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Jolie Rouge · 07-23-2007, 05:28 PM

Via LGF, which had to go all the way back to this morning to find a troop-hating post in the dKos archives as filthy as “Killitary” — which, for the record, was a pro-troop troop-hating post. This one would be a career killer if there was a career left to kill; as it is, although it’s clearly not a joke, it’ll magically become one once it starts making the rounds and the requisite outrage is mustered. I guess the new, not-at-all-O’Reilly-inspired pre-electoral housecleaning operation hasn’t gotten going in earnest yet.
Imagine how many episodes of SNL he could have brought to a screeching halt in the 16 years since he’s been gone if only Lorne had kept him around. For of all sad words of tongue or pen…

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2007/7/23/114037/956

I Support The Troops
by AWhitneyBrown
Mon Jul 23, 2007 at 08:59:25 AM PDT

There! I finally said it. It's something that needs to be said, it seems that no one in American politics is willing to say it, so let the chips fall where they may, I'm taking a stand.

For those of you who have a hard time reading, I enclose a video of my statement of support, and for all those who read faster than they listen, I also provide the text of my full statement below. I ask you to read it before you criticize me for my courageous stand in support of our brave troops.

Thank you.

A WhitneyBrown's diary :: ::

Because no one else in American politics seems to be willing to support our troops, I will take my stand, no matter the cost! My statement of support for our brave troops fighting in Iraq and elsewhere:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mg76Df0oSbM&eurl=

An accurate transcript follows:

Quote:

Hello, I’m A. Whitney Brown, and I support our brave troops overseas. We all do and we all should. But what about those troops who are not so brave? Perhaps they just signed up hoping for some extra money for college, for the medical insurance, or even some hot gay military sex.

Suddenly they find themselves in Iraq for the fourth or fifth time and they’re not so brave. In fact they're crapping in their pants. Shouldn’t we support them just as much? I think we should. In fact we should support them more, because a brave man does but once, whereas a coward dies a thousand deaths.

And we should say we support them, because, frankly, it just doesn’t get said often enough.

Imagine, for example, if anytime any politician mentions any aspect of the war they prefaced their statement by saying ‘I support our troops’, or ‘I support our brave troops’ or even ‘I support our brave troops, even though some of them are gay or scared ****less’.

And not just politicians, but religious leaders, news people, commercial businesses, beverage makers, car companies, defense lobbyists - they should all say they support our troops whenever they’re trying to sell their products or pimp their talking points. Because it’s the right thing to say.
Now, I can’t make people say they support our troops. But if I’m the only one who’s willing to stand up and say ‘I support our troops’, then I’ll say it; I support our troops - cowards, queers, and all.

Now I know there are some cynics out there thinking, sure you say you support our troops but what do you actually mean by ‘support’? That’s a fair question and all I can say in response is that any one asking that question is a traitorous ******* and probably should be hung for treason.

But to answer the question, what I mean when I say I support our troops is that I actually pay for their food, their ammo, their upkeep, transport, everything. I pay for all of it.

And I do that not only because I’m a patriotic American, although I am, but also because they take 35% out of my check every week and if I don’t pay it I will end up in jail.

That is what I mean by ‘I support our troops’. I mean I am involuntarily, under threat of prison, forced to pay for their support. Now do I resent that?

You’re damn right I do. Because it is stupid as hell. Other countries pay taxes, but they get something for it, like health care. What do I get? I get to kill a bunch of Iraqis. Whoopdeedoo.

What am I going to do with a bunch of dead Iraqis? Plus I don’t even get to keep them. I mean, I might like to have a skull or something to use as a paperweight, on my desk. I’m not saying I would, but it might be a nice gesture to send out a few skulls out to those of us who are paying the cost.
You know you can adopt a kid for 15 dollars a month in Brazil or somewhere and you get pictures of them living their miserable lives. But I have paid hundreds of dollars in taxes over my lifetime, hundreds of dollars, and I don’t have so much as a single picture of an Iraqi child that I paid to have killed. It would be nice to just have something, you know, to remember them by.... a picture, a lock of hair, perhaps a necklace of ears...

So yes, I resent my support for the killing of Iraqis for which I get not even a memento or trophy. But do I still support the individual men and women who have given so much to serve their country?

No. I think they’re a bunch of idiots. I also think they’re morally retarded. Because they sign a contract that says they will kill whoever you tell me to kill. And that is morally retarded.

Friends, the most important moral decision a man makes in the course of a day is "Who am I going to kill today?"

That’s a decision you should agonize over, dream about, rehearse in your mind for hours, not just leave up to some hare-brained President you didn’t even vote for.

A man’s killing list is a very personal matter. It should be between him and those persistent voices in his head.

So to sum up, I don’t like our troops, I don’t like what they’re doing, I don’t like their fat, whining families, and yet, I support them. Thank God I live in a free country.

Thank You.