorquewrench]

i wanted to say thanks for being so gracious when we met about the questions we had, and I'm sorry about what happened with this kid following you.

[cch]

I worked as a waitress when I was 16. One time an older lady looked like she was having a bit of trouble with things at the table so when I set her water down I said something like "I'll set your water right here so you can see it" (I didn't think anything of it, I was raised by my great-grandparents and that's how I talk to them) and everyone at the table busted out laughing. She put her hand on my arm and patted it and said "Oh honey, I can't see it I'm blind" I felt so bad I went to the back crying. Later someone that was with her came to me and said she was born blind and had heard so much stuff like that in her life that it didn't bother her and I shouldn't feel bad, but I couldn't help it I felt horrible! I think some people now just don't even think about what they say or do, a lot of people are too wrapped up in themselves to think about things like staring at someone affecting the other person like it does.

[hotwheelstx]

Originally posted by captorquewrench
i wanted to say thanks for being so gracious when we met about the questions we had, and I'm sorry about what happened with this kid following you.

Laura,

If you stop and think about it NO ONE actually came out and asked me THAT question. I guessed what the question might be. Just so happens I guessed it correctly. (I'm giving it away here, aren't I???) I was among people I felt comfortable with. It's the TOTAL STRANGERS that walk up to me and ask that gets to me.

Actually, I thought it was kind of funny........that's the only thing ya'll could think of to ask me??????LOL ;) ;) ;) ;)

Now, if you could explain to Aggie that this is "normal behavior" for a lot of society. He still is very uncomfortable with it. He considers it an invasion of privacy.......People are curious. Besides ya'll didn't stare or feel "weird" being around me.........at least I don't think you did.

Mel

:rolleyes: ;)

[Kyla Kym]

Originally posted by Sunee
((((Kyla Kym)))) I didn't see anything wrong with your post. I thought you were just trying to be helpful :).
Thanks (((((Sunee)))), your right. I was only trying to help. :) She found my reply offensive she said in a PM to me. That was why I replied like I did. :)

[captorquewrench]

no hotwheels......didnt feel weird at all. I enjoyed it. want to do it again sometime.

[sadie01]

As did I!!! We will get something together soon.. we all have a bit on our plates right now.

[captorquewrench]

i am thinking a poker & dr hook night after our emailk the past couple of days