God I Didnt Know It Would Be So Bad !!

**gwens29** · 01-14-2005, 05:48 AM

MY SISTER WHO PASSED ON THE 5TH LEFT ME TO CLEAN UP HER MESSES

HER APARTMENT IS A MESS IM TALKING NASTY NASTY...THAT IS ALMOST CLEANED NOW...I HAD TO DIG THUR MOUNTAINS OF CLOTHING TO FIND HER CHILDRENS SCHOOL SCHOOLS (SON AGE 16 DD AGE 17) WHICH ARE NON EXISITENT

THEY HAVE NOTHING AND PART OF ME HATES HER FOR NOT SEEING TO THEIR NEEDS...I FOUND 2 PAIRS OF UNDERWEAR FOR HER SON AND 2 PAIRS OF JEANS ...HER DAUGHTERS UNDIES ARE HIDEOUS..AND HER BRAS AS WELL...THEY NEED CLOTHES SO BAD..BUT WE DONT HAVE THE EXTRA MONEY TO GET THEM

WE HAD TO PAY FOR HER FUNERAL EXPENSES AND ARE NOW BROKE

...HER DD WAS SLEEPING ON A FILTHY MATRESS ON THE FLOOR...NO WONDER MY DS WAS SO DEPRESSED AND WANTED TO END IT ALL IF I HAD TO DEAL WITH ALL THAT I WOULDNT LIKE MYSELF EITHER...I LOVE HER AND MISS HER SO ..BUT ITS REALLY PISSES ME OFF THAT SHE DIDNT CARE FOR HER KIDS ENOUGH TO GET THEM CLOTHES AND HBA ITEMS ETC..SHE WAS A DRUGGIE AND WE JUST DIDNT KNOW HOW BAD

NOW WE DO AND WE HAVE TO PICK UP THE PIECES...AND TRY TO HELP HER KIDS WHO ARE REALLY GREAT KIDS HONOR ROLLS FOOTBALL TEAMS , DRAMA NERDS ETC.THEIR DAD IS OF NO HELP HE SOIGNED OVER PARENTAL RIGHTS A FEW YRS BACK TO AVOID CHILD SUPPORT...MY BROTHER WHO IS DISABLED IS GOING TO BE THEIR MAIN PROVIDER WITH HELP FOME ME AND MY OTHER BROTHER...WE ARE DOING OUR BEST BUT WE ARENT FINICIAL ABLE TO HELP LIKE WE WANT .....THANKS FOR READING AND LETTING ME VENT

**Advertisement** · 01-14-2005 05:48 AM

**YankeeMary** · 01-14-2005, 05:52 AM

I am so sorry for all involved. Maybe you could post their sizes and we all can see what we have to help. BBS family is wonderful in times of need. I sure wish you the best and sorry you have so many different emotions to deal with now. I hope you are able to find time to grieve for yourself. I will keep you in my prayers. God Bless and HUGS!!!

**Barbi_Route66** · 01-14-2005, 06:15 AM

((((Gwens))))

Contact churches & civic organizations in your area. They usually collect clothing, household item, food items, etc. for people in need.

Since the father signed over his parental rights to your sister, I would think that the children would qualify for social security death benefits through their mom (at least to the age of 18). You probably have to wait until you have the death certificate to do this. They may also qualify for medicaid & food stamps. It's a pain to go through the process of applying for these programs & waiting for approval but it's definitely worth trying.

My heart goes out to you & your family.

**DonnaWV** · 01-14-2005, 06:20 AM

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending my prayers for you and your family.

Call your local DHHR. They have a program for emergency food and clothing. The kids should get a vocher to get them some clothes, and like someone else said food stamps. Sounds like the kids did well under the conditions they lived in.

Lets us know if we can help.

**gwens29** · 01-14-2005, 06:29 AM

what is dhhr? and she was diabled on ssi so they dont qualify for social security we are going to apply for food stamps and welfare and they will get jobs this summer...its just getting everyhitng started that is the stressing thing i know it will get better...thanks girls

**cookiegirl** · 01-14-2005, 06:30 AM

I am so sorry for you and the children. I too think they will qualify for social security.

What size is your nephew I have an 18 year old son. If they are the same size we can see what we have.
Just let me know

**nosanity05** · 01-14-2005, 07:09 AM

I feel very deeply for what you and your family are going through. We were in the same situation about 10 years ago, when my sis-in-law committed suicide, and we took take temp custody of her 16 year old, and had to settle her affairs.

I have a 17 year old son, who has clothes he's only worn once or twice. LMK what size he wears, and hopefully some of Nick's stuff will fit.

**gwens29** · 01-14-2005, 07:11 AM

here are the clothing sizes for them if anyone wants help it will be appreciated
gwen41539@bellsouth.net
bradley
size 40 X 32 pants
xl shirts
42-44 boxers
Gina
size 11 in pants juniors
size large in junior tops
38 c bras

**NiteQueen** · 01-14-2005, 07:31 AM

So sorry for your loss but i can help i have a couple of kids that size and we have way too many cloths i will have them go thru them tonite when they all get home can u pm me and let me know your addy and i will get them sent to you this weekend........

**schsa** · 01-14-2005, 07:35 AM

They should qualify for SSI because they are basically orphaned dependents. Ask. Also see about fostering them until they can get out on their own. Foster care will provide for them as well. And go to your social services office to see what else you are entitled to. There are probably programs out there that you aren't even aware of to help you during this time.

**justme23** · 01-14-2005, 03:17 PM

Originally Posted by gwens29

what is dhhr? and she was diabled on ssi so they dont qualify for social security we are going to apply for food stamps and welfare and they will get jobs this summer...its just getting everyhitng started that is the stressing thing i know it will get better...thanks girls

In order to GET SS you have to have payed IN to SS at one point in time... or atleast I thought that's how it worked... and if that's the case, then they CAN draw on the same income percentage that she did. My mother was deemed disabled the last couple years of her life (she had terminal cancer and worked until she just couldn't any more) and I got SS benefits until I was 18 after she died... don't take anyones word for it as gospel... fill out the forms and fight hard for it... yall need every extra cent.

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