kaylaandbrittanysmom

I have about had it with my mom.My daughters gave each other hair cuts the other week(they had long curly hair and now have bobs that go right past thier ears).They do look very cute this way.My mom had a fit about it.I took the girls to see her on Thanksgiving and she told the oldest(5 year old) that she was ugly and that she would beat her butt if she did it again(I do not spank them).My grandmother would not even look at them or give them a kiss.My mom had gotten them a gift for helping pick up pecans the week before(they each picked up about 5 lbs),she told them that since they cut thier hair they could not have the gifts.She usually calls every night to tell them she loves them and goodnight,but not anymore.She has called them 2 times since Thanksgiving.She alao always wants me to bring them over on Thursdays,not now.She comes up with excuses that she does not feel good or is too busy to call or see them.They are hurt.The oldest keeps saying Nana doesn't love her anymore.I tell her she does.I do not understand how she can be so cruel to them.It is just hair,it will grow back.


I called her last night and told her that we are going to have one birthday party for the oldest this year(we have always had 2,one for her and one for my husbands mom).When I told her that his mom and his mom's girlfriend would be there she said she would not be coming.She will not be in the same room with his mom because she is gay.I am so tired of this.My DD will turn 6 on Christmas Day and her Nana will not back down.My DD said that if Nana did not come then she does not love her.I refuse to keep having to do 2 parties and keep having to make 2 cakes.I know she will try to throw my DD a secret party.She will ask me to bring them over and let them stay fo a few hours and she will do it then, just to get back at me.My DH and I have decided that we will not let her keep them around her birthday.I am tired of her head games.I want my kids to see her,but not if she is going to keep hurting them.

She never asks about her grandson.She barely looks at him when we are there.She was upset because I had a boy.She would not buy his going home outfit because he was not a girl(she did buy them for my daughters).She is also mad becuse we gave him my dad's name(he is deceased) as his middle name.She claims I had no right to do that.She says that was for my younger brothers to do.I ignored her and did it anyway.She will not use his middle name.She will only use the initial.She also claims she will only get him one or two Christmas present(the girls will get more from her),because he is too young to play with toys.He will be 15 months by then.

Sorry this is so long,but I had to let it out.I just can't take much more from her.

Willow

(((((kaylaandbrittanysmom))))) I'm sorry you're going through this with your mom.

zitra

((((HUGS))))

I am mad at your mom for you!!! Sheesh, it's hair!! Does she think she has some right to ecide what length their hair should be..And with the gifts she promised them for helpign her?? To not give them those is just mean! They did what she asked in order to recieve them, that is all that should matter...She should also NEVER have told your DD that she was ugly..if it were me, and my mom did that, they would have gotten an earful, and we would have left, and I would have told her not to come by until she could be civil..as for the birthdays do what is right for you..My MIL hated my BIL's ex inlaws, but she went to every birthday party/Christmas/Thanksgiving gathering at BIL's home, becuase it would have been rude/inconsiderate/petty to do otherwise

kaylaandbrittanysmom

I did give her an earful and we left.My oldest just told me she does not want to see or talk to her for a long time.

__________________
The goddess is alive and magik is afoot.
Where Goddess Goes, Magik Grows

MamaFairal

Its just hair....wait till they do stupid teenager stuff...geeessshh!

I would distance myself for awhile and go about your life.Sooner or later she'll cave and wanna see everyone right???

__________________
I finally found the one man not like all the rest!

DAVESBABYDOLL

OMG~ that's not even right! And for your grandma not to look at them either..so sad.

I agree with MamaFairal keep a distance.

__________________
From the day we are born, we should all be afraid, but not from dying.

Nanc952

((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
I hate to say this but your mom sounds like my grandma did.
Also your little girls will probably grow up like me and not care for her.
I was never good enough the other cousins were so smart and I could not do what they did. Never mind that they were 6 and 9 years older than me. Of couse they should know things I didn't, they should have.
Don't try to force your kids to go there, my Mom did all happen we all ended up unhappy. It is sad and the kids will be the loser in the long run. But you can't make anyone love you it has to come from the heart.
Just do what makes the kids happy and if she sees that you are not going to cave hopeful she will come around.
Will say a prayer for you all.

__________________
http://forums.bigbigsavings.com/showthread.php3?s=&threadid=309081

momfromTN

Cut her off. Completely. It is a hard thing to do, but all your mother is doing is destroying your kids. Favoring girls over boys, and acting like it is the end of the world because they cut their hair. Not hugging them because of it. What a sick and demented person. In fact, I would cut her and whoever agreed with her off from my life completely. Do not allow this behavior to ruin your kids.

schsa

MomfromTn is right. Your mother is trying to be a controlling piece of a%%. And you are an adult and don't have to take this from her at all. If she wants to act like this, fine. But you don't or ever should cater to her. She has some major emotional problems.

Your children should not be exposed to her and her illness. Make the break and be happy. She doesn't deserve to see her grandchildren if this is the way she is going to behave.

__________________
I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints.

ezmoney163

I personally think you need to tell your mom, these are your children and she has no right to tell you how to raise them. She is supposed to be there to guide you through mother hood, not raise your kids. How ignorant. I personally have alot of issues with my mother, (we have not spoken in years plus she moved and never told me) I find it is just easier on me a nd my children this way. I say put your foot down and tell this woman to mind her business, if she donesn't like it OH WELL. Her loss!!

__________________
Sometimes it is hard to let go of a memory, especially if you remind yourself of it everyday.

Unicornmom773

I think you got some good advice here already I just wanted to say how awfull that has to be!! I ma praying for you and your kids ans well as your Mom and Grandma!! Hang in there hun!

((((((((((((((((((kaylaandbrittanysmom)))))))))))) ))))))