Thread: I am in shock-what is going on?

Sorry to hear about your troubles. I hope everything works out for you. As for you son...children learn by example.

Edited to add:

The ticket was most likely a minor in possession of tobacco. They give those out regularly in Texas and Oklahoma and the average fine is usually around $175.

Well as you know yourself, smoking is addictive. You cannot just tell someone to stop and magically they will. It is something that is very hard to quit. Nicotine is as powerfully addictive as heroin or cocaine. Imagine telling someone who is doing cocaine "you better stop or I will ground you!". You must realize he is addicted to this drug (becuase that is what it is). He has to want to quit, because if he does not then he will not stop. The best thing you can do at this point is to educate him on the dangers of smoking and do not buy them for him. But again he has to want to stop at this point.

I do not know if you did or not, but just as a shout out to all parents,most parents educate their children on the dangers of drugs, alcohol, and sex but they forget about cigarettes or they are too embarassed because they do it themselves. That is one of the reasons this year both me and a fellow classmate (I am in nursing school) have gone around to all the local elementary schools and educate them on the dangers of tobacco to try and get them before they even start. Most kids are pressure into smoking as young as 10/11/12 (some even younger!). It is important to educate our young people on the dangers of tobacco.

How can you go to the hypnotherapist for both of you? He would have to go himself. Also, how do you know he does not have a fake ID?, most kids around here have one, even my son had one... and maybe they card all people that look young, when I go out to dinner with my son (26) they card him and not me ()... I smoke and so far my 2 kids hate smoking , they have seen me struggle to quit & know how hard it is... Good luck with your son, I hope everything turns out well..

Yes I did educate my kids about the dangers and drawbacks of smoking. I started when they were about 2 years old. But I smoke and so did hubby. He has quit for 5 years now and says he struggles with the urge but has not gone back to it.

Plus hubby and I both when we first caught him stressed how he is more likely to get cancer if he smokes. I have had cancer 3 times and hubby currently has 2 types now. Plus cancer is a prevalent factor since about 1/3 of hubbys relatives havd died from cancer and 1/3 from heart disease.

I would also tell him how I feel chained to the smokes. I want to quit but am addicted. I am no different than an alcoholic or drug abuser except mine are smokes. I hate the way my hair smells, my clothes smell and the house looks dingy all from cigarettes. I also did the math and if I quit I would save about 4K a year. That is not only a car but the insurance and gas. My son wants a car so bad. But not if you smoke. How can you afford it.

He had all this info and still made the choice to smoke. That is why he and I are going to get a hypnotherapist and give that a try. We'll do it together. Quit and be free of our chains.

The guy from JJ Peppers also got a ticket but is saying it is my sons fault.

We go to court June 5 so I'll post what happens to him and to us.

My son is 17 and looks at most 20. I am 45 and look it. He still should have been carded. He has no fake ID because I asked him. Plus the cop did not call me back after viewing the tape. I asked that if my son used a fake ID to call me. He did not. I just got off the phone with the officer and he said the tape showed my son buying smokes and was NOT carded.

Me

In our county, teen agers can be ticketed and fined and put on probation for smoking under the age of 18. Good luck...because once they start, they do continue.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say, your situation has nothing to do with race. People throw up the race card to blame others. It's a way for them not to feel responsible for their own wrong doings, or actions. It's hard for a lot of people to look into the mirror and blame themselves for their own stupidity.

Your son wasn't sold cigarettes cause he's a "white boy and they want him to suffer the ill effects of smoking." The owner/employee of the store isn't responsible for your child smoking. It's your son who is doing he damage to himself. If he didn't buy the cigarettes himself. He could easily have someone else buy them or steal cigarettes from you. I will agree, The boy should have been carded, If indeed he wasn't. The employee should be held responsible for selling cigarettes to a minor.

You caught your son a year ago with cigarettes and you were not surprised? And, You're just now asking him after a year if he's still smoking?

Good luck with the hypnotherapist. Let us know if it works for you.