I need to be cloned - Big Big Forums

belle5691 · 02-20-2003, 02:06 AM

Many here know about my problems with husband, and also know that I am still married and living with him. Right now we are in the calm...and have been for several weeks now. Anyway, he got sick on Sunday, and tonight ended up in CCU in a hospital 15 miles from me. He has had 2 heart attacks, and they are ruling out another one, or congestive heart failure, or just simply complications from bronchitis. I was told by nurses and ER people that I do not need to leave town, even for work. Work is not a problem for me---the clincher is---his family. He had a sister who got in some serious trouble with the law. She stole $5,000 from her previous job, knowing she was going to be disabled soon. Because of alot of issues, this is a federal felony charge. She could not get an attorney for several reasons, among those money. One of my part time jobs is I sell prepaid legal service plans. Because of that, she was able to get a fantastic attorney, very well respected in the Kansas City community. This happened back in August. Reckoning day came and she was asked to turn herself in last week or be arrested. So...I drove her 100 miles to turn herself in, be booked, appear in court, and be released on a simple signature bond because of this attorney working for her. She has 4 sisters and 2 brothers and nieces of legal age but all were too busy to take her to the court date, so I sat for 6 hours and did many other things such as finding a bondsman, just in case, which trust me is not easy when you are not full time employed, and over 2 years employment at same place. Anyway, I had agreed to take her to her court date in the morning. AFTER asking other family members to please help out, and everyone in HER family refused. Remember I am the IN LAW....Well, when I took my husband to ER tonight and was admitted to CCU, for 2-3 days or more they said, I asked his family to take over the situation with the sister. Everyone refused, and one even actually called me at the hospital ER to see if I would still take her. When I said no, my responsibility was to my husband and 2 children, she got huffy and said, well, I just hope she has a good friend somewhere cause Im not going to help either I cant...I have to work. I said, I cant do it, I have to be here with Ron, and I contemplated taking her, and asked drs if it would be okay. They told me NO!!! Now I am feeling guilty because this woman will be going to jail for missing her court date. She is disabled...on a walker..can barely breathe without oxygen. But I cannot leave Ron to do this. What do I do now???? It is 12:13 am here, supposed to be on the road with her in barely 6 hours....and I asked her family to find someone and let her know what is going on. And they probably didnt, and I dont have the strength to call her, I just got home at 11:55....Can I run away with my kids and husband and try to make it without anyone around. They arent much help anyway. I need to be cloned to take care of my kids, my husband, and his sister, and also the business appointment I had scheduled for tomorrow night. I know the business appointment will be handled. Thank God for one good friend and business partner. Thanks for listening.

jadegentle · 02-20-2003, 03:06 AM

{{{Belle****** it's not your responsilbility, I'm sorry but your SIL did this knowingly, it is her problem. Sounds to me like you have enough of your own. Maybe she can go to the local police station and turn herself in there and they can keep her there and alert the other district til someone from the other town can do something about it. I don't know, but they may take that in good faith. JMO!!

Juggalette · 02-20-2003, 10:13 AM

{{{{{ belle5691 ********** You can try calling the court house where she is suposse to be and let them know what is going on , or better yet have her call . I was suposse to be in court out of state on time , it was just for a ticket , but I called and told them I was not going to be able to make it , and the lady put it infront of the judge and he gave me a month extension . Hope everything gets better for you quick !

scifiwoman · 02-20-2003, 11:49 AM

maybe if nothing else she can call a taxi to get there. Cheaper than jail time.

Dolly<3 · 02-20-2003, 12:55 PM

Oh hon, that's horrible.

What an awful situation to be in. Do you know anyone that can take her? Family/friends? You've done all that you can do and this is just a messed up situation. Don't feel guilty - you need to be there for your husband and kids.

I agree w/the Taxi idea.

({({({({({Belle)**)**)**)**)

ckerr4 · 02-20-2003, 03:28 PM

I say call the sil and tell her that you can (under no circumstances - make it clear) take her to her court date. Tell her why - it's a matter of life and death- and tell her that she needs to find someone else. This is her responsibility, after all, not yours. Then it will be her job to keep bugging someone until they take her, and if she needs to make arrangements with the court, then she or her lawyer can do it.

((belle))

belle5691 · 02-24-2003, 08:43 PM

Im home---after a week in the hospital. Ron was in Intensive Care and transferred to a hospital in KC...and the situation was touch and go. They did not know if he would live. He underwent heart surgery again on Thursday. In the meantime...I stayed with him until he was out of ICU and a regular room, then left on the day of my sons 13th birthday to spend some time with him, get some clean clothes with him, and a friend treated me to lunch for 1 hour that day. One of the other sisters came at my request to see her brother, then stopped by my parents home on the way back to her house, told them that I was out screwing a man while my husband was in the hospital critically ill, (NOT TRUE---a friend--the ONLY one who bothered to come to the hospital every day to check on Ron and I--even during the surgery--took me to lunch with Rons full knowledge and blessing). Told my parents that I was a filthy housekeeper, that I did not take care of my children right and that that day was the only time she had ever seen my children taken care of was when my mother had them. My mother, much to my shock came to my defense--told the SIL to get out of her home, to never contact me again, and that she was not welcome in their home either. In the meantime---other minor things have happened....day of surgery, had taken kids halfway to my parents rather than keeping them at hospital with me...rushing back to hospital for 8 am surgery and car broke down. Someone stopped and picked me up and took me to front doors of hospital. Made it at 8 05. Our tax person messed up our rapid refund check. Therefore it was never filed yet...and I had to correct that situation. THEN....my husbands truck was repossessed during this week....I feel bad saying this---cause I dont want to be whining poor me...but I really do want a padded rubber room. AND--the new meds---with insurance copays are ONLY $350 a month. Thanks for listening to me whine....
Also--the SIL and court date---amazing when I absolutely refused to do it...and took care of my family.....they had no problem finding someone else to take her.