Thread: Need help with a crying kindergartener! *sobbing*

Hey one more suggestion

why don't you try writing him little notes that the teacher can read to him if he misses you. Include a picture if you want.
The most important thing I have ever repeatedly stressed to my child is "Mommy will ALWAYS come back" I drill this into her head even now that she doesn't need the reassurance.

Up until now your son was home with you? It does take awhile for them to adjust & learn how to deal with other kids - peer relationships, negotiating(sharing), etc with peers. Then throw in the time change - getting there ontime & a new schedule. it's a lot to adjust to.

But...life is about adjustments & IMHO it's better to learn early that life doesnt accomodate you. You must adjust & handle life.

The bully thing is a major concern & really wound a child's self-esteem. Unfortunately for your son, his crying gives the bully more incentive to be mean...but your son does need to express his feelings. IMO it's largely the teacher's responsibility to handle a bully in her classroom. I agree with your scheduling an appt to meet with her. To see how observant she is you might ask her how your son is getting alg w/other kids & see if she volunteers abt the bully. An observant teacher would bring this up to the parent, IMO.

This is an opportunity to instill self-esteem in your child that can withstand & stand up to bullies. Sadly, there may be others in the future, so our kids need a cushion of self esteem.

* Talk to him every day abt how special he is - including holidays & wkends
* Read age appropriate books abt bullies,school, & self esteem (library)
* Tell him that he's really great w/ppl & he can handle anything
* Tell if someone doesnt realize how special he then they are CONFUSED ...this has helped IMMENSELY w/my kids
* Role play w/him reactions & what to do in certain situations - use puppets(socks over hand will work) & act out diff scenarios. Take turns being the "bully" & the one that's being bullied. (You can learn a LOT by letting DS play the bully).
* Talk to the teacher abt SPECIFIC ways for DS to handle the bully. YOUR SON NEEDS TO FEEL HE HAS SOME CONTROL OVER THE SITUATION- other than crying. Work out a postive reaction plan where DS can react to the bully.
* Play "school" at home. Again, do role plays w/DS being the teacher, then you. Follow whatever flow he takes as you role play.
* Try not to put too much emphasis on his crying.When you're playing dont let him know the purposes, etc. Just make it fun & playful.

These steps have helped a number of kids I've seen through a yrs of working in daycares,churches, MDO & CDC's.

If the problem is also that he misses you - time,time,time. There a few things that can help with the adjustment:

* Ask the teacher about letting him wear a watch & mark the hands on it with the time you're coming back. Or set a watch to beep when it's almost time to go. A kitchen timer also works well. (It's often up to the teacher)
* Let him carry a fav toy or stuffed animal, etc & put in his backpk or cubby hole. Or even a picture(but I've pics of parents acctually make them cry worse). A pic you color together sometimes helps.
* There's a song I think the name is "Momma Comes Back" & it's wonderful. Shows kids at school & a mom leaving & sings abt the feelings. Emphasis is on Momma comes back! It's on VHS called Baby Songs. You also can get it on tape, I believe.

You hang in there. Keep us posted on how he's doing & what the teacher advises. HTH's

When I started school I had panic attacks my mom pulled up in front of school my teacher opened the door and they both pulled and pushed me out of the car. I hated school after that.......I know it sounds stupid to some of you but it is something you might check into. Especially since he doesn't cry everyday. It sucks because you really can't explain why you feel the way you feel and it is very scary . Good luck remind him that he is a good boy and how proud you are to have a kindergartener in your family.

My son had a sensativity to noise. Have you ever had problems with him in public places, such as grocery stores and resteraunts?

I've read that some kids cry to drown out the noises that are bothering them.