My Farking BIL

[rain_cries]

My BIL beat up my sister. I am so farking mad!! I don't know what to do ~ she won't leave him.... I want to scream!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lilbugger]

Sorry to hear that,but why wont she leave him? I really dont understand why people would put up with that sh!t. (((((rain_cries & sister)))).

[rain_cries]

She is afraid he will get her kids... other stuff going on... can't really get into it - he has it in her head that she is crap and that if she leaves, his family will take the kids from her. There is so much going on that I can't even think straight now.

[lilbugger]

He must really have her brain washed, for her to think that he could get the kids after beating on her.What a man:mad: :rolleyes:
I dont know your sister situation. Just hope everythings works out for her and the kids.

[rain_cries]

Yeah, this emotional abuse has been going on since they got married and it has now gotten to physical. My DH said she and the kids could live with us... I wish she would take us up on it! Thanks for listening. I am just at a loss that something like this is happening.

[WitchyGurl]

Women who are abused are mentally ill and you cannot judge them. Fear will make you do strange things. Do what you can to help her and the kids be safe but don't be surprised when she goes back to him :(

[lisahiser]

I don't know if it will help or not but maybe you should get her to talk to an attorney. most give free advise for the first visit, maybe then she will be able to know and understand her rights and to know that HE or his family CANNOT take the kids from her and if at all possible have her talk to someone who has been in the same position that she is in. Or maybe you can pull somethings up about the laws in your state so that she can read them and see the TRUTH! But I highly reccomend going to a Lawyer..It is sooooo hard to help someone when they can't hear anything but the voice that threatens them. Just make sure that she knows constantly that you are there for her.... and give her some time, I know its hard, but any of us that have been there know. Its hard to leave when you are in total fear, but the day will come. Just keep giving her the support that you have been, she will thank you in the end. ((((((((HUGS)))))))

[MsLynn]

contact the police and tell them what happened, these days in most states the victim doesn't have to press charges, in cases of domestic abuse if there is any sign of it at all the state presses the charges. if he's arrested she may be upset at first, but if he goes to jail she might realize she's better off. just a thought

[schsa]

You might also try to get someone from your local women's shelter to call and talk to her. If she believes that she can get out safely and still have her kids, she might be willing to leave.

She need support from people outside of the family. People who have been in her situation and walked away. Your only other choice is a family intervention with a therapist who can help convince her that she doesn't have to live this way. She thinks that she has no choice and as long as she believes what he says, she will stay until he kills her or one of the kids by beating on them. And even then she may still think that its all her own fault.

[rain_cries]

Thank you all for your support. She is going to start going to therapy next week and I am going to babysit for her. Maybe once she sees the therapist, she will be able to think past what he is saying and doing.

You guys mean the world to me! You just don't know how much I appreciate this outlet! It really helps me to be able to get my head on straight so I can help her.