Weird News Thread ....

[Jolie Rouge]

Dennis Miller to join 'Boston Public'

HOLLYWOOD, -- Five-time Emmy-winning comedian-actor Dennis Miller will join the cast of Fox's "Boston Public" for three episodes next season. Miller will play an investment banker who, convicted of securities fraud, avoids jail time by agreeing to community service -- his worst nightmare -- teaching math at the inner city school in Boston.

Most recently, Miller wrote, produced and performed in the cable stand-up special, "The Raw Feed," on HBO, which premiered in April. Currently, Miller is providing weekly commentary for "Hannity & Colmes" on the Fox News Channel on cable. Miller spent two years doing color for ABC-TV's "Monday Night Football" and completed 215 episodes of "Dennis Miller Live" for which he won five Emmys. He spent six years on "Saturday Night Live's" Weekend Update on NBC.

[Jolie Rouge]

The Smoking Gun published a 20-year-old interview with California governor candidate Arnold Schwarzenegger the same day 20 state Republicans endorsed his run for governor. In the interview, Arnie admitted to smoking "grass and hash," hanging out with "hookers and bar owners," and joining in a group-sex sencounter. Arnie is brushing off the story and doesn't consider it important anymore..........


{{{ 20 years ago -- wasn't everybody ?? ******

[Jolie Rouge]

Since being fired from The Practice, a furious Lara Flynn Boyle has been returning every gift producer David E. Kelly ever gave her. She stormed into Bloomingdale's and returned two gifts, ( a beautiful watch and a silver letter opener),for a store credit. When she received the store credit, she told the clerk that she would be back with more of his "stuff" when she finds it.......Guess there's no time limit for stars to return items huh? We'd be treated like common criminals...



DETROIT -- A pair of thieves with a sweet tooth stole a Krispy Kreme truck and then held it for ransom. During a delivery outside a gas station, the truck driver heard a noise coming from the truck's trailer, and when he jumped in to investigate, the truck began to move. The vehicle, carrying 1,800 doughnuts and some equipment, kept on moving after the driver jumped out of the trailer. The crooks called a Krispy Kreme manager on the company's Nextel phone two hours later and told him if they wanted the truck back, they would have to pay $100. The manager got the police department on the phone in Detroit. The cops found one suspect at Warren and Southfield roads in Detroit with a bag of doughnuts in his hand. The other suspect was located carrying the company's phone. However, the truck was nowhere to be found.




PINCONNING, Mich. -- Police didn't have much trouble catching an accused thief as he fled the scene in a child size All Terrain Vehicle. In fact, not only was it a child's toy that could barely carry his weight, it ran out of gas, the Bay City Times reported. The man is accused of breaking into a neighbor's shed to steal a gallon of gasoline to power the tiny ATV, which he drove to a nearby party store, while dragging a bag of empty bottles he had planned on redeeming for cash. The suspect parked his tiny vehicle in some weeds and went into the store, where he allegedly took a bottle of beer and drank it in the restroom, police said. Store employees called police, who spotted him as he emerged from the weeds on his tiny fourwheeler. The suspect was charged with breaking and entering and shoplifting.






WELLINGTON, New Zealand -- Some of life's experiences are best not talked about -- such as a man being trapped for 18 hours inside a women's toilet. The Wellington Dominion Post reported the unidentified man answered "nature's call" Saturday evening but found the men's public toilet near the Petone Public Library was locked. So he used the women's toilet. The problem arose when a night watchman locked the toilet door, unaware the man was inside. It wasn't until the next afternoon -- 18 hours later -- that passersby heard his cries for help and bolt-cutters were used to release him. A police official told the Post the man was quite "relieved" to get out but not too keen about discussing his experience.






An unruly wedding guest bit off part of a man's finger during a reception in Corunna, Michigan last Friday. Michael VanStrate, an invited guest, caused altercations and arguments with several of the guests. Although he was asked to leave several times, he kept coming back. After smearing cake on a 9-year-old boy's face, the boy's father came to his rescue and had his finger bitten off during the struggle. The bridgroom then intervened. Police said that VanStrate later elbowed a 49-year-old woman, temporarily knocking her out. He was arraigned Monday on two counts of assault, one count of aggravated assault and one count of simple assault. He remained in custody after District Judge Ward Clarkson set bond at $25,000. Doctors were able to reattach the guest's finger that was bitten off in the scuffle.

[Jolie Rouge]

Bizarre Statistical FACTS

There are 318,979,564,000 possible ways of playing just the first four moves on each side in a game of chess.

In the 1970 Census, the U.S. had 2,983 men who were already widowers at the age of fourteen and 289 women, also at fourteen, who had already been widowed or divorced.

Mollusks, soft bodied animals with hard shells, are the second largest population of living things.

The total population of the Earth at the time of Julius Caesar was 150 million. The total population increase in two years on Earth today is 150 million.

People who have never married are 7.5 times more likely to be hospitalized in a state or community psychiatric facility than those who married.

[gemini26]

Ouch!

Q. Why are Episcopalians such bad chess players?

A. Because they can't tell their queens from their bishops.

[gemini26]

Mother 'put barbed wire around children's beds'

An Italian woman faces charges of child abuse after she allegedly put barbed wire around her children's beds to stop them from leaving the room.

Four children, aged between one and seven, were freed after a neighbour heard their cries and alerted police in Rome.

Their 36-year-old mother had left them trapped in their beds while she went out shopping, reported Italian media.

On her return she was immediately arrested and now faces charges of child abuse and false imprisonment. The children's grandmother who lives with them in the house was also arrested.

A social worker who had visited the family on a number of occasions said she had never seen the "cages" and neighbours also admitted they had never suspected the children were being mistreated.

[gemini26]

Policewoman suspended over prisoner's sex request

A policewoman has been suspended from her duties at an Argentine jail after a prisoner applied to have "sexual visits" from her.

Pamela Alejandra Candasi, 22, got to know prisoner Gaston Diaz while working at the main prison in the province of Tierra del Fuego in Argentina.

They fell in love when they spent time together after Candasi was assigned to accompany Diaz to court for his hearings, Clarin newspaper reports.

But the authorities did not find out until Diaz, who's serving five years for armed robbery, filed a request to have sexual visits from Candasi.

Candasi was immediately suspended from her duties and now faces the sack at an internal disciplinary hearing.

A police spokesman said: "This behaviour is unacceptable. There are some rules a police officer has to observe, even in her personal life."

Candasi's lawyer, who is fighting for her to resume her activities at the prison, said: "There is no law that says they can't have a relationship.

"She can date him and still do her job properly. And they should give her the right to visit him straight away."

[gemini26]

Fat prisoner accidentally prevents mass escape

A planned mass escape from an Argentine jail backfired when a 16 stone prisoner got stuck.

Roque Vivas got stuck in a 12ins hole dug in the ceiling by inmates of the prison at Rosario.

Five prisoners had already escaped but another 24 were waiting behind Vivas for their turn.

They ended up having to call prison guards to help their burly fellow convict, reports Las Ultimas Noticias.

A prison spokesperson said: "It was the funniest thing I've ever seen. This fat man was stuck from the waist down and shaking his legs.

"Then all the other prisoners looking really p***ed off because he stopped them from escaping."

The five men who managed to escape are still on the run.

[gemini26]

Ananova:

Dope cake nurses fall ill

Five Dutch district nurses who were celebrating a colleague's birthday had to be taken to hospital after eating a cake laced with marijuana.

The nurses bought the cake at a bakery in Amsterdam.

But they started to feel unwell soon after eating it.

Tests on the five women revealed that the cake contained traces of cannabis.

All five women were admitted to hospital in the Thuiszorg district of Amsterdam.

Three said they felt nauseous and confused while the other two were suffering from heart rhythm disorders.

One nurse was even kept in overnight for observation, according to a Nu.nl news.

Police, who were informed of the "space cake", are investigating the matter.

[gemini26]

Cyclist to stand trial for 'falling off bike'

An 11-year-old boy in Greece is to stand trial after falling off his bike during a race.

The boy on the eastern Aegean Sea island of Chios has been ordered to stand trial on October 13 for allegedly violating eight articles of the penal code and one traffic violation for falling off his bicycle during an annual race.

The boy - identified only by his first name as Manolis - was taking part in last year's Chios bicycle race when he suddenly fell off his bike. He was not injured in the accident, nor did he cause any injuries to other riders taking part in the race, according to reports.

The island's prosecutor said the boy fell because he was "not driving carefully and with constant rapt attention" and ordered him to appear in juvenile court.

[gemini26]

Brothel sponsors women's football team

A German women's football team is being sponsored by a brothel.

Teutschenthal players will take to the field sporting shirts recommending that their fans visit X-Carree.

The slogan X-Carree: Always Worth a Visit, will be emblazoned across the player's chests, reports IOL.

The brothel, owned by a real estate firm in the eastern city of Halle, agreed to pay for the women's new grey and red kits.

Coach Andreas Dittman commented: "The women have no problem with it."