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Idiot awards
Subject: Just some funny stuff.....that you can 't make up!!
At the phone company:
> This week, our phones went
> dead and I had to contact the telephone
> repair people. They promised to be out between 8:00
> a.m. and 7:00 p.m.
> When I asked if they could give me a smaller time
> window, the pleasant gentleman asked, "Would you
like us to call you before we come?" I
> replied that I didn't see how he would be able to do
> that since our phones weren't working. He also
requested that we report future outages
> by email. I asked him "Does YOUR email work without a telephone
> line?" He said "Of course not, why?"
AT WORK:
> I was signing the receipt for
> my credit card purchase when the
> clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back
> of the credit card.
> She informed me that she could not complete the
> transaction unless the
> card was signed. When I asked why, she explained
> that it was necessary
> to compare the signature I had just signed on the
> receipt. So I signed
> the credit card in front
> of her. She carefully compared
> the signature to the one I had just
> signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they
> matched.
IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:
> I live in a semi-rural area.
> We recently had a new neighbor call
> the local township administrative office to request
> the removal of the
> Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too many
> deer were being hit
> by cars and she didn't want them to cross there
> anymore. I could swear
> I've recently been with some of these people...
IN FOOD SERVICE:
>My daughter went to a local
> Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She
> asked the person behind the counter for "minimal
lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had
iceberg.
SIGHTING #1:
I was at the airport, checking
> in at the gate when an airport
> employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your
> baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied,
"If it was without
> my knowledge, how would I know?" She smiled
knowingly and nodded,"That's why we ask."
SIGHTING #2:
The stoplight on the corner
> buzzes when it's safe to cross the
> street. I was crossing with a coworker of mine when
> she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I
explained that it signals blind people when
> the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on
> earth are blind people doing driving?"
IDIOT SIGHTING #3:
> At a good-bye luncheon for an
> old and dear coworker who is
> leaving the company due to "downsizing," our
manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should
do this more often." Not a word was spoken. We all
> just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare.
SIGHTING #4:
> I work with an individual who
> plugged her power strip back into
> itself and for the life of her couldn't understand
> why her system would not turn on.
SIGHTING #5:
> When my husband and I arrived
> at an automobile dealership to pic k
> up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in
> it. We went to the service department and found a
mechanic working feverishly to unlock the
> driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger
> side, I instinctively tried the door handle and
discovered that it> was unlocked. "Hey," I announced
to the technician, "it's open!" To
> which he replied, "I know - I already got that
> side."
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