Calling All Survivors of Teenagehood!

[Ladytiger]

I need to hear from the veteran moms that have raised teenage girls particulary. Also, from the now grown up teenagers, girls again. What I need to know is this: What was the worst arguement that you had, and how are you getting along with your mother/daughter now? Hope this makes sense.
I was looking for some type of supportive book on this issue from people that have lived through it-either side. Sometimes DD can really make me think that no matter what I do, just isn't good enough and that once she gets out on her own, she'll be gone.

Any thoughts? Inspiration? Snippets of sanity? TIA!

[Queensown]

I was a rotten teen too. I lied, alot.

I was never up front with my mom about what I was doing, including things like sneaking out and dating older guys. When she caught me I cussed, screamed, and threatened violence and running away.

When I turned 17 I met the man who I would wind up marrying (Who was 21 at the time, but mature and my parents loved him.) All of a sudden I grew up. My young teens were awful, but I grew up quicker than most kids did. I find many people even my age now (23) are still going through the things I cleared up at age 17.

My mom and I get along great now, and I'm thankful!

[ajksmom]

The worst argument that I would say my mom and I had was when I told her I thought I was pregnant at 17. She at first wasn't supportive but then after it was confirmed she took me shopping.
Queensown- You and I sound alot alike, when I was 16 I dated a 28 year old, actually snuck off with him for a weekend, my mom found out and it wasn't pretty. I did alot of the rebelling teenage stuff like drinking and sneaking out. I was 17 when I met my husband and he was 23, at first she really didn't like the idea but once she met him she totally loved him and we will celebrate our 15th anniv this Sept.
Things with my mom are the best now. She is my best friend and I don't know what I would do without her. Ladytiger, all I can say is hang in there and give you daughter all you love and support, she WILL thank you for it later on.

[bonniejeanne]

My sister and her daughter fought all the time. After her daughter got married and had a daughter of her own, they became the best of friends. They do almost everything together these days.

[unicorn9149]

Dot & I fought all the time. I would tell her she was heading for trouble with the people she hung out with, but as with everything she had to learn her own lessons. We still disagree sometimes but she has straightened up now that she has a son to support.

[NoFoolPrice]

Ladytiger, you know we are both raising young ladies. Most of the time my dot is a doll, but she can turn quicker than sushi. All of a sudden she is raising her voice at me and I can feel her frustration and the hormones racing.

[treasurymae]

ok.. Well i still have a couple of yrs till my dd is a teenager but i remember from the age of 12-16. i seemed to loathe my mother. I was not very nice to her at all. I was always getting suspended from school for fighting. I lied and stole items, smoked, didnt do drugs or drink . If my mother would even ask me a simple question like does my hair look ok. I would tell her no it is the worst looking hair i've ever seen .. She would ask whats wrong whith it and i'd make up something. She'd ask for help to syle her hair like mine and i'd refuse. Just about anything she asked me i would have some rude advice and attitude. At 16 i got married and had my daughter. From then on we've been closer than ever.

You think she would have had it bad with me. When my sister hit her teens she was 5 times worse then me. Always running away. Tried to commit suicide. Hanging out with the wrong crowd, skipping school. quitting school . Having the police bring her home. Having to be put in a facility for run aways. Getting pregnant at 17. Still not growing up. It has taken her almost 3 yrs to grow up. But now her and my mother seem to get along great.

luckily my moms youngest is a boy.. And he is 16 and hasnt caused her any problems. Yet. I hope my boys are the same way. As for my daughter i pray she is differnt than i was.

[Syrinx]

When I was a teenager, my mom and I fought all the time. It didn't help that while I had the wildly fluctuating teenage hormones, she was going through menopause (I joke that my dad needs to be nominated for sainthood for putting up with both of us). Honestly, we didn't start getting along really well until I moved out for good (I got married a month after graduating from college). We get along great now that we don't have to live together.

Most of it was personality conflict, I always felt like she was expecting me to be just like her, and I'm not. We have very different tastes in most things, and tempermentally I'm more like my dad. The problem was that I think I was 21 before my mom acknowledged that we're very different people.

[1tiredmom]

me and nikki(16) get along for the most part but when we get into it-my husband steps in and honestly sends us to our own corners of the house until we both calm down! since we moved out here to mississippi-we don't argue so much-even when we are alone(hubby working out of state)if discussions start turning hot and heavy we just go to our own rooms and then a little later if i am in the living room watching tv she will come out and sit next to me and ask what i'm doing or just come and lay on the sofa with her head on my lap --then we are fine---hubby says we are too much alike --so i guess it does get better -hang in there!